Random Acts of Hutchins

Oh, a bit of this and that...

2012-01-24T17:46:00.001-08:00

Not much desire to wax poetic for me this week. I thought a bit of a slapdash post (as my friend Jill calls them) was warranted.

Michael got his wisdom teeth out -- one side before Christmas and the other side last weekend. Poor guy. He originally went in to have a tooth checked out that he thought was cracked. He left on a Friday morning at 8 and the dentist told him he had to have them out. He didn't get home until after 4 in the afternoon! Michael was aware of all that was going on. The dentists there don't like to use gas for wisdom teeth extractions. At one point, the dentist pulled a nerve out, held it up and exclaimed, "Wow! That is the largest nerve I have ever seen! It looks like a brain! (then to the tech) Take a look at this! You won't see anything like this even in a textbook!" Michael was a bit concerned that perhaps the third chapter of his dissertation went with that nerve.... In the end, Michael has been handling the whole thing like a champ. He is just now starting to feel normal again (of course, he had a period of normalcy after the pre-Christmas extraction...) I still have my wisdom teeth. How 'bout you? I would love to hear some funny wisdom teeth stories....
Ezra has quite nearly legally changed his name to Batman. He corrects everyone who calls him Ezra and even insists that the new name be put on coloring pages or craft projects he does at the Children's Center or at church. In his prayers, he thanked God for the bat cave tonight.
I mentioned church. We think we may have found a place that we might like. Of course, we've only been twice (Michael only once because he was recovering from his extraction...) I know that doesn't sound like a lot of time but sometimes, you just know. The church is literally two blocks from our home (a very reasonable and delightful walk) and is called Sojourn. It seems a bit like our Crossroads experience in Cincinnati. They have a main campus in Louisville and satellite campuses in other neighborhoods, New Albany being one of them. They just opened the doors of their recently purchased former elementary school in October. The music is amazing and the teaching is AWESOME! On a different note (for us) they take communion every week. We will be participating in a membership class on Friday evening and Saturday. Looking forward to getting the low-down on the place. Really hoping we don't show up and they tell us we have to fork over our first-born son or something...that would definitely be a deal-breaker...
I am teaching a lot more in this new year. Pretty sure I mentioned this before...sorry...but, it's my blog. I'm teaching seven classes every week, every day but Saturday. (I teach two on Wednesday.) So far, so good. Three of the classes are for kids so the cardio workout is not as intense (for me) as the grown-up classes. Yes. I am teaching fitness classes for kids, namely Zumbatomic. This is Zumba for kids and lots of fun. I teach groups of 4-7 year olds and groups of 8 to 12 year olds and I teach the classes back to back. Let me tell you, it is not easy switching out of the head space of a teacher to 4-7 year olds to a teacher of 8-12 year olds. The little ones laugh at everything I say and are not self-conscious about anything. The exact opposite is the case for my bigger ones. For instance, in both classes, we'll play a game called Freeze Dance. The title pretty much says it all but after every freeze, I give them a direction for a new (silly) way to dance (ie. you can only dance with your arms and hands!) Well, for the little ones, I often will tell them to pretend to be their favourite animals. I accidentally asked the bigger ones to do that tonight...totally not cool. Lol! The little ones really crack me up. Each class is only 30 minutes long. After ten minutes, the little ones are asking for drinks of water and if they can just sit down for the rest of class. (Trust me, this is stuff they can handle easily...they're not doing push-ups or anything....) Also, when one child has to go to the bathroom, of course, everyone else wants to go. This is nothing new but it just cracks me up. Either way, I have a lot of fun with them. I think mostly because they will always try something (unless they're extremely shy...which, of course, happens and is fine.) I just like that kids don't mind looking silly. They just have fun. On another note, I really love the Zumbatomic idea in general. If a person comes into a Zumba class having never done it before, it can be an overwhelming experience. You just dance. There is no break-down of steps or explanations or anything. Zumba does call itself an easy to follow Latin dance inspired class and, for the most part (and depending on the instructor), that is true. I will usually show up 10 to 15 minutes early for class and run through some trickier steps but that's it. The cool thing about Zumbatomic is that the kids are getting in this at the ground level. We break things down in Zumbatomic and even talk about the different Latin rhythms that are used in Zumba classes. Each rhythm has many different dance steps and we break down all of those steps for the kids. I've had so many adults ask if there was a similar class for them which has made me wonder if it might be a good idea to have an Intro. to Zumba class once a month -- a class where we go over all the rhythms and steps. I could be onto something here...
I busted up the second fight in less than six months on our street yesterday...and by bust up I simply mean I called the police from our porch after yelling a warning to the brawlers that I would be doing so. One would think this would stop the behavior. It doesn't. We live right next to New Albany High School. The first fight was between two mothers who were waiting to pick up their children. I yelled repeatedly that I was calling the cops (the 14-year old son of one of the mothers asked me to please do so), that they were on their way, etc. The cops pulled up and the brawling didn't stop. Insane. Apparently, Mother A's daughter was being bullied by Mother B's daughter. Mother A had told her daughter to talk to the principal about the problem. Apparently she hadn't. "I guess she's learned her lesson," Mother A shouted across the street at me and the police officer, cigarette dangling between her fingers. "Guess she should've gone and talked with the principal!" Oh! That's what went wrong there....wow... The fight that broke out yesterday seemed to be scheduled. Girl A pulls up in front of the house across the street in a blue Jeep, hops out, takes her sweatshirt off and stands in the street calling for her most worthy opponent. Girl B's entourage/family is on the front lawn cheering, hootin' and hollerin' until she comes out of the house herself. She runs down into the street and they both begin to bloody each other...literally. Rolling around on the ground, bludgeoning each other with their fists and I saw the whole thing get started from my kitchen window. I was horrified! I ran onto the porch, yelled my cop-call warning and dialed away. Yeah, I'm that porch lady. Unfortunately, they all pulled away right before the cops showed up (of course) but not before I got the license plate from their vehicle. C'mon! I feel like I've moved to the wild west. I LOVE the fact that I lived in the "ghetto" in Cincinnati for 5 years (my poor parents were terrified for us) and the only incident we ever had was a bunch of kids talking trash in the street to each other. Gotta love the small-town charm of southern Indiana....
So, this is getting pretty long. Maybe I will have to make an individual post for each of the above bullets. This will be the last one. Michael and I were talking last night about kids getting too cool for their parents -- you know, not wanting them to be around when their friends are around, etc. We both admitted that we never really had that experience growing up. I actually remember feeling bad for a lot of my friends' parents. For the most part, we thought our parents were fun to hang around with -- even with our friends! I made mention of the fact, though, that I only got too cool to be around my parents when I became a senior in high school and I got a boyfriend (my first real one) and I didn't want them to catch us making out. So, in my mind, being too cool for your parents means you have something you want to hide from them. Any thoughts? I'm sure this is a simplistic view on the matter but, then again, maybe not. Did you like to hang out with your 'rents (as this generation calls them?) Were Michael and I just major nerds? (Ok...maybe don't answer that last question...)

A Smart Phone

2012-01-19T18:21:00.000-08:00

The title is not a clever play on words. No, it is a simple statement of an object...one I now own. Yes, I have finally joined most of my peers (and seniors and juniors) and obtained a smart phone. This little phone could easily become an addiction for me. This came as a surprise to me (and maybe to some of you, if you know anything about me) because I have never been the gal who needs to have the latest and greatest phone. If I'm due for an upgrade on my plan, I always opt for the free phone and up to this point, the free options have not been fancy-dancy smart phone options. I'm cool with that, though. We are a family on a tight budget and buying a smart phone has not really been an option. How did I come by this phone, then? you may ask. Well, any fancy-dancy phone I've ever had (relative to the culture) has been given to me by my mother. She usually gives me them because she has just purchased the latest and greatest version. Works out well for someone like myself with low cellular expectations. This is the case with my new-to-me phone -- the Samsung Intercept. My sister came to visit me this past weekend (we had a FABULOUS time, by the way, as is ALWAYS the case...) and my mother sent it with her. I only just had the opportunity to go have it set up as my phone yesterday in a Sprint store. I have used the term "smart phone" up to this point. Here is Mandi's definition of a smart phone:

1. It has a touch screen that twirls when you turn the phone.
2. You can access your email, Facebook, YouTube and the internet in general on it.
3. You can get apps for it.

Mine is an Android phone....which probably means more to some of you at this point than it does to me...but I'll get there. I am most certainly aware that there is more to a smart phone than the above, hence the name, but I am determined to become smarter than my smart phone. The question is, how do I do that? Well, the users guide would probably be the best place to start (downloading it as we speak) but, I also imagine that I can gain some good ground simply by spending some good ol' fashioned quality time with it. This is a problem. I am a mother with a part-time job outside the home and pretty darn busy (most of us are.) This is where things are going to start getting transparently and brutally honest (as in, you may not want to be my friend anymore once I share with you the thoughts that have not only run through my head, recently, but have been seriously entertained.) Most of you know there is always something to be done, especially for a neat freak like myself -- always a load of laundry that needs to be folded and put away, always a dishwasher that needs to be emptied and refilled (particularly if you have a camper-sized one as is our case...), always a child that needs to be fed, bathed, disciplined, played with, read to, engaged, always groceries to buy...the list goes on and on and on. Because of this, I rarely, if ever, find myself sitting down during the daytime hours to just do something fun. All my fun-time stuff (ie. crocheting, blogging, movie-watching) is done after Ezra is in bed. This is the deal I have made with myself. I am allowed to sit down and take it easy after 8:30 at night. Some of you may think I have a problem while others of you may be saying, "What's wrong with that?" For me, right now, this pattern is cool. What's not cool, though, is the guilt that I feel when I do decide to do something fun just for Mandi in the middle of a day. It's at this point when visions of field-workers toiling under a hot sun or factory workers standing at a machine-press performing the same mindless task over and over a million times in a dimly lit factory or nurses in OB units working the graveyard shift or customer service specialists surrounded by the gray walls of cubicles in a windowless office talking with irate customers for 10 hours a day start popping into my head. It's the thought of those people that keeps me going when I normally decide to sit and have a moment for myself. This phone, though, has thrown a wrench into that whole line of thinking. Confession time: I spent nearly two hours laying in my bed today playing--I MEAN trying to figure out how my new phone works! TWO HOURS! Now, lest you begin to fear and tremble, I had just finished cleaning our entire home in the morning top to bottom -- floors, toilets, dusting, everything, laundry -- had fed Ezra and during my phone time, he was occupied with toys of his own in his room while listening to Paddington Bear on his CD player. Well, that's not so bad, you may be saying to yourself. Well, my confessing isn't over with....here are some secret and not so secret thoughts and actions I have had or done:

Yes! I'm driving alone to the Clark county YMCA (this one is the further of the two YMCA's that I work at...about a 15 to 20 minute drive) to teach a Zumba class. I can play with my phone while driving out there! Gasp!
When can I play with my phone next....?
What's something I could do with my phone now....?
Ezra: Hey, Mom! Watch this! Me (while playing with my phone): Uh huh....
(Upon hearing any small sound) Was that my phone?!
Just sitting and moving things around on the screen
Sleeping with it

While these are not exaggerations, I am happy to say that they are not patterns of behavior yet, just big-time red flags! The first step out of addiction is recognizing and naming a problem for what it is, right? So, I've already fought the hardest battle....I believe it's safe to say that the smartness of a smart phone lies not in its ability to manage your life down to the tiniest of details, but to make you dependent on it--to suck you into yourself and then spit you and your dull vacant expression back out onto a playground in the glaring sun with your child or a lunch date with a senior citizen.... So, back to my earlier question...how do I become smarter than my smart phone? Oh, I can figure out how best to use it, how to get the most out of it but I will totally dominate it by not becoming a slave to it or treating it like my precious....by not getting sucked into myself....

P.S. the app Out of Milk is fantastic! right up this list-makers alley....

Just Bourne

2012-01-17T17:37:00.000-08:00

SO.....although our new schedule calls for independent writing time tonight, we're watching The Bourne Supremacy instead. Now, before you despair over our lack of discipline, just know that Michael received the Bourne trilogy as a gift from my brother and we have been planning to watch all three, three nights in a row...we will resume our regular schedule on Thursday....not that we're slaves to it....

My Budding Storyteller

2012-01-11T11:59:00.000-08:00

I cannot tell you how much joy this gives me...I promise, we do not sit down and practice this stuff....Ezra broke out in the following after breakfast this morning:

The "Fun" Schedule

2012-01-10T17:43:00.000-08:00

Wow! This is my 201st post! Just realized that...pretty cool...and before I get into it, I need to thank everyone who responded to my last post with words of encouragement and stories of their own. You were very affirming to me and I appreciate, very much, your feedback.

So, Michael and I have resolved in this new year to be more intentional about the ways in which we spend our evening time (ie. the time after which Ezra is in bed which is usually by 8:30 at the latest.) Our pattern in the past has been one that we picked up while in Germany and it has been as follows:

Get Ezra in bed, Mandi sits in green recliner, Michael lounges on brown couch, watch 2 more episodes of whatever show we've decided to follow on Netflix, go to bed.

There are advantages to this plan. They are as follows:

We are together.
We are relaxing.
We watch some pretty cool shows.

There are also some disadvantages. They are as follows:

We don't talk a whole heck of a lot except when we pause our show to discuss a particular choice made by the director or costume designer or screenwriter.
We aren't doing other things we enjoy doing as well (ie. playing games, writing, singing, painting.) We find ourselves talking about these things we like to do a whole lot during the day but autopilot seems to be "day is done, turn on tv."

So, our new plan is a bit of a compromise. We typically spend at least two hours together, child-free every night. We have decided to take the first hour and pursue another fun past-time and then in the second hour, we get to watch one episode of our current show. For example, last night we played games for the first hour (Michael is becoming a Yahtzee junky) then watched our show. Fun times all around. We've actually found that we had to intentionally schedule in these pursuits. So, here it is:

Monday: Michael/Mandi game night
Tuesday: Michael and Mandi write individually
Wednesday: Michael paints and Mandi may be involved in that somehow...
Thursday: Michael and Mandi free write together (I really enjoy this one...)
Friday: Music night (Michael's been wanting to learn guitar, I've been wanting to better myself on the bass, we also like to sing old hymns together)
Saturday: Family game night

I'm super excited about all of these things! Super excited that I like to spend time with my hubster and that we get to spend time together.

So...I'm writing...'cause that's what I get to do tonight. That's not to say that it won't happen at other times, but it's nice to know that this time is always dedicated to it.

That's what is currently going on in the Hutchins household. But what about Christmas? Yes, we did celebrate it, as is our wont. We were able to spend two weeks traveling and visiting family. We spent week one and the actual Christmas holiday with my family in Three Rivers, Michigan and week two, which included a New Year's Eve celebration, with Michael's family in Wauseon, Ohio. As usual, Ezra was very blessed with a multitude of gifts. Our families are very generous. Every year Michael and I have the same discussion, though, about trying to raise a child who doesn't open a gift and say, "Where are my other presents?" Of course, our child would NEVER say this....(I'm really hoping you sense my sarcasm there...) What is polite at Christmas? We find ourselves trying to squash his sense of expectation. After all, we don't want a child who expects the people who love him to bless him.....hmmm....this is something I've been wrestling with. Christmas, as us Christians celebrate it, is the fulfillment of one of the biggest hopes and expectations of all time -- the birth of our savior! Is it wrong to hope? Even if that hope is in the earthly loved ones that we share our lives with? I know, I know...this sounds like a gross misuse of theology to excuse my son's bad manners...that's not what I'm trying to do...I am, however, trying to examine my own life to see what this means for me and how I relate to God. Do I hope for things from him? Do I think it's wrong to? And, you know, sometimes I think I do feel it's wrong...and that's kind of weird....since I want Ezra to be able to hope for blessings from me...now I'm equating myself with God...danger...warning....anyway....just something I've been thinking about and having a difficult time parsing out here...obviously...

One specific shout-out on the gift-giving front this year: pretty sure my sister, Haley, wins the award for most thoughtful gift given. We draw names in our family and she drew mine. For my gift, she took the time to print out ALL of my blog posts from our year in Germany and put them in individual plastic sheets in a binder for me as a book! I can't remember the last time I cried when I opened a gift...actually...I'm not sure if I've ever cried over a gift before...but...I definitely cried when I opened that. Ever since we got back from Germany, I have said that I would like to do that but, of course, I've never found the time. I love you, Haley! You are the best sister a girl could ask for! She and Hogey (her husband) also gave Ezra a pretty sweet gift this year -- some dress-up clothes which include a handmade (by Hogey's mom) Sherlock Holmes outfit complete with fake pipe and real magnifying glass and a wildlife explorer vest with binoculars and a compass! Just amazing!

In other, less soulish issues, the weather in New Albany, Indiana has been insane! We're talking a high of 60 today! Far be it from us, though, to ignore such eccentric weather patterns. Can't remember the last time I went to the park in January and we went twice this week! Today at the park, I spread out on my back on an unused see-saw and just soaked up the vitamin D. I felt like a cat in the sunny spot. Of course, the forecast calls for snow this weekend but, that's all right. We like snow too.

Continuing with the present, I am working more in this new year than I did in the last. Last year I taught two classes a week at the local YMCAs. This year I will teach 6 and another one at Indiana University Southeast! Four of the classes are straight Zumba classes and the other three are Zumbatomic -- Zumba for kids ages 4 to 12! I recently became certified to teach this format and, so far, I LOVE teaching these classes. The kids are so fun! Thankful for the ease of this extra income. I really could not have a more perfect job as a mostly stay-at-home mom. If Michael is unable to look after Ezra during any of my classes, he can just come with me and go to the Y's child watch. At IUS, he can go to the Children's Center! Also, I'm getting paid to work out! Blessings all 'round.

And my time's up! This has been a bit of a slapdash post...I think it's just been such a long time that I'm a bit giddy (some may say, incoherent) but, according to my schedule, it's time to go watch our show...

Memoir of a Miscarriage

2011-11-13T16:37:00.000-08:00

I am giving you fair warning. This is a long post and it may be more about our lives than you're interested in reading but I needed to write about this very difficult experience. So, read on at your own risk or just skip it altogether.

Thursday, 27 October 2011

It started off as a normal day. I was taking Ezra and Michael to IUS -- dropping Michael off for work and taking Ezra to the Children's Center. Ezra had a doctor's appointment scheduled for the afternoon that he was not looking forward to because he had to get his flu shot booster. He was telling us as much on the way. "Well, I have a doctor's appointment today too," I said. "I'm meeting my doctor who will be taking care of me while I'm pregnant...he's the one who will catch the baby when it comes out!"

"Will the baby be covered in poop?" Ezra chuckled.

"No, but it will be slimy!" I replied.

"What?!"

"Yup! The nurses will clean it off and put a diaper on it and then wrap it in a blanket. Then they will hand the baby to me to hold," I explained with a smile.

"I will hold the baby to...," Ezra grinned.

***

An hour later I sat waiting for the doctor to come in the exam room. As I waited, I read an entire article about Ellen DeGeneres in Good Housekeeping. After I finished, I had time to consider the upcoming exchange. Ok...hold your ground. Don't let them push you around about how you're going to give birth. Don't take any crap. Let him know that you are not a gal to be tangled with...where is he for crying out loud?....I hope I will still have time to make it to my body pump class after this...

Finally he came in....with a resident. He introduced himself and the resident. We chatted for a bit...family, jobs, moving history, Ezra history, other small talk in general. "Well, let's try to get a listen to baby's heartbeat!" he said.

I laid back and lifted my shirt...a maternity one that I felt a little silly for wearing but I had started showing a bit (even though I was only 11 weeks along....things started showing with Ezra around the same time...) and didn't quite have the cute bump thing going on yet...really just something to cover up the bloaty looking stomach that leaves most people you encounter struggling to figure out if you're pregnant or just a little thick around the middle...The resident placed her doppler thing on my belly. She had some issues and after a few tries that included some embarrassed giggles and nervous glances at the doctor, handed things over to him. "He'll probably find it right away," she said, self-deprecatingly. However, he also had some issues. They decided to go inside to push up my uterus to see if that might help things. "Have you had any spotting during this pregnancy?" he asked, as nonchalantly as possible.

"No..."

"Hmmm... 'cause you are right now..."

Still no heartbeat. They withdrew and stated that we should do an ultrasound.

As I sat up, I pulled my shirt down and asked, "Are you concerned?" even though I already knew what his response would be.

"A little...we'll get you in ultrasound and if the pregnancy is viable, we'll go from there..." I immediately noticed the shift in semantics. Moments earlier we had been talking about "baby's heartbeat" and now we were talking about "viable pregnancies".

Fifteen minutes later I was in ultrasound. I could tell not only from the image but from the restrained look on the tech's face that things weren't good. No heartbeat, no movement..."I'd feel better if I went inside for a look...," she said. No heartbeat, no movement... "The baby's measuring at about 7.5 weeks...I'm so sorry..."

***

Twenty minutes later I was sitting in the car in the parking lot in shock. How could a day start out so deceptively normal? There was no doubt in my mind that I was pregnant. I had been tired to the point of requiring daily naps, I felt like I was busting painfully out of all my pants, I was cracking eggs directly into the sink absentmindedly, and breaking out like a 13-year old! But then I realized...that wasn't really happening anymore...and then I remembered...a very specific memory from about a week earlier. I had been in the bathroom and realized that I hadn't been feeling this way..."I don't feel pregnant anymore," I reflexively thought and instantly felt guilty for having such a thought. "Oh, you're probably just coming out of that first trimester junk," I reasoned...

Within the next hour and a half, I had spoken with nearly every one of my family members but Ezra. The crying and explaining wore me out. I had to get myself together in order to go pick up Ezra from the Children's Center and Michael from work.

I walked into the Children's Center. "Ezra your Mommy's here," his teacher called to him. I just found out my baby died! was what I wanted to scream. Instead I did what I was supposed to do...I plastered on the smile, thanked them, and wished them all a lovely afternoon. Ezra and I headed to the car. "Did you have fun? What did you make?" He still believes it's a perfectly normal day...

We got ourselves into the car and headed over to Michael's building. Of course, he knew but because Ezra didn't our ride home was awkward at best.

When we got home Michael took Ezra inside to feed him lunch. I sat in the car and spoke on the phone with the one other person I had not yet spoken with, my mother-in-law, Nancy. She has experienced multiple miscarriages and I was desperately seeking advice as to how we should talk to Ezra about this whole thing...or if we should at all... He had been talking about the baby and asking more questions recently unsolicited. For the moment, though, we thought we would just wait to see when he mentioned the baby again and then tell him that it would just be a little longer than we thought until the baby got here. For some reason, we deluded ourselves into believing that he wouldn't mention the baby again for a while....

***

Ezra still had to go to the doctor...we had to go even though Michael and I had not had a chance to sit and talk with each other at all.

Naturally there were tiny babies at the pediatrician's office...people who wanted to make small talk in the waiting room...Ezra to try to distract from his intense fear of the shot...I had to keep it together....no one in that office ever had any idea of the information I had just received...How many people do I encounter like this on a daily basis? I thought....Someone who just found out her father died, a man who just found out he will die within the year, a woman who just found out that she will never be able to have children....the possibilities are endless....

Ezra made it through his shot (however, there was quite a bit of melodramatic limping that took place the rest of the day...) We went home where I set him up to watch Peter Pan. Michael and I finally had a moment alone. We cried and prayed. I had a chance to run my hair-brained scheme for interacting with Ezra on the matter by him....he agreed it was a good plan...equally deluded...

***

Bedtime rolled around. We always sing a song and on this particular night, we chose the chorus of Count Your Blessings. "I want to name my blessings!" Ezra blurted out.

"OK!"

"You and Daddy and the baby...." he went on but I hadn't heard anymore after "baby". For some reason, the pain in my chest took me by surprise.

"Ok...let's talk to God..." I said.

"God, thank you for Mommy and Daddy and the baby," Ezra gushed. It was uncanny. Honestly, he had not mentioned the baby this many times together. He had never seemed so aware as he did at that moment. I instantly knew that we had to scrap our original plan. I could not handle letting him go on thinking there would be a baby when there wouldn't. It wasn't fair to him and it was very painful for me to go on with the pretense.

***

The next morning, I woke up and got on the worldwide web....surely it could tell me what to do...right? Sure enough, I Googled "talking to your preschooler about miscarriage" and wouldn't you know that all kinds of interesting stuff came up. Of course, I had to be discerning...all kinds of crazies get on the worldwide web and even if you don't agree with the things they spout off, all it takes is planting a seed and something can nag at you (ie. "Are you sure you miscarried? Maybe you're still pregnant...") Most of what I found was encouraging me to tell Ezra and that it was a good plan. I spoke with Michael about it who, it turns out, was having similar concerns. I wanted to do it that morning because we were getting ready to leave that afternoon to go to Michigan to see my parents and siblings. Michael wasn't going with us and, naturally, I wanted him to be a part of the conversation. I also felt we needed to tell Ezra before we departed because I didn't want him babbling on, blissfully ignorant, among our informed and heartbroken family. Also, he was so excited about the trip to see DRams and Poppio that, quite frankly, I thought that happiness may help to temper his sorrow.

"We have something we want to talk with you about," I began at the breakfast table. "You know the baby in my belly...?"

"Yeah," Ezra responded casually, munching his toast.

"Well, it was very sick...so sick that it couldn't live...and God decided to take the baby to live with Him..."

He immediately burst into tears (admittedly a much stronger response than I had anticipated) and reached for me. "That's not fair!" he sobbed.

"I know..." I sobbed in return. I held him as he continued to cry. They were cries of severe disappointment and anger. After a while, I went on. "God knew, though, that the baby wouldn't live...He may even have known that the baby could have made Mommy very sick..."

"We will be trying to have another baby, though," Michael said. "We think you would make a great big brother!"

We sat in silence, except for our sobbing.

Then, for some reason, the following came out of me. "You know, Ezra, there are women in this world who can never have children because their bodies won't let them."

He responded with a gasp. "What?!"

"Yes...you know, they see you with me and they think, 'Man...she is so lucky....I wish I could have a boy of my own like that...' They are very sad because they never will be able to...but we have you! We are so blessed to have you. You are one of our biggest blessings!"

"I'm a blessing?" he laughed through his tears.

"Absolutely!"

***

Most of what I read said that small children take things in stride. We made our trip and as the week went on, Ezra did not mention the baby once. Several explanations came to my mind. 1.) He's so distracted by the fun he's having here with DRams and Poppio and his cousin, Emma Jane, that he's just not thinking about it...true to a child's form, he is just living in the moment. 2.) He's got some sort of children's sixth sense that he shouldn't mention it for fear of making me sad. One of my biggest concerns when we told him was that afterward he would feel that the topic was taboo. I really wanted him to know that he could talk with us about the whole thing whenever he wanted without fear of causing us to be consumed by grief. I had actually read and interacted with folks who said they had these exact feelings (both children and parents) and because of that, it was never talked about. It's a natural way to interact with the whole thing. We don't want to cause our loved ones unnecessary pain, so, of course, we just don't mention it.

Motivated by my strong desire to have that not be the case in our situation, I broached the topic, cautiously, with Ezra as we were preparing to say our prayers at bedtime. "So...is there anything you want to talk with God about tonight (we always start off this way but then I added).....anything you're happy or sad or excited or angry about?" Yes...I was fishing... He instantly burst into tears and my mind instantly started racing as I drew my sobbing boy into my arms. "What's wrong, honey?" I said as the tears started welling up in my eyes.

"Remember that toy golf set that I had when we lived in Cincinnati that was broken and you threw away?" he sobbed. "I really want another one!" he wailed.

Relief instantly washed over me...surprise as well, since this was the first time he had mentioned this particular toy since we had thrown it away in April! Of course, I wanted to laugh, but he was very serious. I talked him down, relieved to know that he hadn't been suppressing any grief.

A couple weeks passed and Ezra asked, again, if we would be staying in the home that we are currently living in. (We had this conversation before this horrible thing took place. In that conversation, I told him that even if we ended up staying in New Albany, we would probably move to a different home that was a bit bigger so the baby could have its own room. At that point, he informed me that he would be happy to share his room with the baby (poor boy, really is just about as tired of moving around as I am...)) On this particular occasion, I told him we would move because we will probably buy a place if we stay. He made his usual argument about sharing his room. I was taken aback since he hadn't mentioned it in a while. "Do you remember about the baby?" I tentatively asked him.

"Yeah," he said. I could tell from his tone that he understood his mistake.

"What do you remember?" I asked, just to be sure.

"That it died," he said sadly...but he didn't burst into tears. This gave me confidence to make a habit of finding moments to talk about the whole thing in a healthy way.

One intentional thing I did was to get a Christmas ornament for our tree that memorialized the baby. I got out the ornament as we decorated the tree and told Ezra what it was. "Every year, when we hang the ornament on our tree, we will remember the baby," I told him. "Does that sound like a good plan?" I asked him.

"Uh huh," he responded, solemnly.

More conversations have happened and I am thankful to say that the whole thing is not taboo.

***

Remember the worldwide web mentioned that children tend to take these things in stride...didn't say anything about grown-ups. Some of the thoughts I am about to reveal may sound completely ludicrous but they are thoughts I had nonetheless.

Thinking back, I remember the first question I asked the doctor as soon as I found out. "How soon can we start trying again?" Yes, we still want to have another one, but I was surprised that I wanted to know because there was a fear deep in me that maybe I was broken. I wanted to get pregnant as soon as possible more as a way to prove to myself (and others!) that I wasn't. That I could still do it if I wanted to. I realized not long after having lots of conversations with women who have miscarried that this must be the case particularly if a woman miscarries her first pregnancy. I can't even imagine the fear that must try to take hold of her. At least I know that I worked once!

While spending time with my family immediately after finding out, I was surprised to find myself concerned about how others thought I was handling this grief. My sister and I snapped silly photos of ourselves as we made Halloween treats in my mother's kitchen. She, of course, immediately sent them to her Facebook page. What if people who know see those photos? I thought. They may think this whole miscarriage thing is not big deal to me. Yes...I know it sounds ridiculous, but, there you have it. I found myself trying to find ways in conversations to let people know that they didn't have to handle me with kid gloves. After all, I've been that person before. I know exactly what she's thinking! I had to have the right combination of reserve, solemnity, and normalcy to set the person at ease. It was mentally and emotionally very tiring.

Currently, I am finding that Michael and I are, for the most part, doing pretty well. I have heard it said that grace is a gift but I have never really fully understood that until I had this experience. There are moments when the only way I can explain how we are able to handle things is God's grace but, I would be lying if I said that there are not moments of INTENSE grief...and it always takes me by surprise. Before I got pregnant, there were several toys in Ezra's room that I had been telling myself I needed to put in storage since they were just too young for him and his interest in them showed that. Then I got pregnant and the procrastinator in me rejoiced! "Well, you might as well keep them out," she said. "Nine months will go very quickly and you'll just have to get them out again." Fast forward a month after the miscarriage where you will see me standing on the ladder leading up to our attic. Michael hands the Playskool farm up to me. I freeze, the top half of my body in the attic, the bottom half in the hallway. Violent sobs begin to shake my body...intense grief. It's like finding out I had miscarried all over again. At the very least, a very concrete act casually admitting the reality of it all. Michael holds me as I silently sob and snot all over his shirt. Ezra, blissfully ignorant of the whole scene, is just around the corner laughing as he watches a favourite television program.

I see a woman on a television program who is pregnant go into a hospital and have her baby. I'm fine but, as she sits in the hospital bed, with the swaddled baby in her arms, talking casually with her husband, I see it's little hand poke out and that is what sends me from zero to one hundred in less than a split second. Michael pauses what we were watching and comes to me.

Michael sleeps soundly next to me in bed as I read the memoir of a teenage mom by the low light of our Kindle. She begins to talk about the birth of her second child. She's the mother of two now, she explains. No longer the mother of one, which, in her mind, is more of a fluke than anything. Grief and the fear that others don't see me as a "real" mom because I only have one child take over and the tears pour out silently as Michael sleeps on.

I have never experienced grief that intense before. Physically, it feels as though someone has punched me in the chest. I lose my breath. The only other time my emotions have had such a physical impact on my body was when I was falling in love with Michael. It must have something to do with intense emotions since I felt the same way when he would kiss me in those formative months of our relationship. Thankfully, the grief goes just as quickly as it comes and I am able to move on. I've found the things that trigger it are the things I had started to hopefully anticipate.

It seems God always uses any harrowing experience to teach us things about ourselves. Naturally, that has been true in this case. I will not be consumed because I am His child and I find great relief and peace in that. I also find relief in knowing that He knows what's going on. He wants us to be as little children, being anxious for nothing. I'm certainly a champ at being anxious for all kinds of things. He has clearly reminded me that I don't have to struggle under a heavy burden, though, because He did it already. I've learned more and more to live in the moment. I've found myself approaching each day and moment with the following question, "What do I know for sure right at this moment?" Turns out, it's not a whole lot. Nine times out of ten are spent worrying about what could happen. Finding the grace to let go of those nine times, when it happens, is very freeing. I also found out that I am really interested in finding out what other wise, trusted people in my life think about certain situations that I'm going through. In general, I do believe this is a healthy practice since I believe God uses his people to speak truth into our lives. I have found, though, that sometimes those folks don't agree which just sends me into a tailspin. I have come to realize that, yes, God does use his people, but He doesn't limit Himself to them (thankfully!) I have been challenged to listen for his voice speaking to me directly (admittedly something I've not been so great at in the past since I don't always trust myself.) This has been pretty cool because, it turns out, God uses songs in many instances to speak to me. And, oddly enough, they're usually old hymns that are resurfacing from my hymn-filled past. We're talking about songs I haven't heard or even thought about for 20 years! It's been wonderful!

I know I will continue to be surprised by the moments of grief but I am thankful to be at the point where I am able to say, "God is good all the time."

Why I Don't Have Wicker Laundry Baskets OR Why It's Important to Monitor Your Toddler's Teethbrushing Methods

2011-10-21T06:46:00.000-07:00

So...Ezra has been doing a lot more things on his own lately (given his age, this is appropriate...) Some of these things, however, are big responsibilities. The big one, these days, is brushing his teeth on his own. I set everything up for him and he does it all on his own...well, mostly. He has one of these toothbrushes. It flashes for the amount of time you are supposed to brush your teeth. I tell him when the toothbrush is done flashing to let me know and I come in and give him a just-in-case once-over. He's sometimes a little frustrated by my butting in but I tell him that this is something you don't want to mess around with. While I'm sure he's doing a good job (and about half the time he does...the other half is more twisting the toothbrush around in his mouth absent-mindedly) this is something you don't want to mess around with. "After all, I don't want to have to take you to the dentist to drill out any cavity bugs, right?" It occurred to me as he skipped out of the bathroom that, although he's been warned of this danger many times, he really has no concept of what those little bugs are so I got on Google images and found this lovely photo. I figured a visual image may help him to better understand the importance of doing this job correctly. I think it did. We both sat there looking at it with disgusted grimaces. One of us nearly broke down in tears from the shear horror of the sight....I'll let you guess who. And before you think my tactics were too extreme or that I may be a bit of a micro-managing mama, let me be the first to tell you, there is a very real reason as to why I am this way regarding the brushing of teeth.

When I was a little girl, I brushed my teeth on my own....at least, I was given the responsibility not only to do that, but to model to my impressionable younger brother how to do it properly. I was nearly seven at the time, my brother was four. This should be a perfectly reasonable responsibility to bestow upon a seven-year old. At that time, my mother had a large, wicker laundry basket in our bathroom with a wicker lid on top. My sneaky little seven-year old self quickly discovered that if you rubbed your toothbrush vigourously enough on top of the basket, it made the same sound a brush should make when you brush your teeth. Weeks passed with my little brother and I cleaning the top of my mother's laundry basket, giggling snake-like all the while. My mother was none the wiser. I would love to go on and say that because of our deviousness, my brother and I ended up with a mouth full of cavities. Sadly, that was not the case. Somehow we were blessed with very strong teeth and, to this day, I have never had to have a cavity filled (my brother has maybe had one or two....? I do believe I have a small one in the back of my mouth, but it's fairly surface.) And, shock of all shocks...I have only been to the dentist 5 or 6 times in my entire life (one of those times was in Germany.) Anyway, I finally began to feel guilty about deceiving my mother and dragging my little brother down the path with me, so I decided one night that we should start brushing our teeth again. The price we had to pay was not in cavities...no...remember, we had been cleaning the top of a dirty laundry basket with our toothbrushes for weeks. My ignorant seven-year old self did not have the presence of mind to compute what something like that might taste like. Let me tell you, it was not good and because we couldn't tell my mom, we continued to use those disgusting toothbrushes for another week or so...have you thrown up a little in your mouth yet? I have. Somehow, we finally convinced our mother that we needed new toothbrushes and they were never used to clean the tops of any wicker laundry baskets, I can assure you. So...now you know why I'm so keen on making sure Ezra brushes his teeth the right way...and why I don't keep wicker laundry baskets in our bathrooms....

Before ending, I did want to share this one nugget of hilarity that came out of Ezra's cavity-less mouth the other day:

Me: Groan

Ezra: What's wrong, Mom?

Me: Oh, just feeling a little queasy...

Ezra: Why?

Me: Oh, sometimes when you have a baby in your belly, you feel a little queasy...you know, some people say that when you have a baby in your belly and you're VERY queasy, you might be having a girl baby...

Ezra: Hmm...probably because her long flowing hair is rubbing the inside of your tummy...

Me: using every ounce of strength to muscle back the guffawing reflex...hmmm...good hypothesis....

Reunion, Tennessee, A Baby, & Batman

2011-10-09T10:42:00.000-07:00

Well, it's not been quite a month yet, which is pretty good for me these days....

The last full weekend of September we had a particularly special treat. In Louisville, there was a German Studies conference of sorts (which is a treat for some, but that is not the treat of which I am speaking.) Apparently, this is a pretty important conference and academics from all over the country travel to it. Fortunately for us, this list of academics included several who we happened to meet and spend lots of time with while in Marbach. Our friend, Carola, stayed with us for the weekend and on Saturday evening, we had a big homemade pizza party reunion. It was so surreal to see so many faces around our table in New Albany -- faces that were last seen around our table in Marbach. It was quite a satisfactory experience which made it all the more sorrowful to say goodbye.

The following Monday, Ezra and I headed down to Tennessee for a surprise visit. My grandparents and and uncle and aunt live there. They knew we were coming. My father, though, who happened to be there with another of his brothers to paint my grandparents' home, did not. I LOVE surprising people and being surprised and this was no exception because our visit wasn't the only surprise. Ezra and I arrived at the perfect moment. Everyone was finishing up dinner -- grandparents, dad, and two uncles -- when we came in. The look on my father's face was priceless. We all had a good laugh but then I set Ezra up on a chair and he made this announcement:

No one knew about that surprise and it was so fun to see the joy explode all over the kitchen. My dad started crying and much hugging ensued. Sorry the video quality is not the best...it was taken with my camera on my phone.

We had a nice relaxing week. Very nice to get to spend time with family we do not see too often including one great uncle Ezra hadn't seen since he was about 20 months old! As mentioned before, my dad and uncles did quite a bit of painting that week. Ezra helped out a bit.

We also got to spend some time with some very dear friends, Matthew and Isabel. They were both with Michael at UC and Matthew finished his Ph.D. in Spanish when Michael finished his in German. Matthew took a position at a university in East Tennessee about 10 minutes away from where my grandparents live. I hadn't seen either of them since May and it was quite nice to catch up a bit.

On Friday, my dad came home with Ezra and I where my mother who had just come down from Michigan was waiting for us. She hadn't heard our news yet so...

I was a little surprised that she was so surprised but that was fine with me! She was able to come to an ultrasound with me that afternoon where we both heard the baby's heartbeat. It was a very special experience for us to have together since she was unable to do anything like that with me when I was pregnant with Ezra. On Saturday, they were able to come see Ezra in his karate class and then hopped in the car and headed home afterwards. So, it was a short visit, but we'll take what we can get.

So, if you haven't picked up on it yet or have skipped ahead in this post for some reason and landed here, we are, indeed, expecting Hutchins Baby #2. We are quite excited, if not a little nervous, about parenting two children in the rapidly approaching future. The due date is around May 17th which puts me at about 8 weeks along...only 12 more weeks 'til we can find out if we have a boy or girl...only 32 until we meet him or her.... I have been doing fine for the most part. I never had morning sickness with Ezra but I am feeling a bit queasy with this one although I haven't thrown up yet. I'm also having skin issues this time around...not something I'm used to dealing with...blech... And, as with Ezra's pregnancy, I am SUPER tired. I try to take a nap in the afternoons otherwise I am worthless in the evenings. Ezra is pretty excited. As of now, he's interested in having a little sister. He prayed for one the other day.

Now, onto our firstborn...we have been discussing the topic of a Halloween costume the past couple weeks. He has been fairly indecisive. However, our friend, Matthew, gave Ezra a helpful gift when we visited him -- a trick or treat bag shaped like the head of Batman. Please understand, Ezra really has no clue who Batman is. He has never seen any Batman cartoons or read any comics. Still uncertain as to how I feel about a toddler interacting with the marvel comic superheroes of my generation.... From that moment on, though, Ezra decided he wanted to be Batman. I tried to change his mind but it seemed as though he felt obligated since he had the bag. I put it out of my mind until I passed by a Batman costume complete with muscles at the store last week. I really resisted...I'm typically a homemade costume type of gal...I finally caved in, though. I surprised him with it that afternoon. I wish I had had the camera on to record those first few moments. He literally became Batman. He instinctively struck this pose...

...and the first sentence out of his mouth was: "I wonder if this will make me fly..." He was genuinely disappointed that it did not. I reassured him, though, that Batman did not actually fly. That soothed him somewhat. He stalked around the house and I found him finally observing himself in the full-length mirror in our bedroom. He didn't see me and I heard him say to himself, "I have a job to do." He promptly turned around and started making my bed with super hero speed. The rest of the time in the suit was spent doing "jobs" all of which entailed cleaning something...obviously he's never seen the real Batman...we all know Alfred does all the cleaning... He never once called me "Mom" while in the suit. I was always Ms. Mandi and if I accidentally called him Ezra he laughed incredulously at me and corrected me. I feel fairly confident that I made the right decision in purchasing this costume. Now I am just considering a way to possibly introduce who Batman really is to him. I know some of you diehard fans out there might scoff at me, but I'm considering this. It's not quite so dark but there's still the voluptuous women to contend with....what's a mother to do? Maybe I just won't. Maybe I'll just let him continue to believe that Batman is the super hero who cleans super well...

Still here....

2011-09-20T19:18:00.000-07:00

No, we didn't fall off the face of the Earth (I know...you were so concerned...); we just moved...again.

We are officially residents of a little town called New Albany, Indiana, situated directly across the mighty Ohio river from Louisville, Kentucky...you know, the place where they race the horses and make baseball bats. After taking a lovely vacation up north in one of our favourite places -- Traverse City, Michigan -- and recovering from my disgusting bout with pneumonia, we headed down. Michael came first (he spared me the back-breaking work that is loading up a truck with all your worldly possessions) and then Ezra and I joined him the second week of August after spending a bit of time with my family. I have moved enough times now to know that I HATE living out of boxes so we unpacked all of them and set up home in one week. Here is a short video tour of our new home:

Believe it or not, we've actually already had a couple overnight visitors and this month we will have a couple more! Our dear friends the Wingers came down on Labor Day weekend from Cincinnati and last week my dear friend, Bekah, came down with her two girls from Cincinnati as well!

If you have read the above description of this blog (found under the title) you will notice the mention of a certain Roxi-roo. Roxi had the great fortune of spending the past two years with my parents. We could not take her to Germany with us (and I think she's still bitter at us over the missed opportunity to explore her motherland) and we were not willing to pay the pet rent for her last year (we told her she could get a job and pay her way but she was not interested...) We also weren't stoked about having her in an apartment setting again. Schnauzers were bred as barnyard guard dogs and, although her bark is worse than her bite, it's still no fun to listen to every time someone goes up and down the stairs. Now that we have our own home (the first since we've been married...11 years, by the way, this past July 29th) complete with a fenced-in backyard, we felt ready to take her back. I'm certain she had mixed feelings. My mother is a dog-lover and Roxi had her fair share of spoiling while with her DRams. I'd like to think that she is pleased to be with us again. It was hit or miss for us the first couple weeks. She had some health issues that were causing her to christen our home liberally, but as soon as those cleared up, she was back to her old self. She and I spend most nights attempting to share the legendary avocado La-Z-Boy recliner procured as a gift for us by Michael's mother for $1 at an auction.

Michael is settling in to his new position at Indiana University Southeast (IUS) as the German department. You heard that right. Apart from one adjunct instructor, he is the only professor in the department. He is loving it even more than he imagined. It is so exciting and liberating for him to FINALLY be doing what he has been educating himself SO long to do. So nice to have his own office (in this building) with shelves and a desk and a computer and phone and filing cabinets! The freedom to create class environments and experiences wherever his imagination can take him...and he has some GREAT ideas! I have ALWAYS known that he is a great teacher (I would have COMPLETELY failed my college economics class had it not been for him) and it is so fantastic to see him in his element. However, we are both keenly aware that things are not set in stone just yet (are they ever?...will we ever learn?) I believe I mentioned before that this position is a one-year contract. It will open up as a tenure-track position next year but Michael will have to apply for it just like every other person looking for the same type of position...and there are a lot. Of course, he has a huge foot in the door but, nonetheless, the same grueling job-search that took place last year for him will be taking place again this year. (And wasn't that just a huge, soggy wet blanket...sorry...)

Ezra and I are, naturally, keeping ourselves busy. We discovered the IUS Children's Center which is awesome! It is a childcare center on campus. Most of the instructors are IUS students working toward their degrees in early childhood education. It is more than a daycare, though. I hesitate to call it a "school" since that word is not in the establishment's title but, as far as I'm concerned, it is everything I would look for in a pre-school type setting for Ezra. It is more than just babysitting. They do activities together and there is a definite schedule to the day. Ezra only goes two mornings a week (Tuesdays and Thursdays from 8:30am to 11:30am) but he loves it. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday he and I are continuing pre-school at home. We are having lots of fun. Last year we did a small home group and that was great. But I am also definitely seeing the advantage to one on one teaching. I had thought I wanted to try to do a more formal curriculum this year complete with detailed lesson plans. I admit, I was getting a little stressed about it (helped, I'm sure, by the fact that I put off preparing until the last-minute.) I went to a large bookstore to find a book of ready-made lesson plans. There were none. I was near panic when I found a book called Home Learning Year by Year. After browsing through it and reading the opening sentence of the pre-school chapter ("I never DREAMED of having lesson plans with my pre-schoolers...."), I began to gain some clarity and remember what I knew all along. Children Ezra's age learn by doing. I turned my search into one for a good book of activities (not a workbook...plenty of those out there and we do have some but not quite the same thing...) I happened to find a MARVELOUS book at, of all places, Once Upon a Child! Here is a video of one of the activities we did together this morning:

I have picked up a couple Zumba classes at the local Y branches and Ezra is also taking Karate at the Y. He was a bit put-off by all the yelling at first (not really his thing) but we've been practicing at home and he is slowly gaining confidence and enjoying it. We are finding, though, that he is most definitely like his mother in that he is a perfectionist. Like me he also tends to have the mindset of "If I can't be fantastic at it right away, why bother?" Am I proud of this trait? No...but there it is....Here is Ezra in action:

Ezra had a really rough experience last week, poor boy. We went to his annual check-up where I knew he would be getting a flu shot. I gave him a pep talk in the car. I told him if he tried to be tough, he could get a pretzel at Target afterwards (I had to do some shopping there...) He was fine when we went in, then they poked his finger (which I forgot about.) Of course, he thought that was the shot and was not pleased when he found out there was more to come. He was equally displeased when the nurse came back in to tell us something went wrong with the test so she need to squeeze some more blood out of his finger...I almost think another poke would have been better than wrenching his finger around. More crying ensued. Then I found out that he needed two other shots besides his flu shot. Yay. The nurse came in to do the deed. I held him down at his top half and she attempted to handle the bottom half. Turns out a terrified 4-year old is a lot stronger than one would think, though. She decided to go get another nurse who came in and laid her body on top of Ezra's bottom half. The nurse got the shots in. I held Ezra and let him cry for a bit assuring him all the while that it was over. I finally convinced him that putting his pants back on was the best plan of action (he didn't want anything touching those band-aids) and then we left the room. I was immediately approached by the head nurse who sheepishly told me that the nurse administering Ezra's shots had accidentally poked herself with one of the needles after the fact so they would need to do an HIV test on Ezra...a blood draw. I could not believe it. This time around took myself and three nurses: one to find the vein and put the needle in and the rest of us to hold him down. I held his ankles and just felt completely helpless. He kept shifting his gaze from the terrifying nurses to my eyes. "Why are you letting them do this?" he seemed to ask. I wanted so badly to close my eyes but I couldn't. I felt so helpless. All the nurses were trying to soothe him with their kitty-kat voices but it all just came out as a bunch of loud cackling hens. I prayed. What else could I do? I asked God to comfort Ezra because I could not. And, of course, I cried. I felt horrible. After they got their three tubes of blood, they released him and I held his hot, exhausted body while he just trembled and cried. We did make it to Target after (Ezra is a trooper.) "You ready to get that pretzel and ICEE?!" I asked. Ezra's response: "AND a hot dog!" No argument from me.

In lighter news, Ezra and I made it out to the National Jug Band Jubilee this past Saturday. It was AWESOME! So much good music. If you have no idea what jug band music sounds like, here is a video (this is actually one of the bands -- the Juggernaut Jug Ban -- at the jubilee and the one we got to hear...they were amazing...):

This music makes me think of my dad, which is a good thing. He remembers going to visit his family in Virginia and being bored out of his mind as a boy because all they would do was sit on the front porch and play this music. He, of course, loves it now. Anyway...Ezra got to make some instruments and play on stage with some of the musicians and a bunch of other kids. It was just great:

All three of us celebrated birthdays during my blogging hiatus. Ezra turned 4 at the beginning of July, I turned 31 at the end of August, and Michael turned 35 this past week. Michael and I also celebrated 11 years of marriage at the end of July! Michael and I celebrated in our own small ways but we did have a fun party in Cincinnati for Ezra's birthday:

If you're interested in photos of our exploits, click here, here, here, and here.

pneumonia...

2011-07-14T11:59:00.000-07:00

actually spoke with my doctor on the phone today (a small miracle in and of itself) and she is 99% certain i have pneumonia. i finish the antibiotics tomorrow but they are supposed to keep working 5 days after that. at that point, if i'm not better, then i go back in to investigate the 1% part....that 1%, she said, could still be TB despite the fact that my skin test came out as negative, but she highly doubts that is the case...

so, this hare has to continue behaving like a tortoise and remember that slow and steady wins the race...pray for me...i know a lot of you have been and i really appreciate that a lot...

update...

2011-07-13T07:18:00.000-07:00

had my CT scan last night. still sweatin' the night away some-what. let's just say i normally sleep in my fleece robe because i'm always cold. not even close to being back at that point yet. hoping the doc can read my CT results today. going to have my TB test read today as well. something's defnitely residing in my chest and my new guess is that i have pneumonia. shallow breathing and a nagging cough.

unsure...

2011-07-11T07:55:00.000-07:00

went to the doc this morning. bloodwork, chest xray, found something unusual in xray, sent me with xrays back up to my doc with a big note plastered on the folder "STAT!", doc said maybe an infection, maybe TB, gave me a TB test and antibiotics, and ordered a CT scan. waiting for my insurance to authorize the scan which i will then go to sometime this week. i will also have the TB test read this week. however, it is already flat so i'm assuming that's a good sign. praying that it's just an infection and these antibiotics will take care of it. still WAY out of commission. pray for the following:

healing

my husband

ezra

that the stress of the upcoming move would not affect my health

still fighting

2011-07-06T17:09:00.000-07:00

still trying to fight the good fight against this what's-its-name virus....wow. i have not been in bed this many days in a row in a LONG time. i don't even stay in bed this long when i'm on vacation! and trust me. this feels nothing like a vacation. the doctor told me yesterday this should take about 10 to 14 days but reassured me that it should be much shorter than that....so far, i've hit the three day mark and cannot imagine spending 7 more days of this, let alone 11! prayers are greatly appreciated. not only for me but for my husband who is being super single dad! he has kept ezra entertained with make-shift home parades, swiss family robinson, hours of bike riding in very hot weather, poker, fourth of july fireworks, and hours of pretend car-playing. not to mention all the other normal stuff that has to happen like making meals and bathing and then caring for a sick person on top of that. i must find me a medal store. i never thought i would thank God that michael doesn't have a job right now but i was thanking him soundly for that last night. i cannot imagine what i would do. ain't gonna lie, though, thanking God soundly for anything the past couple days has been really hard. like i said, prayers are appreciated.

Stick? Pollen? Mouse? Monster? Mousetrain? Nothing?

2011-06-23T12:38:00.001-07:00

Ezra: (coming out of his bedroom where he was playing with lots of little tiny legos) Ouch! I need to get this stick out of my ear.

Mandi: (attempting to suppress the panic quickly rising in her voice) What? You have a stick in your ear?

Ezra: Yeah

Mandi: Ok...let's look inside. (She retrieves the only flashlight she is aware of in her home...one that is shaped like a dinosaur given as a gift to Ezra by his Auntey Haley and Uncle Hogey. At this point, Michael, her husband, Ezra's father, is aware of the situation and looks on anxiously as she gazes down his ear canal.) Hmmmm....did you put something in your ear?

Ezra: I think so.

Mandi: Well, did you or not? I need to know the truth. You won't get in trouble if you did. (She plasters a fake smile on her face to reassure the boy.)

Ezra: Well, I think it's a piece of pollen.

Mandi: Pollen?

Ezra: Yeah, from a tree.

Mandi: Where did you get the pollen? Outside our home? At the zoo? (...as the boy had been there earlier; at this point, Michael is now gazing down his ear.)

Ezra: Yeah! At the zoo!

Michael: (getting down on the boy's level) Ezra did you put something in your ear? We need you to tell us the truth.

Ezra: (grabbing his father by the cheeks) Focus, Dad. I'm telling the truth.

Mandi: What did it look like? Was it round or square or flat?

Ezra: Round!

Mandi: What color was it?

Ezra: Yellow.

Michael: Was it fuzzy--

Ezra: Yeah! Fuzzy! I think it was like a tiny mouse or a monster or something.

Mandi: Ok. Ezra, there is not a tiny mouse or monster in your ear--

Ezra: No. That was just nonsense.

Mandi: (trying not to laugh and intrigued by the fact that never, in her life, until she had a child, has she ever had to attempt to suppress laughter and panic at the same time.) Show me what you did.

Ezra: (mimes picking something out of his hand with his fingers and puts it in his mouth)

Mandi: So you put something in your mouth?!

Ezra: Yeah! I put it in my mouth and swallowed it into my ear.

Mandi: Well, it doesn't really work that way. Did you do this (she mimes picking something out of her hand with her fingers and putting it in her mouth...) or this? (She mimes picking something out of her hand with her fingers and putting it in her ear.)

Ezra: I did this (he puts the imaginary object in his ear.)

Mandi: So you did put something in your ear.

Ezra: I think so. And it sounds like this: Chugga, chugga, woo, woo!!

Mandi: It sounds like a train?

Ezra: Yeah! I think there is a little mouse in a train in my ear. A mousetrain.

Mandi: Ezra, there is not a mousetrain in your ear.

Ezra: Yeah...there's nothing in my ear...

Mandi: Listen. We need to know the truth because if you really put something down into your ear, we need to take you to the doctor to get it out.

Ezra: (with joyful excitement) Yeah! I need to go to the doctor!

Mandi: (perplexed) You want to go to the doctor? Because you have something in your ear?

Ezra: Yeah!

Mandi: But you just said there wasn't anything in your ear....

Ezra: Well....now there is...

Mandi: But I thought you wanted to watch a show. (The boy is only allowed limited television viewing throughout his day.) If there's something in your ear, we're going to the doctor and you won't get to watch a show.

Ezra: Hmmm....yeah. There's nothing in my ear...

*************************************************************************************

Just in case you're wondering: we still don't know if there's anything down there. I don't think I'm ready to fork over a hundred bucks for a doctor's visit...especially if all I have to go on is the above information.... He seems to be in no pain...but...we'll keep you posted...

A Month of Fun Firsts!

2011-03-25T06:38:00.000-07:00

So! Turns out March has been (and continues to be) a jam-packed, fun-filled month including lots of firsts! Here's a quick run-down of those firsts: playing my bass at Crossroads, seeing an African drum & dance group with Ezra, taking Ezra to the Ringling Brothers circus, meeting Ezra's newest cousin, Allie Jo, and visiting the International Museum of the U.S. Air Force in Dayton, Ohio. Not to mention the fact that Ezra and I will be leaving tomorrow morning for Tennessee where we will spend several days with my grandparents who we haven't seen since Ezra was 6 weeks old! Phew!

The Bass
For those of you who attend Crossroads and are wondering why you didn't see me play, it's probably because you are not a fifth or sixth grader. I played in the Area 56 band and was thrilled to have the opportunity to play again. I will continue to play on a monthly basis and I welcome the regular practice. I hadn't played my bass in about three years! That's just wrong.

African Music
I found out from a local parenting magazine that the Clifton Cultural Arts Center has a family showtime once a month and it's free! This month they were showcasing the Bi-Okoto drum and dance group. Ezra and I decided to check it out and we were glad we did. Lots of fun with child and parent participation....and for those of you who know how much I love dancing, you understand why it was fun for me.

The Circus
I found out from the same parenting magazine that the Ringling Brothers Circus was coming to town. Ezra seemed to be the appropriate age to justify purchasing tickets and taking him. We had a blast! We showed up early so that we could mingle with the performers on the floor (this is something everyone was allowed to do.) We got to see clowns and acrobats up close and they did some small performances for us. Very cool. As it got close to the start of the show, we were all asked to make our way to our seats. It was pretty crowded so I told Michael I would just follow him. We saw our section number (210) painted on the wall above our section while we were on the floor so we started heading in that direction. We found our row and our seats and I turned around and was astonished at how great our seats were! As is usually the case for these Hutchins, we had purchased the cheapest tickets we could get so I was certain that we would be in the nose-bleeders. But, there we were! The front row on the ring was A and we were in N. Not too bad...and I laughingly declared as much out loud! "Wow! These seats are a lot better than I thought they would be!" "Um, excuse me," came a polite man's voice. "What section are you tickets for?" "210," I replied, pointing up to the number above our section. "Uh, this is actually 110," he said, with an apologetic smile. Fortunately, we hadn't even sat down yet. I cracked up and we continued our march up the mountain. Upon arrival at our seats, I observed that with an energetic jump, I could have touched the ceiling with my fingers...Ah, yes, this is definitely more our style.... We encouraged ourselves with the fact that we could see everything that was going on at once. If we had been down on the side of the ring, we would only have seen one small part of the show....at least that's what we told ourselves... It was a pretty fantastic show. Of course, they don't allow you to bring in your own food and drinks (fortunately, I didn't try to test this policy as they check bags!) so we had to buy some drinks etc. We had grabbed a quick bite to eat pre-show but you can't come to the circus without getting cotton candy ($12...but it included a cheap circus hat) and, of course, Ezra was thirsty so we got some lemonade in a reusable water bottle ($10.) Insane! But this is why we bought the cheap tickets so we could afford the rest of the circus (we had payed $10 for parking!) Lol! On our way home at the end of the night, our route happened to take us right by where the circus train was parked. So, despite how late it was for Ezra (9:30pm) we hopped out and snapped the best photo of the night. Ezra still says this was his favourite part of the night....Here's a little video of the pre-show experience we had:

The Cousin
My brother and his wife welcomed their second child, Allie Jo, to the world about a week and a half ago. She is my parents' third grandchild and this was much cause for celebration! Ezra and I headed up to meet her this past Friday. All of my family lives in the same area in Michigan and we had not been up since Christmas so it was nice to get to see everyone again. It always amazes me how tiny newborns are. Allie weighed just a bit over 7 pounds and was 21 inches long. I was flabbergasted further by the fact that Ezra was 6 pounds 9 oz., 21 inches long when he was born so he was tinier! Unbelievable. Ezra and I had talked about the possibility of him getting to hold her. When I had my camera ready, he was completely uninterested (probably because he was also seeing his cousin, Emma Jane, for the first time since Christmas...they were more interested in playing chase.) Then a couple days later, they stopped by Mom and Dad's house and my camera was upstairs when Ezra decided he wanted to hold Allie...and, of course, it was the sweetest thing ever. Allie was, naturally, sleeping and Ezra kept giving her gentle, sweet kisses and whispering, "I love you, Allie Jo....good night...have a good sleep, honey." So cute.

Ezra also had a fun day out with Poppio while we were there. Poppio got up early on a Saturday morning (not his favourite thing to do) and took Ezra to breakfast and then to a movie. They came home and ate some lunch and then he took Ezra to the playground. Fun times. While they were gone in the morning, I had a chance to teach a Zumba class in a space a friend of mine owns. We were only able to put it together at the last-minute so I only had three people show up, but it was still a lot of fun. Hope to be able to do it again next time I'm in town.

The Museum
Ezra and I got back into town on Monday. I worked on Tuesday and then on Wednesday we had a fun family outing to the National Museum of the U.S. Air Force in Dayton, OH. Michael has been before but it was when he was little. Ever since we moved here, Michael has been saying that we need to go. Michael was on Spring Break this week so we decided to do it. It is a really neat place. So many planes and so neat to be up close to all of them. Some we were even able to get into. I don't know even a quarter as much about planes as Michael does (he very nearly had his pilot's license!) but it was still cool to see it all. Ezra got a little worn out (it's a huge place) but it was well worth the trip. We got a little silly on some parts of our time there as you can see in some of the video footage I included below (the last part of the film is Ezra playing with his plane that he got at the museum gift shop in our front yard when we got home.)

In other news, we recently hopped on the Netflix bandwagon and are so glad we did! We discovered that they have all the seasons of The Cosby Show on instant play! That alone is worth the $10 per month. We have a new family ritual of watching one episode at night before Ezra goes to bed now. So fun to see that show again and share it with Ezra who laughs just as hard as we do.

The weather was insanely beautiful at the beginning of the week and it has taken a major nose-dive and probably won't be heading up for a little over a week! We are staying in today and preparing for our trip to Tennessee. We will leave tomorrow morning after I teach my classes at the Y.

If you're interested in seeing any pics from the above events, just check out this album.

Fun-filled Weekend

2011-03-09T11:32:00.000-08:00

So we had a big weekend. My mother and father (DRams & Poppio to Ezra) came to spend the weekend with us! We met them for dinner on Friday evening and then we all headed back to our place. Some of you may remember the following video I posted a couple posts back:

Well, DRams and Poppio remembered it and this is what happened:

Needless to say, he was delighted. We stayed up a little too late that night eating ice cream and watching Shutter Island with my dad (again, if you haven't seen it, go see it!) Didn't get to bed 'til one in the morning! Yipes! Particularly difficult since I had to be up at 7 in the morning! I made it work, though. Actually, my mother and father did too. They wanted to join me for the classes I teach down at the Central Parkway YMCA. While I taught Pilates, Dad was on an elliptical and mom was chilling out. They both joined in for Zumba after that, though! They both did a really great job. Lots of fun.

I got them home and then hung around a bit longer before I went to teach the other Zumba class I do on Saturdays at UC. Phew! After I got home, I took a much-needed shower and then all of us but Michael piled in the car and headed over to Newport Aquarium. This is one of our favourite places in the Cincinnati area. Ezra and I go about once a week. Although it was packed, we were delighted to share the experience with DRams and Poppio. We petted sea stars and horseshoe crabs, we ogled the octopus and jellyfishes, and we even petted some sharks. The following video (although a touch long) will give you a better idea of what our experience was like.

After the aquarium, we grabbed a bite to eat and then headed back home. Needless to say, we were worn out! We were in bed around 10pm. I had another early morning on Sunday because I sang at Crossroads in Mason. I had to leave the house at 6:15 (in the morning...) in order to be there by 7. Mason is Crossroads first satellite branch. I had never been there before and I was super impressed by all the work that goes into that place each weekend. It meets in Mason Middle School. There were volunteers there at 6 in the morning getting everything all set up. Pretty impressive. There were two services. Mom, Dad, Michael, & Ezra all came to the first one. Mom and Dad left afterward and Michael and I hung out in the atrium while Ezra played in Adventure Club during the second service until it was time for me to sing. After church, we grabbed some lunch at Skyline. Good times.

On Sunday afternoon, I introduced Ezra to Buster Keaton who is, in my book, far and away the best silent film comedian ever. Ezra was in stitches over this particular video (the videos are taken from YouTube which is why there are two of them -- two parts....)

Our week has been going well enough. School has been put on hold for a bit as our two other kids have been sick and, I have to admit, the break has been refreshing. We are, however, looking forward to getting back into it.

Ezra Reads!

2011-03-02T16:42:00.000-08:00

So, we've called school for the week. This nasty cold just seems to be bouncing around all over the place. It still won't let go of me, which is just a touch annoying. Fortunately, I'm only nasally congested which is good since I'm supposed to sing at church this weekend.

Had a long day of work yesterday. I had honestly been looking forward to just coming home and relaxing, but we had some friends hijack us and I'm really glad that they did. They just came on over, made dinner, and we had a really nice relaxed time. I'm so thankful for friends that I can sit around in my pj's with and just be myself. Such a blessing.

Today was a bit busier than I had hoped too. I'm trying to rest as much as possible. I did some needed cleaning up around here, then Ezra and I went grocery shopping and then went down to the library. (Oddly enough we ran into Marketing-Camera lady while we were there again! This is really odd because this is the HUGE downtown branch and she wasn't with her camera today...) We got our books and headed over to the school to do story time after about an hour and a half.

The real big news to share tonight is that Ezra has started reading! Super excited about this! He's reading 3 to 5 letter words. Here's a short video (he struggles with the first word but picks up steam...I promise he hadn't tried these words before...we're not shady like that...)

A Fog -- A Classic -- A Website

2011-02-28T09:02:00.000-08:00

This past weekend has been a bit of a fog for me. The Hutchins Three, to one degree or another, have been sick. Nothing too serious. Yucky colds for the most part. Ezra started really winding down on Wednesday, acting very lethargic, etc. I was fine but knew it would only be a matter of time since Ezra has been into giving lots of kisses lately. (How can I refuse his little pursed lips?) Thursday, Ezra was acting fine -- a squirrel on cocaine would actually be an apt description. It was like night and day. The only way I can explain it, is that God heard my (and many others') prayers on his behalf, and graciously brought him out of it. Friday is when things started going downhill for Michael and I. Michael was sniffly and I was just starting to feel rundown.

Anyway...I won't bore you with all the details. We've all had colds before and gotten over them, as, I'm sure (I hope) we will soon. Although, this hasn't always been the assumption. For generations long ago, a bad cold could take someone out. I only mention this because I was reminded of it while watching the last Masterpiece Theater Classic -- Downton Abbey. If you haven't seen it yet, you should. Good stuff.

In other news (much more encouraging news), Michael got new glasses. About a month ago, his broke during the vigorous cleaning he was giving them. I say that sarcastically. They basically crumbled in his hands and, I have to say, we weren't surprised. He has been wearing them since 2005 or 2006. I was recently told about a web-site called 39dollarglasses.com. I noticed that a friend of mine had on a new pair of glasses. I commented on them and he told me about the website. Of course, I was skeptical. "With prescription lenses and everything?" I asked, incredulously. "Yup. And if you don't like them, you can send them back for free," he replied, as if he had been reading from the script for the commercial. I stored this information away for exactly this moment. Michael and I hopped on the internet and went to the site. It was all true and, in the end, even better! For some crazy reason, they had a $15 dollar off coupon. Michael ordered two pairs of glasses. We ordered them separately so we could use the coupon twice and have one of the pairs shipped overnight. Even with overnight shipping, we only paid about $75 for both pairs of glasses! Isn't that crazy?! It's a pretty cool site. So, if you are an eyeglasses wearer, you need to check it out next time your glasses crumble. And here is a pic of Michael in one of his new pairs of glasses.

Library Paparazzi

2011-02-23T19:44:00.000-08:00

After school this morning, Ezra and I went to the library (does that put us in the running for "Biggest Nerds of the Year" awards yet?...geesh....if I had glasses, I'm pretty sure I would have pushed them up my nose...) I do a story time at a local elementary school for their after-school program and I'm always in need of fresh material. I had a load of stale material that I had to return and, wouldn't you know it, there was some sort person from the library's marketing department hanging out by the circulation desk with a camera.

"Um, I'm trying to get some photos of people checking out books. Would you mind posing for a few shots?" she asked us sheepishly.

"Sure," I chuckled, simply thrilled that I had decided to basically wear my pajamas out and about today....because it matters what you like, you know....eye roll....

Ezra, of course, was not interested in the least in smiling for the camera. I threatened him with tickles and used the whole, "Don't you smile...you better not smile..." bit with him. It worked out in the end.

Marketing-Camera gal squatted down to show Ezra the photos she had snapped. Ezra briefly noted the photos (heaven knows he's seen plenty of himself in the past...nothing new to him...) but then let his gaze settle on her lips. I noticed this. "What are those scraps on you?" he queried. For a moment, I thought I had made a mistake. Maybe, in actuality, he had been staring at her earrings which looked like, uh...scraps of metal? But then I put two and two together. Earlier in the car we had been trying to listen to a CD but it was skipping a lot. When Ezra asked me what the problem was I told him I thought the disc might have some scratches. "Why does it have scraps?" he asked me. Now let's go back to our conversation with M-C gal. After I remembered this earlier conversation, I then noticed the abundance of fine lines around her lips. "Scraps?" she asked me confused. "Scraps?" I asked Ezra, feigning confusion. "Yeah, on her lips!" he responded, quite exasperated that this woman, who just moments ago told him how precocious he was, wasn't quite able to keep up with him. Lying is not a habit of mine, but I confess that I lied today. "Huh. I have no idea what he's talking about!"

Click here and here to see the photos she took of us.

*************************************************************************************

Last week I was putting Ezra's pants on him.

"Man, your legs are getting long," I said. "Guess I shouldn't be surprised. I'm sure you got them from me. Do you know who else has long legs?" I asked him.

"Who?"

"Poppio (my father)," I told him. "He's the one who gave me my long legs."

"You can't give legs as gifts!" he exclaimed.

Red Sink

2011-02-21T18:29:00.000-08:00

There is a vintage, red ceramic, double-basin kitchen sink that has been living in my parents' basement since my senior year of high school. It belongs to me. I've always loved to go garage-sale-ing. I can remember as a child riding in the car with my mom on the way to a friend's home or a grocery store. During garage sale season, it was not uncommon for her to see a sale and pull over spontaneously. You never know what you may find. I can't remember any fantastic finds she may have made, but my mother passed her love of the hunt onto me and I've had some fun finds -- a scarf that I still wear (75 cents); an old military-type coat that I wore for a while ($1); a clarinet that needed a bit of love ($2). Most teenagers have much more glorious plans upon the procurement of their drivers licenses than I ever did. I was pretty thrilled by the thought that I got to go out garage-sale-ing on my own, if I wanted to. But one day I came back with a sink. It was a steal -- $10! I'm sure the original owners had not pictured a skinny high school girl as the buyer for this particular item but, what can I say? Despite the fact that I had no prospects of OWNING my own kitchen for AT LEAST another four or five years, I had a thing for vintage kitchen items. I had already purchased a 40s era cake server and bread box earlier in the season. Why stop there? Besides, my eyes could not resist the luster of the red. It was in fantastic condition and ceramic to boot. I had visions of my future kitchen. Everything would be black and white and then there would be that red sink.

"Mandi, what the heck are you gonna do with a sink?" I can hear my mother asking me in utter disbelief and bewilderment.

"I know this is the sink I want, Mom! I'll never find a deal like this again! How could I pass it up?"

And although she still shook her head and rolled her eyes at me, I know the garage sale-r inside of her understood. She told me I could store it in the basement until I got my own kitchen.

That was in 1998. That girl had no idea what life had in store for her. I don't own a kitchen yet. I never have and, honestly, I don't know if I ever will. Having spent my entire independent life renting (and hearing the woes of all of my home-owning friends -- ie. our furnace went out, we have to mow the lawn, our lawnmower broke), I've come to appreciate the benefits of it. What will become of that sink? I know that's a question my mother has asked countless times. That's a good question....and I'm not quite sure of the answer yet.

*************************************************************************************

We just got back to Cincinnati today after having spent the weekend with all of Michael's family in northwest Ohio. It was the first time that we all had been together in over three years. (Only one of our number was unable to be in attendance.) It was nice to catch up and meet children I had not met yet. We had a family photo taken which the kids were surprisingly fantastic for, given the fact that about half of the toddlers were sick with a fever and/or a cold.

It rained our entire drive home. Normally that wouldn't register with me but since I found out that our wiper transmission is broken the day that we left, that made the trip a bit more interesting. We did make it home without incident, though, around noon. Michael rushed off to school to teach his class and Ezra and I stayed in out of the rain. I was pretty pooped. I had unwittingly stayed up until about 1:30 in the morning (I honestly thought it was about 11:30 at the latest) and had to get up at 7 this morning. Despite my exhaustion, I was determined to get all of our stuff put away. I did several loads of laundry and got everything put away and then I sat down to play with Ezra while my last load finished up. He notified me that he was interested in purchasing a specific car from one of his favourite movies, Cars. His name is Ramone. I asked him how he planned on getting the money for the purchase and this is the conversation that followed (which is what I will leave you with):

The Main Events

2011-02-15T18:49:00.000-08:00

A hot pile of freshly-laundered sheets sits on the bed behind me. I decided I was ok with letting them sit there and get wrinkly so that I could blog. You stretch them out over a bed anyway and the last time someone inspected my sheets for wrinkles was...um...never...so...on with the post...

Turns out a lot can happen in a week around here (no surprise there...) Lots of big events, though, in this week, which would explain my blogging silence. One of my favourite events was my sister, Haley, and her husband, Hogey (as we affectionately call him...it's an abbreviation of his last name...nothing at all to do with the sandwich) came down from Kalamazoo, Michigan to spend the weekend with us! We had a blast! We ate out at one of our favourite joints on the river and enjoyed a beautiful sunset on Friday evening, on Saturday we churched it up and then made the obligatory Skyline and Graeter's stops, and then on Sunday we made it over to the Cincinnati Museum Center. It was a tearful goodbye. Ezra is starting to have a hard time with goodbyes these days so that doesn't help the situation. He's become attached to our family (which pleases me greatly!) and along with that comes the awareness of their absence. We made it, though.

After Haley and Hogey left, another big event took place. Ezra and I were busy making Valentine's for some special folks in his life and he did this for the first time. I was so proud of him. He wrote it out four times all by himself and let's just say that I was thankful we went with such a short name. Poor guy, it took him quite a while with much sticking out of his tongue and nervous giggling. He was proud too but when I asked him later if he wanted to do it again he very clearly told me, "No." Took a lot out of him apparently.

Ezra exchanged his Valentine's with his friends from school at a little party time we had in honour of the holiday. Michael and I were blessed by the fantastic toddler-sitting of our friend, Jamie, so that we could go out to celebrate Valentine's Day. We finally faced the music and admitted that we are no longer spring chickens so we made it an early night. We dined at Ambar India restaurant in Clifton, then walked down the block to Graeter's for a bit of dessert, and finally ended up another block down at the Esquire Theatre for the film The King's Speech which was a fantastic movie! I can highly recommend it and hope that you see it at some point. We made it home around 20 to 10 and got to bed at a decent time.

A real spanner of an event happened over the weekend that is still effecting me at the moment and brings me back to the opening of this post. Our washing machine broke on Sunday. Kind of a bummer when you've had guests the previous two days and your general policy is to not do any laundry on Saturdays if you can help it. We were told that someone would be out to fix it yesterday and it actually happened, so I have been doing laundry since I got home at 3 this afternoon. The last load is in the dryer now and I guess I better get to foldin'.....

full day...so far...

2011-02-09T12:17:00.000-08:00

this has been a full day already and it's only just halfway over....but it has been a good fullness.

took ezra to school at ms. bekah's this morning and i did my grocery shopping thang. when i used to do two school days a week, i took ezra grocery shopping with me just because that was the only way it would work with my schedule. now that i have two mornings each week when he's in school at someone else's home, i can go on my own. i love this...really i do. it's a much faster experience. however, i would be lying to you if i said that there are times when i'm in the store and i see a mom with her toddler and i'm a bit jealous. hey, i have one of those too...i say jealously...to myself....he has never been difficult in a store. in fact, i always enjoyed our conversations. there are always new sources of conversation in a grocery store for a toddler. as i said, the only reason it's a gift to do it on my own is that it takes about half the time.

stopped in the library after the store to drop off some books and pick up some new ones. i do an after-school story time on wednesday afternoons which means i need new books constantly.

on my way back to bekah's home, i noticed a barber-pole barbershop. (this is what i call them.) you know. the kind with just a few chairs and only men (typically.) this is the type of place i prefer to have ezra's hair cut. in these types of shops, there's no pussy-footin' around. no syrupy honey, could just sit still for a second followed by a nervous giggle, touching my child like he's going to break. in barber-pole barbershops, the barbers grab ezra's head and go to town and are done in about 15 minutes. they aren't concerned that i'm going to be angry if they're too rough with him. i actually prefer it if he's being difficult! i take ezra to a barber-pole barbershop in my parents' town of Three Rivers, Michigan. Doug the barber. My dad has gone to him for a really long time and my brother has also. Doug has one chair in his shop. There is a partition set up and on the other side of it is another chair and two hair-drying seats. This is where his wife, Kathy, does ladies' hair. They have been together, doing hair since the 50s! It's a great place! Usually, we make it up to see my parents often enough to get ezra's hair cut on a regular (-enough) basis. But, we haven't been back in a bit and we have a big photo experience coming up next weekend and ezra was starting to look a little rough around the edges. i was just getting ready to post on facebook asking my cincinnati friends to direct me to the nearest barber-pole barbershop and then i drove by this place today. the name of the place is mariemont barber shop. i thought i might take ezra back there. but i've never taken him to a haircut on a whim. usually we're giving him the pep-talk the whole day before. i thought i'd give it a whirl. i picked him up and we drove back. fortunately, they let us just walk in (although they prefer appointments...someone, fortunately for us, had just canceled.) there are four chairs in the shop and two guys were there today, brian and lucky eugene. brian cut ezra's hair and both of them did a fantastic job! i didn't hear a peep out of ezra. he was so taken with the whole shop. lots of old pictures of cincinnati from the 40s hanging up everywhere. a cool coffee maker that looked like a rocket ship (at least to him...) a red umbrella. we were literally in and out in 15 minutes and it set me back $11.50 (plus a tip.) we will definitely be heading back.

ezra grabbed a cup of m&m's on the way out and then we headed to catch the shuttle to uc. i recently purchased a three-month pass to the rec. center on campus for ezra so that i could take him swimming on a regular basis. we hopped on the shuttle (which was manned by an older white male with a thick accent...couldn't quite place it...this will matter in a moment...) and got to campus in 15 minutes. ezra likes to get inside the lockers while i'm getting our stuff together. locker rooms with a 3.5 year old always make for good conversations. plenty of observations are made (as you can imagine...) no matter how much discretion is taken. in the pool today, we played tortoise and the hare. i was the hare (naturally...i always smoke ezra in races...) and i would pretend to fall asleep and ezra (the tortoise) would pass me at which point i would wake up, incensed, and cream him anyway....just kidding. it is a very neat pool. there is a small circular part which is a little whirlpool. we like to pretend we are being swept away in a mighty river so, naturally, there is much reaching-out of hands in desperation. there is also a lazy river. this is where i get my workout. i let ezra hang onto one of my feet and then swim along with him. when we get to the other side, he switches feet. after our swim, in the locker room, ezra was chatting up one of the other gals. she had a pair of headphones and ezra asked where she had got them. "oh, my sister gave them to me," she told him. "you said thanks?" ezra asked. she laughed and told him that she had thanked her. then she told him goodbye. "thanks for talking to me!" ezra called after her. he makes me smile a lot. after we got ourselves together, we headed out to the shuttle. ezra gasped. "how did the man change?! he must be magic!" the driver this time, was a much younger black male.

so there we are. this evening, i'm heading out with a friend to see the film rabbit hole. really looking forward to that. the film looks pretty intense...i'll let you know how i handle it....

so...

2011-02-07T18:56:00.000-08:00

...i've been crocheting a lot lately. (how's that for a comeback after a three-month hiatus?) really, i have. i really like doing it. i love the sense of accomplishment i feel after making something wearable with my own two hands.

of course, our trio has been up to lots more than my bouts of crocheting but, so has everyone else in the world, so what else is new? these past few months were busy not with just the holidays but life as well. i haven't blogged in so long for one of two reasons: i either didn't have the time or i just wanted to crochet more. honestly, i have been battling the control i felt the blog was exerting over me for a period. mandi, you haven't blogged in a while *guilt, guilt, guilt*....so....i don't wanna blog out of guilt...go grab your hook and yarn....*sigh, sigh, sigh, produce, produce, produce, intense sense of accomplishment*......

for those of you who are interested, things are pretty much the same around here. still working lots, still home-schooling ezra with the group (which has really been fantastic, particularly since we each decided to take 1 of the 3 days of the week that we meet -- i had been doing two of them), still job-hunting, and dissertating (yes...i made up that last word...) in some interesting and fun news, michael has been nominated for an outstanding doctoral dissertation award of sorts at UC. that's just a bit of a nutshell for you.

here's a segue for you: i recently purchased year passes to the newport aquarium for ezra and i. i LOVE that place. if you live in the area and have never been, you really need to go, particularly if you can go on a weekday. it is such an amazingly peaceful place not to mention the fantastic creatures that live there. ezra and i try to go once a week and today was our day. before we went, though, we had lunch out. this is not typical for us not only because our budget doesn't typically allow for this type of thing, but because my child eats like a bird so it's extremely difficult to justify. this was a very intentional lunch for him and me, though. over the past couple weeks whenever we have driven by one of these ezra has cried out in desperation, "i really wish we could eat at a shiny star chilies!" honestly, i really believe that it's just the appeal of the sign for him because the last time we at at one was when he was about 18 months old so i'm fairly certain he has no memory of it. i have always chuckled as i responded, "well, we'll go sometime ezra. don't worry." well, apparently, too much time had passed for him the other night as we were on our way home from church because he burst out into tears (granted, he was pretty darn tired, but...) "mom! when are we going to shiny star chilies?! you said we would!" so, on saturday evening, i told him i would take him in two more sleeps (monday.) this seemed to satisfy him. i wish i could have been recording him as we pulled up to the restaurant today. you would have thought we were pulling into the magic kingdom itself. he pointed out every "shiny star" logo he saw and squealed with delight. i had a coupon for a buy one 3-way get the second free. my little bird ate more than half of a regular! i, for one, loved pleasing him so easily. the manager even gave ezra his own "shiny star" commemorative glass AND i splurged for a milkshake on the way out. he was one happy camper.

upon arriving at the aquarium, we found out that we were just in time for the shark feeding. we hustled our buns over to the appropriate tank and i'm really glad we did. it was really a cool thing to see and we found out that it's something they do only once a week! according to the aquarium biologists, sharks can go a long time without eating.

so, there's a little blurb from our day. i thought, at the end, i would post the holiday update i sent out through facebook shortly before christmas. some folks told me they didn't receive it or just didn't realize it was attached to the photo i sent out on top of it. so, if you're interested, read on. if not, have a nice night.

************************************************************************************

So, I'd love to tell you all that we are sending our holiday family greeting through Facebook because we've decided to "go green" this year. While that is part of the motivation for our electronic greeting, I have to admit it's motivated primarily by our "no green" situation
this year. But...let's not start this update talking about money....(we'll save that for later on in the update where you will find a link that will allow you to donate...TOTALLY kidding...)

For those of you who have been following our blog (which has not been updated in the past three weeks or so...oops...) you basically already know what's up with us....feel free to continue reading. This will be one heck of a nutshell. For those of you who haven't, by all means, continue reading but please know that in order to fill in the gaping holes, you will need to check out the blog which can be found at http://mmhutchins.blogspot.com/.

Anywho....this year has been, by far, the craziest year of our lives. We started it out in Germany, came back to the States for a month in Michigan and Ohio with family, and finally settled back into Cincinnati for the remainder. We had hopes that last year Michael might be able to
secure a teaching position at a university for fall of this year, but that was not in the plan, apparently. So, we didn't know we would be coming back to Cincinnati until around spring. Cincinnati was the obvious choice as Michael had one year of funding left at the university
there.

Germany was great. We are so thankful that we had that experience. We made many friends there and learned so much about ourselves on so many different levels. Looking back, though, when we find ourselves missing our time there it's not so much Germany that we miss (although we do) but the abundance of time we had together as a family. I was legally not allowed to work outside of the home. Michael worked 9 to 5 in the archive and then our evenings and weekends were spent together as a family. Just simple living. Eating together every night, going for walks, making play dough, and playing in the snow. Yes, we saw new cities and old buildings, ate new food and walked our butts off, but we did it all together and, as cheesy as that sounds, I, for one, am thankful that I am part of a family (as small as it is) that I just love to be with. Thankfully, because of video that we took, Ezra does remember our time there and always asks if we can go back because he wants a pretzel. We think fondly of a time when we will get to go back to Germany or any new place for that matter. It seems to be part of who we are. We have realized that life is just too short to only experience one set of scenery.

Thanks to a dear, trustworthy friend of ours, we were able to secure a fantastic apartment in Cincinnati while still living in Germany. We went through Craigslist and I was so glad when the hunt was over because I was getting sick of looking at that site! I am convinced that the
securing of our apartment was completely a God-thing. Our friend just happened to be in the right place at the right time as we had sent him to look at an apartment down the street from the one we are in now. After leaving the place, he happened to bump into the landlord who just
happened to be putting the sign in the yard advertising our place at that exact moment. We were the first and only people to look at the place. Our landlords are fantastic people and we love our neighborhood which is situated right on the edge of Eden Park (Cincinnati's version of Central Park.) There are many advantages to moving back to a place -- a ready-made community of friends, a fantastic church, former employers eager to hire you. I am working for Gymboree Play & Music, YMCA, Cincinnati Recreation Commission, and UC (about 20 to 30 hours a week total.) We already knew all the ins and outs of the city. These advantages, however, are harder to fully appreciate when the great possibility of moving away from all of it again looms in the not-too-distant future. We have so enjoyed spending time with our close friends and engaging in our church community again but it is very painful to think that we will, quite probably, have to say goodbye again.

As of now, there is a big blank for the Hutchins Three after May. Michael will defend his dissertation in the spring and finally be done with his Ph.D. The University of Cincinnati has equipped Michael well but we would be lying if we said we weren't a little nervous these
days. He is officially on the market again, attempting to get a teaching position at a university for the fall of 2011. Back when Michael first started his graduate career (Fall of 2004!) we had very
little concern that he would have difficulty finding a job when he finished as UC had a 99% work placement rate for their graduate students upon completion of their studies at that time. These days things are a bit different. It seems that the American University no longer values language studies (some major universities even going so far as to eliminate their modern language programs altogether -- even Spanish, for crying out loud!) Michael has sent out resumes for around 30 positions that are available this coming fall...and so have hundreds of other people. While we would love to say that we are keeping our eyes on the prize and completely un-phased by the odds (Michael does have a very impressive graduate student resume, after all -- a Taft and a Fulbright!), honestly most days are spent in fervent prayer and long discussions about the what-ifs. God has forced us (Michael most of all) to take a long, hard, painful look at how we identify ourselves. It has been Michael's passion for a very long time to be teaching in a
university environment but, what if that doesn't happen right away? What if it didn't happen ever? That may seem extreme, but what if? That is a really tough question that we have been wrestling with. I keep saying "we" because this has not only been a long road for Michael. Yes, he has been doing all the school work but I have been doing a lot of supporting work. I say that in no way to toot my horn; only to say that it would be just as devastatingly difficult for me as well if things didn't turn out as we had thought they would. Michael is scheduled to go to a mass hiring conference for the Modern Language Association in the beginning of January. As of now, there is no word back from any place he has applied. Some days are better than others. We can confidently ask God to bless Michael with the opportunity he's been working so hard to get and praise Him for the opportunities He's allowed us to have. We laugh and sing and have a general good time as is our Hutchins way as we live in the moment (another big lesson God has been teaching this super-planner who tends to spend more time in the future...at least in her mind...) But then there are the days when we are just sick of it all and bone-weary. These are the days when our conversations with God swing in the opposite direction entirely, if they happen at all. We cry, demand, beg, plead, and yell at Him. We furrow our brows, snap, hunch, rush, and ignore each other. These are bleak days. I share these moments with you because one too many Holiday Updates is sent out with the intention of projecting the perfect image of the perfect family who has it all perfectly together...thank you very much. Well, as many of you already know, even if you had never read this update, we are not the perfect family because despite God's grace, we are still imperfect people. What keeps me going at the end of the day (yes, even the bone-weary ones) is love. It helps me to put things in perspective. God is bringing us through these experiences, I have to believe, so that we can love Him and others more effectively. I have
empathy now for mothers who have to work a lot outside of the home (something I NEVER thought I would do), we have empathy for people who are poor, we have empathy for people who have crumby health insurance or none at all. Some days I come home after a long day spent outside of the home working and am discouraged that another day has gone by that my family was unable to sit down together for a meal, but it's in those moments that God reminds me how much of a luxury that is for a vast majority of the citizens of the earth and some of them don't even have the food to make the meal! At the end of the day, we are truly blessed. I am on this life journey with people I truly love, we have beds to sleep in, a home to heat and cool, food to eat, a reliable car, and flexible jobs that allow Ezra to be with one of us when the other is
working. Pray for us. Pray we'll keep the proper perspective. Pray that God will bless Michael with a job.

This update has gotten long and I haven't even elaborated on the joy and learning experience it is to parent our son, Ezra. He is alert, observant, keeps us on our toes, repeats everything we say, loves to sing loud and hard, and is starting to sound out three-letter words. Depending on when, where, and in what attitude he's doing them, all of those things can be good or bad. He eats like a bird but we've been told that's not uncommon for a 3 1/2 year old. Guess it's better than
the other end of the spectrum. We've also been part of a home-school preschool group that meets for 2 hours 3 days a week. Two other children are in the group and it has been a really great experience. The conversations we're able to have with him are so interesting. It's been fun this Advent season to talk about the birth of Jesus. Everyday Ezra opens his Advent calendar to find a small candy and a piece of paper. "Why was Jesus born?" "What is sin?" "Who sins?" "What's a savior?" These simple questions can lead to fantastic conversations (or sometimes just a quick answer -- "Jesus" "God" "the Bible" -- and a gobbled piece of candy). We're thankful for a black and white presence in our home. Ezra has no idea how easily he can put things in
perspective for us these days.

How can we encourage you this holiday season? Look for opportunities to love. For those of us who call ourselves Christ-followers, this is God because He is, after all, love. For those of you who don't, whether you want it or not, part of you is loving. I believe it's how we all bear the image of our creator. Love is a choice and not always an easy one to make because it requires us to take the focus off of ourselves and put it on someone else. Choose love.

...and for those of you who celebrate it, Merry Christmas.

Lots....

2010-11-21T08:24:00.000-08:00

....that's what we've been up to...but I refuse to report on the busy-ness of life....that's an old song that's been sung one too many times on this ol' blog....Instead, I will tell of the fun highlights. It's been two weeks since last I wrote, so there are many.

The weather has been interesting here. Swinging between extremes, hot then cold. Two weeks ago we were in a hot spell and we decided to hit the zoo with our preschool group. It's always fun to watch the kids together. Here they are on the train:

We took another field trip this week and this time it was cold. We were talking about the soft "C" sound in school (as in "city") and we decided to ride a metro bus downtown and go to the top of Carew Tower to see our city of Cincinnati (another soft "C"). It was a lot of fun. After we came down from our tower, we ate some lunch and then got some Graeter's ice cream on Fountain Square. They have cinnamon and pumpkin spice flavors for the season now! I was pretty stoked and, yes, I did get two scoops. Here's a very brief video of our wait for the bus and walking the streets with the kids:

Yesterday was a very big and busy day. I made the decision to go ahead and put up our Christmas tree. I hesitate to elaborate on the busy-ness in our lives that required me to do this so early because I said I would not go there but, I will be brief. I normally wait 'til after Thanksgiving to perform this ritual but there literally are very few free moments in our day (at least enough in chunks together to make enough time to put up a tree at a relaxed pace.) We will hit the ground running when we get back from our Thanksgiving travels so I took advantage of the free Saturday before to put it up. This means that I had to head to our storage unit after I taught my classes at the Y yesterday morning. I have never gone to the storage unit by myself. We have a small unit at the local U-Haul place (like 2 blocks from our home so, quite convenient) but the kicker is that it's on the second level. I don't mean it's on the second floor of the building. I mean there are two rows of small storage units in the walls and we are on the top row or level. You have to use a stair ladder to access it and the space is not tall enough for an adult to stand completely upright in. There is enough space on the top platform of the ladder to place about one box but if you're there by yourself, and what you need is in the back of your unit, you go up and down the narrow steps of the ladder a lot. Usually it works best with two people: one at the top handing things down to the person on the ground. But, Michael was at home baking and taking care of Ezra (who couldn't come because I needed to take his car seat out of the back in order to have enough space for our holiday decorations.) So, I arrived, got the ladder, and headed up. I really wonder how many people actually fall out of these units every year. It would not be difficult to do at all. Let's just say I was VERY careful but I had to carry some pretty heavy boxes down that precarious ladder and I had my pink rubber boots on....not the most thoughtful footwear...There were two containers I was looking for. The first was right up front. So, that worked out, however the other (and much bigger) container was in the back and under several items. I am pleased to say that I was successful and felt really proud of myself after I finished. I was not prepared to carry those containers up the 4 flights of stairs to our home, however. I figured Michael would probably want to share in my same sense of accomplishment, so I let him do that job. The tree was up within about an hour and a half and I love it. I always like when trees can be in a front window of a home and we are able to do that with our place. Here's what it looks like.

I ran into our upstairs neighbor in the street when Ezra and I got home on Friday evening. He warned us that a large event called Balluminaria would be taking place on Saturday evening. I say "warned" because whenever a large event takes place in Eden Park, all the parking spots on our street are very quickly taken up, so people try to save spaces or just decide to stay home all day. I was intrigued by the event he was talking about. He mentioned that hot air balloons would be involved. So, I went upstairs and Googled it. I learned that every year for the past 15 years the Balluminaria event has been taking place. About 12 hot air balloons gather at the far end of Mirror Lake in Eden Park at dusk and on the count of three light up their burners. The effect is a beautiful reflection off of the pond which explains the hundreds of cameras that show up every year. Normally we go to church on Saturday evenings from 4pm to 6pm but we just couldn't pass this up. We decided to break our own "stay at home in your pj's all day on Sunday" rule in order to get up and go to church in the morning instead. Michael was still too busy baking so Ezra and I headed out. Didn't have to give up our parking space since we live in the park! I was a little disappointed at first, though. The path we take through the park to get to Mirror Lake is through a wooded area. When you emerge from the woods, you see Mirror Lake. I expected to be faced with the huge balloons. But nothing was there but people and some funnel cake vendors. I happened to run into a mom from Gymboree and she told me that the balloons were being prepared to be inflated. So, we had to wait around for a bit. We made use of the time by visiting a small petting zoo that was set up, waiting in line to get a balloon animal from a clown, playing with the video camera. I let Ezra use it and here is the film he created:

Hey, at least he understands the concept of pointing the camera at what he wants to film now. Around 5pm they started inflating the balloons. It wasn't until 5:30pm that they started lighting them up. It was getting pretty chilly but it was worth the wait. See for yourself:

Ezra and I made it home with enough time to help set up for the last big event of our day: Inverse Thanksgiving -- the reason Michael was baking most of the day. Maybe some of you have seen the ridiculous "Turkey Cake" link that has been shared on Facebook over the past week or so. Well, we have been meeting regularly with some friends on Saturday evenings and I was telling them about this seemingly disgusting dish. We all had a good laugh about it and then Gabe, one of our merry band, laughingly suggested that it would be funny to actually make desserts that looked like Thanksgiving entrees and side dishes and eat them during the "main course" and then eat the Turkey cake for "dessert". And Inverse Thanksgiving was born. Everybody pitched in. Michael made some cake that was shaped like a turkey (quite an artistic feat), our friend, Wes, made a marshmallow and jello dish that looked like mashed potatos complete with a gravy boat filled with butterscotch sauce, I used pumpkin pie filling to look like sweet potatos and then we used the left-over cake that Michael didn't need to make some stuffing. Our dear friend, John, took on the tremendous challenge of the Turkey Cake (not to be confused with the Cake Turkey from earlier...) Unfortunately, the cake started slipping on his ride over to our home where the feast was scheduled to take place but we all washed our hands and pushed the cake back together before John put the marshmallows on top of the sweet potato topping and put it in the broiler. The table was set for our "main course" and after the obligatory Rockwell shot, we sat down to eat. We were quite moderate since we all wanted to save room for "dessert". We couldn't help but crack jokes and giggle and snort as we ate. How lucky are we that we have friends who would actually do something as ridiculous as this with us? I love our friends. Finally, we cleared away our dinner plates and got out our "dessert" plates. In case you're wondering, the Turkey Cake is FANTASTIC! All of the ingredients are made from scratch (even the cranberry sauce) and it was just downright delicious. You know you want to make it now. Do it, do it, do it, do it......We had a blast and I'm pretty sure we may have a new tradition. Here are some video highlights:

This morning was the collection day for the Thanksgiving food drive at Crossroads. Every year we collect meals for families in Cincinnati and collect food to send over to our friends at Charity and Faith in Mamelodi, South Africa. This year we collected 250,000 meals! Awesome! I may have mentioned recently that our church has also been on a money-raising campaign. There are several big projects we want to spear-head and they require more money than the regular giving. The minimum amount required to press the "go" button is $30 million. Last week we made our commitments (which will be made over a three-year period.) This week Brian told us that our community committed $46 million. Crossroads has about 11,000 members. I LOVE this community. Here are some highlights from church this morning:

To see pics of all of the above just click here.

Hope everyone has a FANTASTIC Thanksgiving. Relax. Be thankful. Enjoy the time with your family.

Halloween Weekend, A New Kind of Busy, a Priceless Ezra Funny, and Famous

2010-11-07T10:55:00.000-08:00

So, Halloween happened. It was lots of fun. We were able to make it up to my parents' home for the occasion. Ever since Ezra was born, we've tried to work it out so that Halloween weekend would be spent with them. They have a great neighborhood for Trick-or-Treat. It hasn't worked out 'til this year. We really pushed hard to work it out this year since we have no idea where we will be next year. It's also cool that all my family is in the same place so Ezra was able to Trick-or-Treat with his cousin, Emma Jane. Ezra was an authentic cowboy and Emma Jane was a dalmatian. They did a great job and got lots of candy (to share with us...) Ezra would approach a door and say, "Trick-or-Treat!" The person would give him his candy after the obligatory what-a-cute-cowboy! exclamations, Ezra would say, "Thank you!" and then, with no prompting whatsoever from us, he would raise his hat in the air and yell out, "Yee-Haw!" So fun.

There were a couple other highlights from the weekend there besides Trick-or-Treat. My sister and I met up at the Goodwill in my parents' town of Three Rivers on Saturday. It happened to be Super Saturday (everything was 50% off!) and I made some great finds! I found this FANTASTIC coat with fur detail for $5! and I also found this REAL pair of Hush Puppies Blue Suede shoes in immaculate condition for $1.50! I LOVE great finds and Goodwill at second-hand stores and, for some odd reason, the one in my parents' town is simply rife with them!

The other major highlight of the weekend was Doughnut Day! The grandmother of my dear friend, Esther, has been hosting this event for several years now. She wakes up between 3 and 4 in the morning and starts making homemade doughnuts -- between 800 and 1,000 of them! And these aren't just plain, old cake doughnuts (although she does have some of those and they tend to be my favourite....) No, she has doughnuts iced in all manner of icing, doughnuts with coconut and nuts and sprinkles on them. It is amazing! And, of course, she serves all of them with apple cider. As I said, she started the tradition years ago. She lives in the small town of Constantine and she used to the be postal lady. One year, she decided to invite all the folks on her route over for a gathering and that's when Doughnut Day was born. Esther called us up and invited us over. It was fantastic! Everybody was so friendly and, of course, the doughnuts were INCREDIBLE! Esther's grandfather has a saw mill and so she took us out there for the primary purpose of letting Ezra see the tractor and to show him a HUGE pumpkin they had purchased and hollowed out that small children could fit inside. It was really nice to see Esther again and to share this cool experience with her. Also, she had never met Ezra before so it was cool for Ezra to get to meet her.

Michael had a huge personal highlight while we were at my parents' home. Of course, things are not always fun and games for him because of his work. He committed to working most of the day on the Friday and Saturday that we were there and because of this, he was able to get most of his resumes/CV's sent off to the nearly 25 positions for which is he is applying for work next year. That was a big relief. Now it's just a matter of praying and waiting. About half of the positions are tenure-track. The other half are visiting or one-year positions. I am pulling for a tenure-track. We'll see....

We got back home from our trip this past Monday and that's when a whole new sort of busy started for the Hutchins' family. I believe I mentioned in my last post that I have obtained a position with the Cincinnati Recreation Commission (a title that, to me, communicates: "Hey! We are serious about having fun, folks!") I don't believe I mentioned the title of my position, though. Officially, I am a Recreation Specialisit. So, if you're not sure how to have a good time, just call me. Anyway....this was the first week that I taught most of my new classes in that role. Not to mention the new classes I started teaching at UC (don't worry...I didn't acquire my Ph.D. overnight and become a faculty member....they are fitness classes...) So, this is what the week looks like for the Hutchins' now. Keep in mind that any time I am working (with the exception of one class) Ezra is with Michael who works on his dissertation and teaches whenever I'm not working.

Monday:
9am to 11am: Preschool at my home
6pm to 7pm: Kickboxing

Tuesday:
9:45am to 2:30pm: Gymboree Play & Music
4:15pm to 5pm: Kickboxing for 5 to 12 year olds for an after-school program
5:45pm to 7:15pm: 2 Zumba classes at UC

Wednesday:
9am to 11am: Preschool at my home
2:30pm to 3:30pm: Improv Comedy Workshop for Senior Citizens
4:30pm to 5:30pm: Storytime for 5 to 8 year olds for an after-school program

Thursday:
10:15am to 2:30pm: Gymboree Play & Music
5:30pm to 6:30pm: Zumba class at YMCA

Friday:
9:45am to 10:30am: Mommy Baby Fitness Class (Ezra is at preschool at a friends home during this time)
4:30pm to 5:30pm: Theatre Games Class for 8 to 12 year olds for an after-school program

Saturday:
8:15am to 10:30am: Pilates class and Zumba class at YMCA
4:30pm to 5:30pm: Crossroads

Sunday:
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

I am not necessarily pleased with the fact that we are this busy but, unfortunately, our budget is demanding that I work. I try not to think about the time I wish I could spend just grocery shopping leisurely with Ezra or keeping my home clean the way that I like it or cooking a fantastic dinner every night. Instead I am trying to be thankful for the fact that I have not only the opportunities for work but work that allows both Michael and I to have a flexible enough schedule so that Ezra is always able to be with one or the other of us. We are very blessed. I was realizing how very blessed I am as I sat and watched video footage of a team our church sends to do justice work in Calcutta. Millions of children have been and continue to be sold into sex slavery there and our team works with local authorities in an attempt to cut the head off of this ugly beast. The video footage showed little boys Ezra's age living in complete filth and squalor -- trash piled in the streets that raw sewage was streaming down. Of course, I couldn't help but think of Ezra and even if those children don't know any better, I'm pretty sure their mother's do. In the car on the way home, I had a conversation with Ezra:

"You know what, Ezra..."

"What?"

"I love you VERY much."

Now, we've had conversations like this quite often. Please do not think that I don't tell Ezra that I love him on a regular basis. Trust me...he knows how I feel about him. Usually, though, the conversation ends with him saying, "I love you too, Mommy." But not this time.

"How do you love me?" he asked.

"Well, I show you I love you in obvious ways by giving you hugs and kisses and cuddling with you (whenever you'll let me...the voice in my head chimed in...) But, I also show you I love you by working at a job so I can get money to make sure you have not only the things you need like food and clothes and a place to live but also so I can give you fun things like toys."

"And......" he chirped, "if I DON'T get them, I forget!"

Oh my....Michael and I just about lost it.

Another interesting note on work, though. The local Fox news affiliate contacted my employer at Gymboree Play & Music and told him they were interested in filming live from a play class that we have on Friday mornings at 9am. The program is a morning show type deal. Apparently the primary audience is mothers. My employer asked if I would like to teach the class, even though I don't usually teach it! I was VERY honored and, of course, said that I would LOVE to. So, this coming Friday, if you happen to live in the Cincinnati area, tune into Fox 19 between 9 and 10am and you just may see and hear me playing and singing with the kiddos. Fun Times!

To see photos of our fun Halloween weekend, just click here!

A Visit with a Friend, Time with Family, Bike, Rec.'d, A Surprise Visit, Party, & Listening

2010-10-24T13:23:00.000-07:00

A lot has happened in the past couple weeks. We had a friend come over last weekend for a conference held at UC. We met her while we were in Germany. She is at school in Nashville and we told her in Germany that she should submit a paper for the conference and that way she could come visit us! Well it worked out. Unfortunately, we had to be gone all of Saturday for a funeral. Our friend was at the conference most of the day on Saturday so we didn't miss much of each other. It was nice to see our friend.

It was also nice to see some family even though we had to see them at a funeral. Ezra was able to play with his cousin, Audrey. We spent a large portion of the afternoon just sitting around and chatting with family. Nice to catch up. After the memorial service, we grabbed a bite to eat with Michael's parents and some of his sisters.

I have been riding a bike. My mother brought hers to me when she came a couple weeks ago. I have wanted to get one but just have not had the time (or the resources) to go out shopping for one. I am pleased to say that it has gotten a lot of use and I REALLY appreciate her bringing it to me. I have been riding it to and from work on Tuesdays and Thursdays. It's a perfect ride. On the way, it's all downhill. That means, however, that the ride home is all uphill. Great workout! I do, admittedly, have to walk the bike halfway up one of the hills since you'd basically have to be Lance Armstrong to ride up it all the way. Geesh! It's great to get to use Ezra's trailer again. We rode over to the zoo last week and we've made it over to the University for a visit to Michael and some work-related stuff. I love when I get to the end of the day and I realize that the car has not been turned on once!

I have recently acquired a small position with the Cincinnati Recreation Commission. I will be doing a number of odd jobs for them -- a Theatre Games class for an after-school program a couple days a week, a Kickboxing class for adults, and an Improv Comedy class for senior citizens, just to name a few. My boss wanted to do a couple free Kickboxing demos to get people interested in signing up for the class so he scheduled a couple. The first one was scheduled for Tuesday at a local elementary school. I was told I could bring Ezra with me because they would have childcare there. So, Ezra and I arrived on time and were told things were going to be a bit different than we had originally planned. An announcement about this demo was supposed to go out in the monthly parent newsletter associated with the school inviting the parents to come try it out. Unfortunately, the announcement failed to go out and the normally scheduled after-school program for 5 to 12-year olds was still on the calendar. They usually utilize the gymnasium (which is where we had planned on doing the demo) so my boss asked if I'd be interested in trying to do a class for them. Just another one of the ridiculous situations that I seem to walk myself into sometimes. I figured, "Hey, if you're willing to pay me for my time, let's give it a shot!" I had a blast! The kids were cracking me up! They did a great job! I even had one scrawny kid who kept saying, "Awwww....this is a piece of chocolate cake! I'm not tired!" He's the same one who did all of his push-ups with one arm! Hilarious. And if you're wondering what Ezra did in the meantime....I asked him if he wanted to stay and do kickboxing or go down to the lunchroom with the mass of other kids not participating in the kickboxing experience. He chose the latter since the lunchroom had legos to play with.

My father surprised us on Wednesday evening with a visit! It was such a pleasant surprise. His work will often bring him down to our area and if he can, he stays with us. It was really nice to just spend a relaxing evening with him. He left the next morning as I left for work.

This past week, Michael and Ezra made a visit to The Fire Museum of Greater Cincinnati. Their tagline goes something like, "The only museum that could save your life!" Ha! Michael and Ezra had a fun time. Here's a short video of their visit:

Last night we had a Halloween party at our home. Lots of prep work but definitely fun times. We had about 15 people show up and had lots of good food and a really nice time.

So, for some reason, this week, I've been struggling with our unknown future more than usual. I'm pretty sure it has everything to do with the fact that Crossroads is starting a 3-year campaign process. The series we're in is talking about what the next three years are going to look like for the Crossroads community. I've been having a hard time with this. Of course, I find myself often thinking, "Why should I bother? Odds are we're going to be moving not long after May anyway." Not because I don't want to engage in this fantastic community. Trust me....I want nothing more than that with every fiber of my being but being at church lately has mostly been a very bittersweet experience for me. I'm really trying not to live in the future but having this big blank after May is making it very difficult for me to not hold everything at arm's length. I'm tired of longing for something that is 99% impossible. So, in order to cope with the future pain, I want to keep a respectful distance. We talked today about listening for God's voice. I've been trying to listen and hear what it is I'm supposed to be learning from this experience. The only thing I am coming away with so far is that maybe I'm putting my faith in my community. We talked last week about surrendering everything to God. Michael and I talked about what it would look like and mean to surrender career, family, possessions, ourselves but my community never occurred to me. I LOVE the people I am in community with here as much as I love my own flesh and blood family. I know that God wants us to be in healthy community but not at the expense of our complete and total dependency on Him. Sometimes I wonder if I put them above Him. If I run to them before I run to Him. Not sure if that's what He's trying to tell me. I just want to have some peace about all this and stop thinking so much about it. If this is what He's saying to me, I pray that I get it and that my heart won't have to break too much in the growing/learning process.

School Time, A Visit, Time with Friends, A Good Boy, and Some Rambly Thoughts

2010-10-10T09:02:00.000-07:00

So, I have blogged at length about my desire to do some sort of formal preschool experience with Ezra (and possibly some other children) at home. Well, I got the ball rolling on that this past week. On Wednesday, I met a friend (and her girls) at Joseph-Beth for storytime with Ezra. She is also interested in having the same sort of experience. So, I invited her over for mine and Ezra's Friday morning preschool time just so she could get an idea as to what types of things we're doing. I have another friend who is also interested, so I invited her over as well. Everyone agreed to come so Friday morning we made for quite a crowd in the living room. Rebekah came with her two daughters -- Keira, 4, and Kasie, 20 months -- and Melissa came with her two sons -- Henry, 4, and Elijah, 10 months -- and her sister, who was visiting from out of town. The older kids started off playing with playdough and then we officially started our school time. We sang a hello song and then got out a calendar of the month and sang a calendar song. Then we went over and fed Fred George. Everybody got to put some food in his bowl. After that, we had circle time. Just a time for the kids to share about something they brought -- show and tell, if you will. Then we played a game called command cards. I held up some one-word commands (hop twist, spin, etc.) and said them and the kids did them. The hope is that they will begin to recognize the word by sight. Then it was open time. The kids got to pick some things they wanted to do. It was really great. Ezra and I both had a really fun time. Sounds like it's something we are going to keep up. I will take the kids on Mondays and Wednesdays and then all the kids will alternate every other Friday between Mel's and Bekah's home. I'm really excited to see this actually happening! Here is a little video of just Ezra at school the other day:

Taught my first Zumba class at Williams YMCA on Thursday evening. It's from 5:30pm to 6:30pm. I had two ladies show up. We had fun! Hoping more will show up!

Friday we had a nice dinner/party time with the small group we were with previous to moving to Germany. During the evening, my mother showed up (not unexpectedly) from Michigan. She decided to come down and visit us for a night much to Ezra's great delight! Dinner was fun and we had s'mores afterward at the firepit outside! Afterward, we headed home. We were all beat. We stayed up chatting a bit and then headed to bed. Mom came to my Zumba class the next morning. I had two folks show up for Pilates and three (not including my mom...she won't be coming every week, after all...) for the Zumba class. I was really encouraged. We had a TON of fun in the Zumba class because the folks who showed up had so much fun! We sweat so much my eyeballs were stinging! Love it! Anyway...after that, Mom and I headed home where, after a much-needed shower, we picked up Ezra and headed down to Findlay Market. Mom wanted some goetta and we wanted to get some lunch. We settled on Ms. Helen's Grill, a soul food place. I ordered some rib tips and mac and cheese for me and a steak burger and veggies for Ezra. Mom ordered rib tips, mac and cheese and greens. We waited for our food for an hour! We had been told it would be a 15-minute wait 'cause the mac and cheese wasn't quite ready yet. Then we were told it would be another 15 minutes because that batch was for a catering order. Ended up being an hour, though, but turns out, it was worth it. I have never tasted a steak burger like that in my life! Fantastic! Thank goodness Ezra doesn't have a huge appetite. Mine and mom's food was great too! I was not thrilled that we spent so much time sitting inside the market house at Findlay, though. After we polished off our food, we stopped at a few stores and then picked up mom's goetta at Eckerlin's. We got home not long after and just spent some time relaxing then we got ourselves up again and headed to church. It was a great service. We ate some chinese food with mom after and then she headed home. Very short visit with mom but it was nice to see her.

Today we were invited to lunch by our dear friends, Matt and Isabel. Isabel is from Spain and she cooked a traditional Spanish meal for us. Oh my...it was fantastic! Matt is one lucky guy. As usual, we had interesting and thought-provoking conversation.

Ezra and I had a Skype appointment set up at 5pm with the girls -- Stella and Sophia -- from Germany! It was really nice to see their familiar faces. Of course, Sara and Derek were there too. It was nice to do some catching up!

I must brag about Ezra for a bit here. He showed himself to be such a good boy this weekend. On Saturday as we sat at a table for an hour waiting for our food, he kept himself busy by pretending his crayons were rocket ships the entire time. While at Matt and Isabel's today, he played on his own for a couple hours while we chatted. I'm so proud of him. He is such a delight and joy to my heart.

On a more introspective note....I have been thinking about the passage of time lately. I find myself being reminded every now and then of our time in Germany. I will see a picture or hear a sound or smell a scent that jerks me out of the present and catapults me into, what I realize, is the very near past. We have been home for three months now and I feel like we've been here an eternity already. I think about when it was three months until we left Germany and I am bewildered by how much happens in such a short amount of time. It is such an intense feeling that, at moments, it reduces me to weeping. I believe it's so intense because I am forcing myself to stay focused on the present. Just stay focused on the moment so my head doesn't explode from thinking about our odd existence too much. Just try to stay sane. People ask me if I miss Germany. I do at times, but I think I actually miss the difference in my day to day life there as compared to my life here. It was just so laid back. I didn't have to work. We were outside a lot and we didn't have any schedules to work around. Michael studied and wrote from 9 to 5 and Ezra and I just had fun times together. In the evening, we just hung out together as a family. Of course, I knew that life would be different when we got back, necessarily. Our time in Germany was such an intense time of relaxation and just enjoying time together as a family. Don't get me wrong, there are things about our specific German experience that I do not miss. I won't go into that here because I have before. Anyway...I don't feel that I can adequately express my feelings on this. I am just exceedingly aware of this feeling of being shot at hyper speed through my life. I just know I had to turn my head and cry as I heard Ezra giggling uncontrollably in my bed as Michael tickled him this morning. Excuse my cliche vein, but it will seem as if mere hours have passed when I see him driving a car or moving out (as I hope he does someday!), and being tickled into a giggle fit will seem a ridiculous thing to him. Not that Ezra growing up is a sad and painful thought to me. It's the swiftness with which time goes that is sad and painful to me at times. I love to experience everything to it's fullest but sometimes I feel as if I'm living in a montage -- snatching at experiences before they quickly turn into memories forever. Not sure what all this means, necessarily. Do I need to try to slow down? Do I need to do less things? I'm sure there would be value in doing both of those things. But life needs to be lived. Money needs to be made so food can be eaten and homes can be heated. Errands need to be run, dishwashers need to be filled, laundry needs to be folded and put away. I would like to believe that there is value in being intensely aware of the passage of time. It's what makes me get up on a Sunday afternoon from a moment of relaxation to go run around outside in the front yard with Ezra for a bit. It is teaching me to soak my life experiences up as much as possible, I hope. Forgive my rambling thoughts. Everybody has something they are experiencing and living through. I don't pretend that I have some sort of special claim on intense feelings. Just trying to put some words to some emotions and thoughts I've been experiencing.

If you think of it, please pray for Michael and his family. He has a cousin who took her own life quite unexpectedly. She died today.

A New Tenant, Dinner, Classes, Crafts, Pumpkins, Saving Lives, and an Audition

2010-10-05T14:01:00.000-07:00

Friday was a big day in the Hutchins home. We took on a tenant. His name is Fred George and he lives in a glass bowl on our kitchen counter. Of course, the bowl is filled with water and rocks. Yes. We got a fish -- the stereotypical goldfish type. We got him at Meijer on a bit of a whim. Ezra decided on the name Fred. When we got home and surprised Michael with him (ok...it was a HUGE whim,) he added the George, telling us that his maternal great-grandfather was called Fred George. Our fish's full name is Fred George the First the Fish. We figure he won't be the only one we'll ever have....

We had to set Fred George up in his new digs in a bit of a rush because we had a dinner invitation on Friday night! Apparently you're not supposed to put fish in chlorinated tap water (something I maybe would've have known if I hadn't bought him on a whim) so Michael had to run out quickly to buy a couple gallons of filtered water (apparently your own tap water will de-chlorinate itself after 2 days of setting out but Fred George only had 2 hours in the bag he came home in!) We got him in his water and then headed out the door! Our dear friend, Cole, recently moved into a place of her own and invited us over for a meal of homemade chicken noodle soup, homemade bread, and homemade lemon poppyseed bread (and she is a full-time graduate student...wow!) Not only was the food fantastic but the company was great too! We had delightful conversation and Cole even played an original composition on her piano for us at the end of the evening. It was so relaxing and nice to spend time with her.

Saturday morning, I taught my first classes at the Central Parkway YMCA. I teach a Pilates class from 8:15am to 9:15am and then a zumba class from 9:30am to 10:30am. Unfortunately, I had VERY few participants. This particular YMCA is located downtown and is not famous for filling out group ex. classes so I wasn't too surprised. Although, I admit I was a little surprised that I ONLY had the president of Cincinnati YMCA in my zumba class and she had to leave half-way through. I had three participants in the pilates class -- one was the president and another was my boss. The third was a man they had to go grab off the weight room floor. They are really trying to build up the classes there, trying to get people to come downtown. I want to see that happen too so if you have a Y membership and live in Cincinnati, come down on Saturday morning and do some classes with me! I will also start teaching a zumba class at the Williams Branch in Walnut Hills on Thursday evenings from 5:30pm to 6:30pm.

The rest of my Saturday was spent "crafting", for lack of a better term. I received my book on Montessori home-schooling in the mail and had a lot of Montessori learning tools that I wanted to make so, Ezra and I spread out the plastic tablecloth (the one I got for a buck at Meijer) and got to work. He mostly painted and played with stamps, but we were content. I got quite a few projects done, although one big one had to wait until Sunday. It required 24 plastic, resealable bottles. I normally don't purchase bottled water, but sometimes you do what you gotta do. I needed the bottles ASAP, so I emptied them into jugs and pitcher and put them in the fridge and put the empty bottles in the dish drainer upside down. On Saturday, we looked like a very thirsty family.

Despite the fact that Ezra and I were feeling a bit snotty-nosed on Saturday, we made it to the 4:30pm service. We just staked out a corner of the auditorium so we wouldn't contaminate anyone. Ezra did a really great job -- he even let me (and everyone else in the auditorium) know when he needed to go "tinkle on the potty" in the middle of the service.

Sunday is mostly relaxing day in our home although, we did a much-needed home-cleaning in the morning. It was a cold day so Michael went out and found some firewood and we used our fireplace for the first time! I LOVE it! Ezra and Michael also experienced a first on Sunday. Another item Ezra and I acquired at Meijer on Friday was a pumpkin! On Sunday we transformed him into a Jack-o-lantern! Michael has never done this before. It was a fun family first and Jack looks pretty darn good, if I do say so myself...which I do..... Now, I know -- some of you are thinking, "That's way too early. You're going to have to carve another one! Maybe even more than one!" And my response to that would be: "We're ok with that!" It's a fun thing to do and the pumpkin only cost us 2 bucks. We watched It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown afterward (yes, I own it) and had a fun, cozy time.

Yesterday was mine and Ezra's first crack at a real Montessori-type approach to our home school preschool. I think it was a big success! We both had fun and I'm actually looking forward to it tomorrow morning. Our schedule, for now, is Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings from 9am to 10am and then we go to a story time at Joseph-Beth Bookstore afterward. So, not a whole lot, but we're starting out small.

After school, I had a chance to reconnect with an old friend from Crossroads, Jenny B. We ate some pizza and Ezra played at Kid City while we chatted. It was really nice to talk with her. Ezra was really great, considering we talked for about an hour and a half! Actually, at one point he told me, "Mommy! You have two minutes left to talk. I'm not kidding." Poor guy....

After my two minutes were up, we made a trip to Meijer. I learned a lesson there. I need to remember to make Ezra go to the bathroom before we go into the black hole that is a grocery store. Fortunately, I didn't learn this the hard way, but nothing will make you panic and start sweating bullets more than hearing your 3 year old announce that he needs to "tinkle on the potty" in the middle of the grocery store. There is no potty in the middle of the grocery store! There never is! I just asked him if he thought he could hold it (he told me he could!) and told myself that the world wouldn't fall apart if he had an accident. I had other clothes I could change him into if it came to that. However, it didn't come to that! He made it (about 15 to 20 more minutes, actually!) After he potty-ized himself, we picked Michael up from school and headed home. Michael had to turn right around and go back. He needed the car because he teaches a class on Monday evening. Normally it's not a problem for him to take the shuttle home, but, you see, House is on Monday evenings at 8pm and the shuttle just wouldn't get him home in time. We have our priorities, you know.

After work today, I came home to find Fred George gasping for dear life. His bowl looked pretty rough. I went to work right away. Fortunately, we had the presence of mind to fill the two jugs Michael brought home on Friday afternoon after we poured them into Fred George's bowl so I had de-chlorinated water at the ready. Things were not looking good. But, as soon as I got him in his clean bowl, he seemed to get a new lease on life. So, I saved a life today. Just something I do.

Well, this evening I hauled my behind down to Hebron, Kentucky. I found an add for a cover band looking for a lead singer. Hebron is where they practice. It's about a 25 minute drive with good traffic. Not too bad. They were nice guys -- early to mid-thirties. One just got married a couple weeks ago and another has three kids of his own. No big chips on anyone's shoulders. Just some guys who like to play music together. I sang some songs for them. Things seemed to go all right. I really just looked the ad up on a whim....I mean it with this whim.... I figured, "Eh! If I can make some money having fun singing songs, why not?" So if it works out, great! If not, no biggy. I'll keep you posted.

Sick, Triceratops or Cowboy, Corporate Zumba, Stained Pretty, and Things I Miss

2010-09-30T18:19:00.000-07:00

Well, Ezra's sick now. Nasty cold. Picked it up at the Museum Center on Tuesday. According to Michael, he and Ezra were playing in the pretend kitchen area. Apparently there was another toddler there spreading his green snot all over the pretend food. Of course, his mother was chatting it up with her friend in the corner. The kid was sneezing and mouthing everything. Michael said he got Ezra out of there ASAP and they washed their hands but the damage was already done. It's a rough one. He was up a few times that night. I hate when he's sick. Those are probably the moments when I feel the most helpless I have ever felt in my life. Definitely big-time trusting God moments. Michael talked to a pharmacist that night and brought home some appropriate meds for him. That, combined with his humidifier, seemed to help him quite a bit. On the other topic (you may be saying, "What other topic?")....I'm all about exposing our kids to germs and building up their immune systems but c'mon. Take your kid to the grocery store, run your normal errands, but keep your kids mouth and green snot off of community toys...I mean, the kid might as well have blew his nose in Ezra's mouth for Pete's sake. Anyway...that was Tuesday and now it's Thursday and he's doing better. We went to the park today and Ezra rode his bike too. Fun times.

In other Ezra-related news, we are on the hunt for pieces for his Halloween costume. He originally wanted to be a triceratops for Halloween. I found a cute costume from One Step Ahead and ordered it (yes, I'm the mom who will buy a costume if it's cute enough and cheap enough...I look at is as an investment not only in a Halloween costume but dress-up clothes) but it did not fit properly and the quality was really shabby. So, we returned it and somehow the idea to be a cowboy has taken over. Remember that fancy cowboy hat he was given on the farm? I think the idea came from that. So, he has some jeans, I found an appropriate-looking cowboy shirt now I'm just hunting for some other pieces: cowboy boots (of course), a belt buckle, a vest and/or chaps. He has a hobby horse that he can carry around if he wants. It should be pretty good. We'll see....This is the first year Ezra has been anticipating an event. Everyday he asks me if we can go trick or treating. It's a bit odd, because we haven't really talked about it a whole lot. I think it's cute, though. I like to see him excited.

I had a first-time experience on Tuesday afternoon after I got out of work at Gymboree. When we first moved back, I had been contacted by a former member from Bally's (a club I used to teach Zumba and Pilates at.) She works for Proctor and Gamble (along with about 75% of Cincinnati's population it seems) in the Latino Beauty and Grooming department. That department had some sort of conference on Tuesday which was a day full of sessions...on what, I'm not sure, but apparently it was pretty boring stuff since she contacted me to find out if I'd be interested in doing a 30-minute Zumba session in the middle of the day in order to wake everybody up. I happily agreed and found myself in the ballroom of a Marriott leading a bunch of suits and ties in cardio Latin dance. It was hilarious. If you're interested in seeing some pics just check out this album. I was paid well for my services and given a goody bag of beauty products (swag..lol!) Turns out, most of the products were anti-aging products. I'm not saying I don't need them, but I for sure don't need to get myself addicted to something that will make my eyes look 20 years younger only to find I can't afford a refill when I run out. There was one non-anti-aging product in the bag. A "lip stain". It looked bright pink in the tube (a shade I would normally keep away from) but I figured I was at home with no plans to go out so I gave it a whirl. First of all, it basically looked like a magic marker and felt like what I imagine a magic marker would feel like going on your lips. Secondly, they aren't kidding with the name. It stained my lips. I actually put it on my mouth on Tuesday evening and STILL have remnants of it on my lips. I'm really not entirely certain how I am supposed to go about removing it from my lips apart from peeling the skin off. Ezra watched as I liberally applied the stain to my bird-like lips. "Aww...you look so pretty!" he exclaimed. "I like you when you're pretty!"

So, turns out there are a couple things about Germany I didn't realize I would miss so much. The first is pesto. Now, go with me here. I know Germany is not world-famous for it's fine pesto dishes but for some reason I started eating pesto a lot while in Germany. I didn't eat it so much before we moved there. However, when I went to the grocery store on Monday and found myself in the "ethnic" food aisle looking at pesto I realized why I didn't eat it so much before we moved and why I started eating it after. Turns out pesto is stinkin' expensive here and very inexpensive in Germany! Apparently, the proximity of Italy to the land you are living in has a direct effect on the price of the pesto. I bought the cheapest one I could get and odds are we won't be getting it again since it was mediocre at best. So, I miss that I could get cheap yet yummy pesto while living in Germany.

The other thing I miss about our Germany experience is solid German construction. Even though we lived in an apartment-type building, we could hear nothing from our surrounding neighbors (unless, of course, our windows were open) and they could hear nothing from us. This was good since I tend to be an early-riser and exerciser. I am one of those types who, as much as I hate dragging my butt out of bed at 5:30 in the morning, realizes how fantastic it is to knock a few things off my list (ie. exercise, a load of laundry, a quiet, non-rushed shower.) Now, I know that there is plenty of good construction in the U.S. but I am not living in one of those buildings right now and that point was driven home to me when I went to put my laundry in the dryer at 7 this morning and found a note outside my door that read something to this effect:

Your early morning exercising shakes the windows, doors, and walls (little smiley face).

Hmmm....I ran the rest of the way down to the basement only to find another note waiting for me on the washing machine (that had been stopped mid-cycle) which read something to this effect:

Please don't do laundry until after 7am. My bedroom is directly above the laundry room.

Both notes had been left by my downstairs neighbor. So, my morning routine has to be adjusted slightly. Instead of exercising in my bedroom where I thought it might be quieter since it's carpeted, I will now be exercising in our living room. And, instead of starting my daily load of laundry at 5:45 in the morning, I will now be starting it at 7. These are things I can do. It's not a big deal but boy do I ever look forward to the day when I can (and will!) do a load of laundry and Latin dance in tap shoes on my kitchen floor at 2am if I want to! I think I sound ungrateful here, though. I was just thinking today about things I finally have now that most people take for granted that are a big deal to me. It's an interesting list (and these are all things I have for the first time since I've been out of my childhood home): a disposal, a spraying thing on my sink, a laundry machine that I DON'T have to put a coin in, a "dining room", a working fireplace (that would probably be a big deal to most people), more than 3 feet of counter space in my kitchen and more than 1 foot in my bathroom, and more than 6 cabinets in my kitchen. I smile a little every time I use each and every one of these things on a daily basis. This is not meant to give anyone a guilt trip about having cool things (if you have them.) No, this is me recognizing the cool side of being graduate student poor -- I have a genuine appreciation for the things I would have considered "little" or "no big deal" prior to striking out on my own. Don't get me wrong, I still look forward to the possibility of my family having its own personal living space someday, but the desire for it has not consumed me...yet....I am, after all, human and I'm sure it will be only a matter of time before I start to take my little luxuries for granted.

Sick, Flash Mob, Teaching, & Horseback Riding

2010-09-26T12:06:00.000-07:00

...and a month has nearly gone by. Unbelievable. I knew we would be busy when we got back home, but phew! The weeks are just hurtling by. A lot has been going on. I will just touch on a few highlights.

Michael got strep throat the same day classes started at UC! Fun times....this was not long after his birthday (he turned 34 a little over a week ago.) Actually Ezra seemed a bit under the weather at first. We were out for lunch with some friends and they all kept commenting on how well-behaved Ezra was. We accepted the complement, however, deep down, even though Michael and I don't have big time issues with taking Ezra out, we knew he seemed a bit lethargic. We had pizza out with friends that evening to celebrate Michael's birthday and had the same experience except that by that point, Ezra was complaining that the top of his head hurt. The next morning, he woke up with a fever of 102 degrees and his head still hurt. I decided to call the doctor and they told me to go ahead and bring him in. After they looked him over, they declared that there was a small sinusy, respiratory thingy (that was the technical term) going around. That was probably what he had and it wasn't anything to worry about. A couple days later, Michael started getting his own set of symptoms. He was the worst on the day classes started. His fever didn't seem to want to let up, though. I convinced him that it was a good plan to go see a doctor. Good thing. They gave him some antibiotics and, thankfully, Michael was able to secure a sub (our dear friend, Wes) for his first class that evening. I arranged it so that Ezra could come with me to work the next day since Michael looks after him while I'm at work. I did not want him getting strep throat. Michael is better now, though. Thank you, God!

I had an interesting experience recently. I participated in a "flash mob" at Crossroads last weekend. We are talking about the role of play in the life of a Christ-follower. Play is often downplayed. The series started last weekend and we kicked it off with a dancing/playing flash mob. If you're still a bit confused, you can see a video of it here. It was a blast and I met a lot of really cool people doing it. I think there were close to 150 of us who participated. I LOVE being a part of a faith community that thinks creatively. It is such a validating, challenging, encouraging place to be.

I am pleased to announce that I will FINALLY be starting to teach at the local YMCA's again. Once I knew that we would be moving back to Cincinnati, I started emailing all of my former employers. I got the job at Gymboree back right away. I used to teach at a Bally's and that closed but the Y's really dragged their feet for some reason. I started interacting with the Y back in June! I will finally be teaching my first class at the Central Parkway YMCA downtown (about a 5-minute drive from my home) a week from today! I will teach Pilates from 8:15am to 9:15am and Zumba from 9:30am to 10:30am. I will also start teaching Zumba at the Williams YMCA (about a 5-minute drive the other direction from my home) on Thursdays from 5:30pm to 6:30pm. I am really looking forward to teaching consistently again.

Yesterday, Ezra experienced a first. Our dear friends, Shannon and Andrea, graciously invited us to head down to Kentucky with them where they board a few of their horses. We arrived around 11am. Andrea walked a big pasture and retrieved Sweet Pea, a beautiful chestnut Paint. Shannon and Andrea noticed that she looked a bit thick around the middle. We found out later that Sweet Pea is probably pregnant -- an unplanned pregnancy.... I don't know a whole lot about horses, but apparently the pregnancy was not a deterrent for riding. Ezra hopped on all by himself and rode like a champ (with Andrea leading Sweet Pea along.) He has been training a bit on the penny pony at Meijer, so I guess I shouldn't be too surprised. Riding a horse was the main goal of our visit to the farm, but there were many wonderful side benefits. The farm also had a couple pigs, a rooster and some chickens, and lots of hay to climb on. The owners of the farm, Dave and Valerie, arrived shortly after we did (they had been out running some errands.) They were very nice and gave Ezra a sweet cowboy hat. We hit up a truck stop restaurant with everyone on our way back. We had a really perfect day -- great friends, beautiful weather, and fun firsts. The following is a video of our time there:

In other news, Ezra and I have been doing some formal "preschool" time at home. It has been a learning experience for both of us. I am mostly interested in a Montessori approach to education. Of course, with the huge moving transition, educating myself on Montessori preschool education has been on the bottom of my list. I recently ordered an intriguing-looking book: Teaching Montessori in the Home: The Preschool Years. It hasn't arrived yet and until then, I have been investigating on-line Montessori resources for activity ideas. We usually do one hour on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings. We've done some really cool counting games with buttons, some cutting and pasting activities, and some letter activities. We have a sharing time when we each "show and tell" about an item that we've brought with us (the first time, I brought my alarm clock and Ezra brought his Thomas the Tank Engine.) Ezra actually really surprised us yesterday by spelling out the word "bat" with his blocks! So far, we have covered the letters A, E, B, D, P, and T. He knows the sound that each letter makes (including the difference between a long and short sound for the vowels he knows) so I put out those blocks and then asked him to help me spell the word "bat". We worked through it together by me asking him questions (ie. "What sound does the word 'bat' start with?") I have to brag a bit because I've actually been feeling really insecure about the whole thing. When I say that it has been a learning experience for both of us, I don't mean just on a practical level. I have really been challenged spiritually this week. There is so much pressure in our culture to do education this way or that way. All of these expectations and different educational/parenting philosophies. It's enough to make a person go crazy! God has been showing me not to worry about what everyone else thinks in this situation -- mostly to not put so much pressure on myself. I think it's safe to say that I'm definitely a minority in my generation in that most of Ezra's peers are in some sort of preschool program. First of all, I can't really afford to pay for a preschool program. Second of all, I've never really thought preschool was a necessary thing (go ahead...gasp....) I never went to preschool. I feel like our culture is so focused on getting our kids active and going, going, going. Educational success is typically such a high-pressure thing. I'm trying to keep that whole thing at arm's length. Ezra and I (or Michael and Ezra, if I'm at work) engage in all sorts of organic, daily educational activities. This is how I encourage myself when I start to feel like we should have Ezra in some sort of preschool programming. We frequent story times at local bookstores, gymboree classes, the zoo, Crossroads, the library, and the Children's museum. Don't get me wrong, though, we're not busy, busy, busy. Once or twice a week we are at these places. The key here is that we are always talking with Ezra during these experiences. Engaging him in some way. This is how I make myself feel better. I've observed that most parents at these places are with other friends. It seems that the parents are interacting while the children play. At the zoo, families hop from one animal to the next in less than 30 seconds. We typically let Ezra stay and watch as long as he wants to (trying to keep the bane of his generation -- ADD -- at bay) talking with him about what he's seeing. I actually like to go to the zoo and the museum with our friends, but I have to resist the natural inclination to just keep walking and chatting with my friends. Anyway...I'm rambling. At the end of the day, I tell myself that I'm ok with our decision and I think I really am. I'm not concerned that Ezra is not getting enough regular social interaction -- I know he is. He seems to be at the same level as his peers cognitively blah, blah, blah. Our primary goal, above all else, is to teach Ezra to be a loving person. Everything else is secondary to that. He most certainly won't be taught how to be loving if he feels he is being pressured to perform according to a set of expectations given to him by his culture. So, we're going easy on ourselves because this mama is a Type A mama who would love nothing more than to scratch that performance under pressure itch that is CONSTANTLY nagging at her. My hope is to not pass that on to Ezra.

Settled, Work, Fireworks, and the Zoo

2010-09-07T14:30:00.000-07:00

We are all better. Phew! Fortunately, Michael did not have to deal with any puking but he did have his own short version of the bug.

After all the sickness was done, we got back to work on moving in. Several things still needed to be taken to our storage unit and to donation centers. Some boxes needed to be unpacked as well and bedroom furniture needed to be acquired. All of that is done and over with now. We can confidently tell others that are moved in to our home....which means that we've felt confident and relaxed having friends over for meals and long, interesting discussions. Some of you may have seen my Facebook status update but, if not, I'll repeat it here for you:

FYI: The Hutchins Three are ready for you to come and visit us. Consider this your invitation. We would love for you to come. And, yes, this includes you too.... Just let us know when you want to come (we have a place you can stay) and we'll get the calendar out and set it up! We can guarantee good food and good times will be had by all!

So, let us know when you want to come and visit! We love you all but, the last thing on our minds at the moment is packing up our car and traveling somewhere at least for the next month or so. We want to stay put for just a bit after all the traveling around we've been doing. If you're interested in seeing what you would be coming to, here is a tour of our home:

So, apart from communing with great friends, we have been doing other fun things now that we're settled. Work still goes on for me, which I love. I have taken over the classes at Gymboree officially and I'm so happy to be back teaching. I've also been on the hunt for fitness classes to teach. I was contacted by a friend of mine while in Florida about the possibility of singing back-up in a band he's starting. I investigated that opportunity and it wasn't quite a fit for me, but he put me on the track of another opportunity that is looking promising. He teaches spinning classes at Cincinnati Sports Club and put me in touch with the coordinator there. I have met with her and gave her my paperwork. I've been sitting in on some classes there and it's looking like I'll start teaching Zumba classes there in October. It's a really great club and they have a childcare center too which Ezra is permitted to go to while I teach. I'm also meeting with someone at the YMCA downtown about the possibility of teaching some classes there. So, things are promising on that front.

This past weekend was Labor Day weekend. This is a big weekend in Cincinnati. For some reason, this is the weekend Cincinnati has chosen as its annual mondo fireworks display weekend (as opposed to the Fourth of July.) Every Labor Day, approximately 500,000 people venture down to the banks of the Ohio river from Kentucky and Ohio. It's a huge display and we've never gone down because of the problem of parking. People camp out for this event days ahead of time in order to secure a good seat. This year, however, we are within walking distance. So, on Sunday evening, we put Ezra in the wagon and walked about 30 minutes to our spot. We had a great view and Ezra really enjoyed the fireworks display. Cincinnati really is a very pretty city. I've maybe shared this story before, but, at the risk of repeating myself, I'm going to share it again. When I was a little girl, my family lived in Tennessee. My mom's parents lived in Detroit. We would visit them at least once a year and we would take I-75 North from Tennessee to get there. 75 goes right through Cincinnati and since I lived in the country on a dead-end in Tennessee, whenever we came through Cincinnati, my eyes were dazzled by the city-ness of it all. Every time I would declare breathlessly, "Someday, I'm going to live in Cincinnati." Little did I know that someday I would be standing on a bridge over the river watching fireworks with my family calling Cincinnati home. Dreams really can come true.....Here's a video of our time at the fireworks:

So, that's what we did in the evening on Sunday. During the day, we made a trip to the zoo. We recently acquired a zoo pass and even though we knew the zoo would most likely be packed, we decided to go anyway. That's the beauty of a pass. You don't have to cram it all in on one day. If we get overwhelmed or prematurely tired because we ate a funnel cake during the hottest part of the day, we can just leave and come back another day. It also helps that we live only about a 10-minute drive away. The weather was great and we had a really fun time. We caught the cheetah-run exhibit. The Cincinnati Zoo is one of only two zoos in the country that has a cheetah run. They have two cheetahs who love to run and it was unbelievable to watch them doing it. Of course, we rode the train and the carousel as well. The zoo pass really is such a great deal. We don't pay to park and we don't pay to ride the train or the carousel. We also get to bring one guest with us for free every time we visit....so.....something else you can do with us when you come to visit. Here are a couple videos from our time at the zoo:

Today I taught some play classes at Gymboree and Michael and Ezra went back to the zoo. After Ezra did some quiet time, he and I walked to the post office. It was about a ten-minute walk but it was hot out today. Oh well. It was nice to get out and walk around. There was a guy sitting in front of his home just a couple doors down from us who we passed on the way there and on the way back. "Back already?" he asked.

"Yup...back from the post office," I replied.

"The post office?!" he asked in shock. "You walked in this heat all the way there and back -- up that hill -- already?"

"Yup."

If you're interested in seeing some pics, check some out here and here.

Moving, Vacation, & Puking

2010-08-23T08:28:00.000-07:00

Yes...it's been a long time....a lot has happened in that time. I am completely exhausted and still don't feel like I'm settled yet. To be honest, it's just a touch discouraging. To make matters worse, the only reason I have actually decided to create a new post is that I am currently being forced to stay in bed because I have caught some sort of riotous stomach bug. What better time to blog than in between vomit sprees? More on that later.

We are now in Cincinnati and have been here almost a month. Our move down went as smoothly as possible. Michael and I started the day out in Michigan by ourselves moving everything into the truck from the three separate locations where our possessions were residing. When we made it to the second location (my papa's home) my brother showed up and was an IMMENSE help to us. He helped out at our third location too (my parents' home) and we were done loading up the truck by 6pm. Not too bad considering we got started around 11am. We had some dinner and tried to get to bed at a decent time.

Michael left earlier than us in the U-Haul on Saturday, July 31st. Ezra and I got on the road around 7am. Michael made it to our new home around 11:30am and got the keys from our new landlords. I picked up some pizzas and drinks and arrived around 1pm. Driving around Cincinnati, I felt as though I never left. Our many friends (about seven total...including a couple that drove an hour and a half from Louisville, Kentucky!) showed up to help us unload it all around 2pm. It was great and surreal to see everyone, even if the clock already feels like it's running. All total it took about 3 hours to unload and then it was just a matter of taking our storage stuff (ie. christams decorations, maternity clothes, etc.) to our storage unit which is conveniently located where we also dropped off the truck just a few blocks away. Around 6pm, we all headed over to Skyline Chili for dinner, a fitting first dinner back in Cincinnati. We said goodbye to our friends afterward and made it home for our first family pic in front of our new place.

Our new apartment is very pretty. The day we moved in was the first time I saw it in person. I really enjoy it. The only major drawback is that there is VERY little closet space. Each bedroom (2) has a clothes closet and that's it. There is a small closet in our hall area but that is home to the air conditioning unit. Our vacuum just squeezes in there. That's ok, though. We are managing, so far. Odds are we'll only be in this place for a year anyway.

In our first week, we made a trip to IKEA to get some much-needed shelves for books and other items. We also purchased a new sofa. I LOVE our new sofa. It's a type I've always wanted. Dark brown leather, clean lines. Here is a picture of it, if you're interested. (When our place is looking the way I would like it to look, I plan on posting pics of our apartment where you will see the couch in it's context.) I also had my first day back at work at Gymboree Play & Music. I sat in on the music classes I will be taking over. It felt as if I'd never left.

We've been back to our church a couple times which has just been wonderful. I really missed Crossroads and all our friends there. I volunteered one night to help with some cleaning in the Kid's Club area. Ezra and I have also visited a story time at Joseph-Beth Bookstore. It was nice to do some Cincinnati things.

We have most of our belongings unpacked, but we are still in process. I'm waiting on some storage solutions that are coming to me and we're in the process of getting new bedroom furniture. Ours was damaged while in storage. It was white wicker and some nasty stuff got into it. Unfortunately, we had to get rid of it leaving us with nowhere to put some of our clothes which, apart from the ones hanging in the closets, still remain in boxes. I was really sad to part ways with that furniture. While at times I admittedly grew tired of the limited white wicker garden-y bedroom palette I had to work with, it was very special, sentimental furniture to me. My parents gave it all to me for my 16th birthday in the hopes that I would be able to use it for a long time in my own home someday. I used it for a good amount of time, but I had planned on having it a lot longer. I cried. I am planning a trip tomorrow evening to IKEA to scout some (hopefully) inexpensive stuff out.

But, I'm getting ahead of myself. In the middle of all this, we went on a vacation to Destin, Florida with my side of the family. With a few rare exceptions, my family has been going to this beach destination every year since I was a little girl. It's a beautiful place and we always have a very nice condo that faces directly onto the ocean. Unfortunately, it's on the Gulf of Mexico, so, a few months ago, there were some concerns over the oil spill and whether or not we were going to be able to go. We scouted out some different options just in case, but in the end, decided to go for it based on very positive reports (including a live webcam) that our condominium was posting on Facebook. We left on Friday the 13th and met up with my family in Montgomery, Alabama where we spent the night at a hotel. Before we met them there, though, we stopped at a rest area just inside the border of Alabama to have a picnic lunch. This wasn't just any ordinary rest area, though. It had a space ship! So, needless to say, Ezra was quite thrilled that we ate our lunch next to a rocket ship! Here's a short video of him with the rocket:

The next day, we loaded back up and traveled the remaining 3 and a half hours to Destin. The weather was dicey our first day there -- rainy and very windy -- but the rest of our time there was perfect. We had a blast swimming and playing on the very clean beach. Ezra had so much fun. He learned how to jump into the pool by himself while he was there. Me and all my family had been trying to coax him into it to no avail and wouldn't you know, three little girls swam by and asked Ezra if he wanted to play with them. That was all it took. He was jumping in with them on the count of 1-2-3! as if he had been doing it his entire little life. Didn't think girls would start having an influence on him at such a young age, but I guess it's already begun.....Here are some videos of us playing at the beach and the pool:

There was one major downer to the week. People got sick. Before we left, my brother's daughter, Emma, got some sort of puking bug. She got over it quickly enough, but then her mother, Mickey, got it. They were both all better, though, by the time we left for Destin. On Monday, however, my brother got sick. He did not vomit nearly as much as they had, but was just laid up for a day. Two days later, on Wednesday, my papa got it. He was laid up for a day too. Then it was done....or so we thought. On Friday night, as my siblings were getting ready to leave with their families, my sister said, "Hmm...I don't feel very well. I hope I'm not getting what they had." The next morning, Michael, Ezra and I were the last ones to leave the condo (a shorter drive home...my parents and papa had left at 3am on Saturday.) I called my mom to let her know we were on the road and I found out that not only was my sister sick, but she and my father were too. A road trip is NOT the best situation to be sick. And I would soon learn from first-hand experience. Around noon, Ezra started up his puke machine full-throttle! It was wretched. Fortunately, he timed it with our exit for lunch at a picnic pavilion. Unfortunately, the picnic pavilion was a lot further off the beaten path than we had expected. We finally made it to the State Park where I stripped Ezra out of his clothes and let him walk around in his underwear, poor guy. I had extra clothes, I just didn't want to try to keep him from puking all over them while I tried to inhale some lunch. A really neat thing happened, though, during our turmoil. A fox came within about 3 feet away from us. It was mine and Ezra's first time seeing one. Unfortunately, we were too mired in puke and tears to make a dash for the camera. We entertained the thought of stopping for a night at a hotel, but with the speed at which this bug was traveling, we were very aware that it might not be long before Michael and I started ralphing. We made the decision to press on. We stopped at a Walgreen's and I picked up some supplies: Sprite, pedialyte, 2 disposable tupperware containers, hand sanitizer, baby wipes, paper towels, disinfecting wipes, a new water bottle for Ezra, and some pull-ups just in case things started to rev up at Ezra's other end. He was not pleased to put on a pull-up.

"I'm wearing a diaper," he whimpered. "I'm not a baby..."

"I know, sweetheart," I replied, sympathetically, "but even big kids and grown-ups wear diapers when they are very sick."

"I don't wanna be sick and have the pukies," he managed through his tears (poor guy!)

"I'm so sorry, honey. I know you don't want to be sick. I don't want you to be sick either, but, unfortunately, it's part of being a human."

Ezra pondered this for a moment, then wailed, "I don't wanna be a human!"

The remaining 10 hours of our road trip were nothing short of a barf-o-rama. He threw up at least 20 times on the rest of the trip. I would hold 1 container in front of his face and he would do his deal and then I would empty it into the holding container. I would then clean him up with some wipes and then clean out the puking bucket with paper towels and a disinfecting wipe and the whole thing would start again in 5 minutes! Miraculously, we only stopped a total of four times during the entire trip and the first one was before the whole thing started! We made it home around 9:30pm. Ezra sat and watched a couple episodes of Winnie-the-Pooh while Michael and I carted all our stuff upstairs. At that point, we were still feeling fine. I set up our air mattress in Ezra's room and then I gave him a bath. Of course, he puked one final time, on me, AFTER his bath. I was COMPLETELY exhausted by the time he was in bed. Michael kept an ear on the monitor to Ezra's room while I hopped in the shower. I crawled in bed on the air mattress afterward and Ezra didn't wake up until morning, behaving as if nothing had ever happened.

Michael and I, on the other hand, were scared and just waiting for our turns to come around. I decided to do as much unpacking from our trip and from our move as possible before the worst happened. I made it the whole day yesterday without incident. We spent some time with our dear friend Wes and went to Graeter's, our favourite ice cream joint and had Indian food from Krishna for dinner. After I put Ezra in bed, I felt very tired, but there were still things that needed to be done. I finally went to bed around midnight.

At 6am, I woke up from a dream that went something like this:

It was documentary-style. I was watching the documentary which was about the life of Elvis and the last thing I heard the narrator say was: "Elvis finished one last beer with his friends and told them that they needed to turn in for the night -- no more drinks. He said they should invest the money in something else. But he didn't. He went out and smashed up 22 stream-line motor homes instead."

After I had a little bleary-eyed chuckle at the absurdity of my dream (although, Elvis was not too big a surprise...we are covering Elvis in my music classes this week...), I began to notice that certain something whirling around in my tummy. "Here we go," I thought. "My turn has arrived." I tried to talk myself out of it, telling myself that I was just being a pessimist but, 20 minutes later everything was confirmed when I made a mad-dash for the bathroom.

Michael was still asleep, so I grabbed my pillow on the way to the bathroom and tossed it on the couch (even while sick, I'm still multi-tasking...) While I was in the bathroom, Michael woke up and told me he would go to the couch. So, here I am in bed. Things seem to be dying down a bit now for me, but Michael just came in and told me he felt that certain whirling around in his tummy now too.....So, we will see....

If you're at all interested in seeing pics from our move and vacation just check them out here.

Phew! Family & Friend Fun Times

2010-07-28T12:37:00.000-07:00

Phew! It's been a full but very fun week!

Last Monday, Ezra and I started the day out with a bike ride that went much longer than I had expected. I had planned on being out for around 40 minutes. I had a storytime to do at the library at 10:30 and I wanted to be home no later than 9:30. Unfortunately, I didn't remember the layout of my parents' town as well as I thought I did so we ended up being out for about an hour. I was doing some pretty fast pedaling but mostly out of desperation! I didn't want to be late for the storytime. We got back at around 10 to 10. That was cutting it pretty close, but we made it on time.

Storytime went pretty well. I had quite a few children. When I finished, a four-year old in the front row exclaimed, "You were wonderful!!!!!" I was a little saddened by the shock in her voice....as if she had planned on being disappointed.

Not long after we got home, Ezra, my father, and I piled into the car and began the 3-hour trip to Chicago where we would pick up Michael from the airport. We made it there in time and it was so wonderful to see Michael again. I know it had only been two weeks since I last saw him but two weeks is long enough to really miss the man you love. Of course, Michael was quite tired that evening.

On Tuesday, Ezra and I went with my sister-in-law, Mickey, and her daughter, Emma Jane, to the farmer's market. It was a cute little place out in the middle of nowhere on the edge of Corey Lake. Every year there is a festival in Three Rivers called the Water Festival. Of course, there is a parade associated with the festival and this little market had built the most wonderful float of a miniature farmer's market. Unfortunately, the parade was rained out so they had this spectacular float that was never used. They decided to use it to let children play on so Ezra and Emma had a fun time playing on that. Afterward, we stopped over at a nearby park where Ezra and Emma played for about a half hour. Here are a couple videos from our time out with them:

That evening, Michael and I went on a date! We rode the bikes to downtown Three Rivers (just a couple blocks from my parents' home) and ate at Paisano's. We were the only ones on the outdoor patio and the weather was beautiful. After dinner, we walked down to the Riviera Theatre where they were showing the film Metropolis. Some new footage of the film was found recently in South America and art house theatres are showing the film with the new footage included. It was REALLY great. I had never actually seen the film. Michael had (apart from the new footage) and that, combined with the jet lag, is what made it difficult for him to stay awake. It was a really nice time.

On Wednesday, Michael, Ezra and I rode to the library together in the afternoon. I did an improv comedy workshop for a teen group that meets there on Wednesdays. Ezra played with the train set and Michael did some writing. Afterward, Michael rode home and Ezra and I went on a bike ride. I decided to take a different route and wow. Holy hills! Let's just say I got a good workout in!

That evening I was able to reconnect with an old friend. Esther was my very best friend in high school. She was the maid of honour in my wedding. We were able to connect about a few years after our wedding. She was a travel nurse for a while so it wasn't always easy to stay connected. We saw each other a couple times after the wedding but on Wednesday evening it was the first time we had seen each other in seven years! Esther is a nurse in Kalamazoo now and has purchased a home. She and her sister are currently residing there. We had a wonderful time catching up. It was almost as if no time had passed. We have promised to stay in touch this time. I'm looking forward to many more conversations with her.

I spent Thursday going through a lot of our belongings in my parents' home and getting it all put into boxes. While looking for an empty box in my parents' basement, I came across some old movies. One of the movies was a recording of a play I had been in during my junior year of high school. The play was called Stage Door and it was my first really dramatic role, but oh, was it ever painful to watch. My mid-western accent was so bad but it was pretty darn funny to watch.

That evening, I met my sister for sushi at Sakura in Portage. It had been nearly a year since I had sushi last and it was delightful. I always have a fun time with my little sister and this night was no different. Afterward, we went to her home. She and her husband started renting the place last fall and I never got over to see it while I was in the States during the holidays. It's a really nice place and I'm very happy for them.

Michael got up very early on Friday morning to take my parents' to the airport. My father won a cruise to Alaska and they had to leave the house by 4:15 in the morning to get to the airport on time. So, Michael, Ezra and I were on our own most of the day. We left in the afternoon, though, to go to Michael's parents' home in Wauseon, Ohio. Unfortunately, when we arrived, his mother, Nancy, was not feeling very well so we did not see much of her that evening. However, Michael's father, David, took us to eat at a Chinese restaurant and we had a delightful time.

Saturday was spent trying to chill out but the heat was doing its best to keep up from doing that! We finally set up the sprinkler for Ezra to run around in. I realized as he ran through the shower that it was his first time having that experience. He had a blast! I was able to catch this video of him:

Sunday afternoon was spent at the Ruffer Farmhouse. We had such a great time. Ezra had 6 of his cousins there to play with. We swam in the pond, the kids played in the yard. We grilled hot dogs and hamburgers and had root beer floats afterward. Ezra and I also spent a good deal of time relaxing in a hammock. It was just about as close to a perfect summer afternoon as we could get. It won't quite be the same experience for you but you can watch this video of some of the highlights:

Monday morning I woke up pretty early and headed back to Michigan. When we made the plan to come and visit Michael's family, I had forgotten that I had a storytime scheduled at the library in Three Rivers right in the middle of our stay. I originally had wanted to ride a bike back (it's about 100 miles) but that would have required me to leave on Sunday and and I would not have gotten back until Tuesday. I'm pretty sure I could have done it, but I just preferred actually spending that time with Michael's family. So, I decided to drive back. It's only about an hour and a half away. As I pulled on to the Toll Road, my check engine light came on. I pulled over and checked my gas cap. There is a new law that requires that when someone does not tighten the gas cap sufficiently on a new car, the check engine light has to come on. I learned this the hard way a few years ago when the light came on. I took it into the shop and paid 75 bucks for them to tighten my gas cap. I was so peeved. So, I tightened the gas cap hoping that would turn the light off. Well, the light didn't turn off, so I got ahold of my brother who gave me the number of a guy -- Tom -- my family takes their cars to in Three Rivers. He is a family friend of ours and he said he could check it out for me after my storytime. He also told me that the light just doesn't go off by itself. I hadn't planned on staying that long in Three Rivers, but it ended up being a good thing. Not only did Tom tell me that it was indeed the gas cap that was causing the light to go on but I was able to eat lunch with my brother, Michael, his wife, Mickey, and my niece, Emma Jane. Nice times. I also ended my stay in Three Rivers by stopping in at Goldies to get my favourite ice cream flavor ever -- Peppermint Patty (chocolate ice cream with peppermint patties mixed in...think Girl Scout Thin Mint cookies....fantastic!)

That evening, Michael, Ezra, and I ate dinner at his sister Amy's home. We had a great time. We played a fun card game with her and her husband, Jared, while Ezra played with his cousins, Jacob (Cub Cub) and Elizabeth (Zi Zi). Nice times...again.

Yesterday we got together with the man who was the best man in our wedding, an old friend from college days, Doug, and his family. We hadn't seen him in a few years. He and his wife, Karen, have a 6-year old daughter, Katie. Their second is on the way and is expected to arrive at the beginning of December. We had great time with them. We visited a water park, had some ice cream, ate lunch and dinner with them, baked cookies, had a bonfire, and read a story together to end the night. It's always difficult to say goodbye but I'm really thankful that we got to spend some time with them. Incidentally, Doug and Karen run a very successful photography company -- Mattson Pictures. They do weddings and portraits, among other things. Check them out if you're looking for a good photographer in the East Michigan area. Here are a few videos from our time with them:

This morning, Michael, Ezra, and I had a family bike outing. We left the house at 10:30am and didn't get home 'til about 1:30pm! We stopped to check out a bike we saw for sale in someone's yard, Ezra played at a local park for about 30 minutes, we rode somewhere to pick up a burger for lunch and then we stopped for ice cream at Tiny's and some items from the grocery store on our way home. It was a lot of fun even though we were all super sweaty when we got home. I gave Ezra a bath when we got back and then he did some much-needed quiet time.

This evening, we all convened once again at the Ruffer Farmhouse to celebrate Michael's father's 64th birthday. There were 17 of us, total and we had a great time, as usual. Veggies from the Ruffers' garden, fruit from the Ruffers' trees in the the pies...just fantastic.

Tomorrow is mine and Michael's 10-year wedding anniversary. Just a touch surreal. I am having a difficult time believing that it has already been 10 years. Crazy. How will we celebrate? Well, we'll start off the day packing up our stuff here at Michael's parents', loading it into our car and driving back to my parents' town. Maybe we'll eat some food with my siblings but we'll probably get to bed early because Friday is the beginning of Project Move. We will pick up our rental truck and load up all our possessions into that truck. Hopefully we will get to bed at a decent hour on Friday night so that we can get up early in the morning on Saturday and haul it all down to Cincinnati. I am not excited about the load up and load out process but, as I've said multiple times before, I am ecstatic about being settled again for a bit. So, I just gotta bite the bullet and get this move done. Pray for us.

If you're interested in checking photos out of our experiences, just click here.

Cycling, A Photo Shoot, Eating, Brothers and Sisters, & Participating in Reality

2010-07-18T11:07:00.000-07:00

Life just keeps going. We have been doing the natural things since being back with my family -- hanging out, eating together, playing games, shopping (although, that last one isn't necessarily "natural"...at least not for everyone...)

I've been riding a bike a lot lately. I say "a" bike because it's not mine; it's my mother's. I purchased one of those trailer things for Ezra to ride in behind and we have just been going everywhere with it. We love it. I fully plan on getting my own bike very soon, it's just a matter of locating the right one for the right price. My parents live in a fairly small town -- Three Rivers, Michigan -- so any errands I need to run can easily be accomplished on the bike. We've gone to the bank, the post office, the grocery store, my grandfather's house and just general long rides. The terrain here is fairly flat so that makes things a lot easier. I do use the bike ride as a work out, though. I don't stop pedaling the entire time. Ezra chills in the back -- reading books, eating a banana, playing with a toy. Even on the hottest day, we are cooled off by the breeze as we ride.

Friday, I took Ezra to get his three-year portraits taken at JCPenney. We've been going to Penney's since Ezra was 3 months old. They always have a great deal and I get a ton of photos in whatever poses I want. I really had no idea what to expect from Ezra this time. I figured it could go one of two ways. He would either cry and be shy or be completely charming and hilarious. It was a toss up. I am VERY pleased to report that he chose the latter. He was cracking me up -- rolling all over the place, giggling, and jumping. The photographer was cracking up and she was able to get him to maintain certain poses for enough time to get photos taken. I really wish I had brought the video camera. As she was snapping away, I knew the decisions on poses were going to be difficult ones. We waited while she loaded them up in the computer and I'm glad to say that it didn't take me too long. I had promised that if he cooperated he could have a cookie when we were done -- he got three. I was so proud of him. If you're interested in seeing the results of the photo shoot, just click here.

Last night, my family all went out to eat at Das Dutchman Essenhaus to celebrate my mother's 50th birthday. We LOVE this restaurant. It is right in the heart of Amish country in Middlebury, Indiana and the food is so good. We go about once a year -- twice, if we're lucky. It takes about 30 minutes for us to drive out there. On the drive last night, Ezra fell asleep about a mile from the parking lot. Poppio carried him in and he snoozed in my lap for the first part of the meal. The meal was delicious, as usual, and then you get a piece of pie. I had to get mine to go because I was so full.

This morning, at my parents' church, my brother and the team he went with reported on their time in Haiti. I'm so glad he was able to have that experience. They went down and were able to operate a clinic and just serve in the community in general there. They went with a group called Advenures in Missions. They showed a short video of their trip. Each person spoke about his or her individual experience and there were two common threads that surfaced. The first was how much they thought they were going to do for the Haitian people only to realize how much they had to learn from and were ministered to by the Haitians. The other was how close these Christ-followers felt to the Haitian Christ-followers. Even though they couldn't speak with each other without a translator, when they were together worshiping, they were the same. There was something deeper connecting them. I remember those same feelings when I was in South Africa. It really made me miss my South African brothers and sisters. I attend a church in Cincinnati, Ohio called Crossroads and, fortunately, we maintain a relationship with a church in a small township called Mamelodi. Every year since 2006, folks from Crossroads make a trip to Mamelodi for about 10 days and folks from Mamelodi make a trip to Cincinnati for about the same amount of time. I would love to go back again. No clue what God has planned for me, though.

Tomorrow, we go to pick Michael up from the airport. I am very excited to see him. I have missed him a lot. He was in a town called Wuppertal the past couple days to present a paper at a conference. He was able to see an old friend from the Collegienhaus there and said that his time there was nice. He traveled back to Marbach yesterday and his flight leaves from Stuttgart tomorrow. I know he is having a difficult time saying goodbye to our German existence. I'm still having a difficult time participating in reality again but it will be much easier with my Michael at my side.

Family Reunion, Driving, and Disappearing Time

2010-07-13T11:56:00.000-07:00

This past Saturday, my father took Ezra and I to see our family on the Hutchins side. My brother-in-law and sister-in-law, Corey and Honour, graciously stored our automobile for us while we were out of the country. I needed to retrieve it so we decided to make a day out of it. They only live about an hour and a half away from my family so it's not a bad drive at all. We arrived around 11:30 to find that another of Michael's sisters, Amy, was already there with her two little ones, Jacob and Lissie. Everyone was in preparation mode. Two cakes had been made to celebrate our return and Ezra's birthday. Totally unexpected. Preparations for a cookout were also underway so I chipped in by grating the cabbage for the coleslaw. Ezra played with his cousins who were already there -- Weston, Sammy, Norah, Willa (Corey and Honour's) and Jacob (Cub Cub) and Lissie (Zi Zi) (Jared & Amy's.)

Around noon, another of Michael's sisters, Isabel, showed up with her family -- husband, Matt, and children, Audrey, Jack, and Micah. Shortly after, Michael's mother and father (Nancy and Dave) showed up with Grandpoppie and Aunt Hillary! We had a really great time! Ezra LOVED playing with his cousins. The Ruffer cousins (Weston, Sammy, Norah, and Willa) enjoyed showing their cousins around their farm house and the barns. They have several Rhode Island Reds and Ezra got to feed them and he tried to hold one too. Pretty sure I saw him kiss one also. They also have a pond so we were able to take a swim in the afternoon. After our swim, we all headed inside for some cake and ice cream. The cakes were made from scratch by Amy and the icing and decoration was made and done by Honour. They were so good. Everyone gave presents to Ezra after we ate. We had such a delightful time with everyone. It was so good to see so many smiling, familiar faces. Here are some videos from our time there:

Ezra and I loaded ourselves up into the car around 4:30pm. The sun was shining brightly as we pulled onto the toll road. About halfway through our trip, however, the heavens let loose. Holy Smokes! I turned on the wipers and found that the drivers side wiper was messed up somehow so it was not doing its job very well. I had to pull over under an overpass to fix the wiper (thank God it was fixable...) It was raining sideways by this point so despite the fact that I was under the overpass, I was drenched. I fixed the wiper as someone pulled over behind me. I thought maybe they were pulling over to see if I needed assistance but they stayed in their car. I got back into mine and pulled off. Apparently, they had pulled over because it was hailing at this point. Others were pulling over, but I could see bright blue sky in the distance. I persevered and it payed off. In less than five minutes it was bright and sunshiny again. Nothing like a bit of a challenge for your first time back on the road.

Another cookout was underway when we pulled up in my parents' driveway. We had a nice dinner of steak and corn on the cob and salad with them and Haley and Hogey as well. The real treat was after dinner, though. DRams had purchased the stuff to make S'mores. They have a fire pit in their back yard, so we all gathered round and Poppio started roasting marshmallows. The first one he caught on fire, much to Ezra's delight. We gave the burned one to Uncle Hogey (who likes them that way) and then he put another marshmallow on. This one turned out better and, after giving it to DRams, who put it in between some graham crackers with some chocolate, Ezra tried his first S'more (or as he called them "Snores"). He LOVED it and had chocolate all over his face. However, the real delight of the whole experience for Ezra was setting marshmallows on fire so, being the indulgent grandfather that he is, Poppio set to work "accidentally" lighting marshmallows on fire. Ezra would try his best to blow them out from where he stood. Funny stuff.

On Sunday morning we went to church with my family and then afterward my mom made some wings, macaroni salad, and some greens. It was all very delicious. It was a pretty warm day, so we got Ezra's kiddie pool out and filled it with water. Since he was playing on the deck, I set myself up at the table out there in order to keep an eye on him while going through all the mail that had come to my parents' home for us in the past six months. That was a tiring task indeed.....

I was able to get the Evite sent out for the party we're wanting to throw for my mother's 50th birthday. Unfortunately, I failed to realize that the party was supposed to be a surprise. Let's just say that, because of me, it's not anymore. Oops....

After I sent out the Evite, my mother and I headed outside to try to figure out how to attach the new bike trailer I purchased for Ezra to ride in onto the bike. In the end, it was easier than we thought it would be and I was glad to have it attached because I wanted to use it the next day.

Yesterday, I had a storytime scheduled at the local public library. Ezra and I took the bike. It took us about 10 minutes to ride there. Not bad at all. I had three other kids show up besides Ezra. They don't pay me per child, so it really makes no difference to me how many show up. We sang some songs and read some stories. When we were done, I got a call from my brother who got in from Haiti around 3 in the morning yesterday. His wife, Mickey, had been in Utah with their daughter, Emma Jane (19 months), visiting her parents while Michael was in Haiti, and her plane came in yesterday afternoon. He wanted to know if I wanted to go with him to the airport. I hadn't seen him yet, so I was glad for the chance to spend some time with him. Ezra and I raced the bike home, got our things together, hopped in the car, and headed to Michael's home. We met him there around half past noon, hopped in his car and were on our way.

We got to the airport right as Mickey was getting off the plane. Michael got out and I circled around for a bit. "Are you excited to play with Emma Jane?" I asked Ezra. "Well, Emma Jane is a baby. She plays with baby toys," he informed me. We only had to circle twice and then we saw them. It was so great to see Mickey and Emma. I can't believe how big Emma is. She is just so beautiful.

We got back to my parents' around 5pm and when we walked in the door my mom asked if we wanted to go to the Chinese restaurant with her and my father. We happily agreed and hopped in the car with them. Dinner was great and when we got home, I decided to try to knock off one of the items on my long list of things to do for this month. We need to secure a moving truck since we are moving all of our stuff back down to Cincinnati at the end of the month. I had been referred to PODS. My brother used a company called ABF when he and his family moved from Florida to Michigan last summer. ABF dropped off the truck, Michael and Mickey loaded it all up, then ABF drove it to Michigan for them. The whole thing cost about $1,100. I tried to go through ABF first, but they told me that we weren't moving a far enough distance for them so they are the ones who referred me to PODS. I called them up yesterday evening. I spoke with a very friendly representative but, in the end, it was most assuredly not within our budget. They wanted $1,600 originally. When I told him that was much more than I had been thinking it would be, he told me to hang on. He came back a minute or two later with a new figure -- $1,400. Yeah...still out of our price range. So, looks like we're gonna go with good ol' U-Haul. We've always used them and no, it's not fun driving them, but we're willing to do what we have to do.

This morning, I knocked a few more things off my list (including securing the U-Haul rental) and then after breakfast, my dad and I did one of his P90X workouts. He's been doing this program for some time now. This is the first time I've ever done one of the workouts with him. This was also my first workout in over a month. Of course, it was plyometrics -- lots of lunges, squats, and jumps. Probably not the smartest thing to start with right out of the gate, but I took it easy. I didn't push too hard. After about an hour of that, I got the bike out, and Ezra and I rode to the grocery store. The trip only took about 15 minutes one way and it was a nice cool down after that workout.

This evening, Michael, Mickey, and Emma Jane came over for dinner. Ezra and Emma played together in the pool and after we ate dinner, I took both Ezra and Emma for a ride in the trailer on the bike. Ezra and I have decided to call the trailer "Dusty".

Later, after I got Ezra in bed, I hopped in my car and headed to my brother's home to chill out with just the siblings. We played a game of spoons which is always a fun game. It was nice to just relax with them.

Tomorrow will mark a full week since we've been back already. That's just crazy. I miss Michael and think about him often. I can't wait to see him soon. He will be here before I know it, though.

If you're interested in seeing some of the photos I have taken here, just click here.

Gallows Walk—Aurora Rising—Dinner with Friends

2010-07-10T22:25:00.000-07:00

I was more productive in the archive yesterday, so I made up for the surprising efficiency by cutting my workday in half. I didn’t want to jinx anything by seeming too greedy. So, though I arrived at 8:30am as usual, I left shortly after lunch time and made my way back to the Collegienhaus for a respite and to plan my next move. Frau W. at the archive circulation desk appreciates punctuality and diligence, and is more likely to be helpful in a kindly, grandmotherly way if one strikes the appropriate rigorous pose, but I had other plans. I wanted to go exploring.

I remembered having seen something interesting and enigmatic on a map of Marbach that we had acquired upon our arrival back in September and had since discarded. It was labeled simply “der Galgen” (the Gallows) and looked like it might be a short walk up the hill behind the train station. I suppressed the urge to quickly research and plan my excursion. I just wanted to wander, to lose myself in the landscape and be surprised by something new. I also secretly hoped that I would be compelled to do something illicit along the way. If I couldn’t find an official overlook or park, I hoped to be forced to sneak a sweeping view of the countryside from the edge of someone’s wheat field or after creeping quietly into the middle of a vineyard. Stolen water is sweet, after all.

But I thought far enough ahead to bring some legitimately acquired water just in case. Mandi left a water bottle behind—probably for just such an eventuality—and I filled it up from the tap. Then I packed the bottle, a bag of cookies, the two cameras (and for some reason my laptop?) into the backpack and set off around 5pm.

I began slowly. This was to be a ramble, after all. I took the usual route through town, stopping in at a bakery for what turned out to be an irresistible Käselaugenbrötchen. If you have ever enjoyed an asiago cheese bagel from Panera, you may already have some sympathy for my having spent a Euro on a piece of bread baked over with cheese. However, what makes these Swabian specialties even more sumptuous is that the rolls are crafted not from bagel dough but Laugen—the makings of a pretzel—which is baked, salted, dusted with tangy cheese and then baked again. The cheese is crunchy around the edges and chewy in the center. The bread is fragrant and soft and salty. I will make one for you sometime. I promise.

After consuming my Brötchen, which took over my sensory faculties for a while, I entered the stern phase of the hike. I was headed up a steep grade, and found myself going roughly parallel to where I thought I should end up. But every time I turned up another street, it perversely curved away from what I thought must be my goal. And though the shadows of the houses were already stretching themselves out like yawning cats in the late afternoon sun, it would be hours before the heat abated. (I’m sorry, Mandi. I forgot to put on that hat you bought for me.)

Finally, after having wandered into a sleepy, up-scale neighborhood—the cars suddenly changed from Opels to Mercedes and Porsches—I came to a decision. I was being forced after all. And so I started off across a wheat field. There is something decidedly delicious in the swish of wheat when it is taken by the breeze. Like other grasses, wheat is somewhat top-heavy when ripe, and so the wind has a lot to play with when it decides to rake its ethereal fingers through the long blades and slightly drooping heads of grain. I stopped to snap a few photos, and check once more that the coast was clear. Then I spotted a gravel path about twenty yards ahead and thought better of my trespassing.

It turned out that this path led onto another, only slightly broader path that headed directly up the hill. What I didn’t know then was that I had stumbled upon In der Au, the ancient sunken road (now properly drained and paved) that connected Marbach with Steinheim and the Bottwar valley beyond. Since my aimless hike had now been channeled, so to speak, I followed the road until it forked, and after a brief detour down the other path, which heads back though cornfields and vineyards in the direction of Benningen, I arrived at The Gallows. It turns out that this spot, just short of halfway between Marbach and Steinheim, is now a nature preserve and recreation spot complete with playground equipment—sorry Ezra, only big-boy toys—and grill pits. At the absolute crest of the hill stand two enormous sycamore trees. They have to be well over 200 years old and most probably functioned at one point or another as convenient, last-minute gibbets, since they stand far enough away from both villages to display their warning to would-be criminals while keeping the smell outside of town. Of course, Steinheim still has its 16^th century gallows, or what remains of them. The semi-official lynching trees must then have been employed by Marbach. Or perhaps some enterprising cartographer simply saw the trees, concluded that they would have made good execution grounds, and named the spot a gallows.

I really have no idea, but it is the kind of place-name conjuncture that activates your imagination.

The view from this park is amazing, and you can see pictures here. It was so chest-sinking and expansive—you get a panoramic view of the Bottwar valley—that I decided this would make an excellent location for another of my plans: seeing the sunrise.

Now, I can suspect what you are thinking. Caught up in the moment, and impressed by the latent Romanticism of this park, Michael is going to get himself mugged. The thought actually occurred to me, too, as I made my way back down the hill and waited at the bus stop. When I finally got home, I did some preliminary checking. (The Germans have a slang expression for this: “Google dich schlau,” or in English, roughly “grow a brain. Google it”); Google proved cautionary. An article in the Marbacher Zeitung came up praising Marbach for its sinking crime rate, but observing that the Galgen remained a hot spot for teenage malefaction.

Oh well. You only live once.

And so before dawn this morning, I rose, showered, brewed coffee and set off naked—no, no, I remember now, I put on clothes too—and set off fully clothed in the crisp graying to search out a sunrise.

I arrived on the gallowed ground about an hour before sunrise. For the technocrats among you, that means at 4:37am. The horizon, however, had already begun to glow faintly as though through ash. Then slowly, slowly, the glowing band grew brighter. The grays around me warmed. The trees, now quite vigorously applauding the breeze, donned greens and oranges and purples as Aurora herself burst out from behind the distant hills and shot the world through with colors.

A cow began lowing in a barn on the slope to Steinheim. He and I know why people used to worship the sun.

---

On the way home, I stopped in at Keim in order to take a photo of the bakery, since I don't believe we have ever done that. The 19^th-century-looking cashier I mentioned before is the one on the left in this picture.

After returning from morning walk, I went to the archive and was again very diligent. Frau W. was likely rather proud of me, particularly when she discovered that I had already been awake for 5 hours.

Then, having been wakeful, diligent and productive all day, I headed home for the evening. I had asked our good friend N. to help me finish off the huge package of pasta sitting in my cupboard. So we gathered, along with two other Collegienhaus regulars--one of whom happened to be the person who translated Sebald's work into Spanish--and shared a lovely dinner on the terrace. I did the cooking: fettuccine with olive oil, basil, garlic, salt and pepper, a dash of balsamic, tomatos, and mozarella (I didn't have any other cheese left). N. brought the bread. The Spaniard and the Mexican brought good conversation. We sat in the slowly cooling air and talked and talked and talked about everything and nothing. The Spaniard wanted of course to hear about my dissertation topic and we talked a while about Mr. Sebald and his work. Then the conversation shifted to other topics. The Mexican and I talked about perceptions of our countries at home and abroad. Something I had never considered before was the incredible strain that immigration to the United States places on Mexican society. Not only are Mexicans leaving homes they've lived in for generations and breaking up families--sometimes for years--to travel to the US, but the southern districts of Mexico are now flooded with would-be immigrants from the south who have run out of money and have had to stop over in Chiapas for a while. He told of meeting a large family (mom, dad and 6 or 8 kids) who had traveled overland from Bogota, Columbia to Mexico City before running out of money. It was gruesome to hear how they were living.

Mexico City is something like 1,900 miles from Bogota. That's a long way to walk.

Commence Transition Phase

2010-07-09T10:45:00.000-07:00

And, just like that....we're back in the States.

Fortunately, the day before we left was, surprisingly, not AT ALL hectic. I was quite pleased. This is NOT normal for me. I am typically packing things up 'til the wee hours the night before, but I was determined that would not be the case this time. I spent most of the morning packing up our suitcases. I had time to sit down with Michael and M., a friend from the archive, for one last meal of doener kebab (how I'll miss it...) and we ate and talked for over an hour! After they left, I was done with everything not long after. I kept going through a mental checklist, trying to figure out what I had forgotten to do, but when the rooms are empty because all of your stuff is in suitcases, there's really not much more you can do. Because I was done so quickly, I got to relax in the evening, which was my plan all along. Michael and I headed up to the terrace and shared a bottle of wine and a bowl of popcorn as we watched our last sunset together in Marbach am Neckar. It was absolutely gorgeous. We talked about our favourite (and least-favourite) memories and our life situation. We had a couple teary-eyed moments and concluded that we are extremely blessed. I had taken the laptop up with me because I was downloading some audio stories onto the iPod (more on that in a moment) for the plane ride for Ezra, so we decided to play some of our favorite relaxing, lovey music. Our time on the terrace ended after we had a spontaneous time of dancing (including some silly Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire imitations....really bad imitations...)

We headed in around 10:30pm. I had wanted to try to get to bed at a decent time. So far, so good. I read myself to sleep as usual, quite pleased that I was going to be taking on the next day's journey with a good night's sleep under my belt. Alas! for that was not to be. I woke up at 4am and had to go to the bathroom and then I couldn't get back to sleep. My mind started racing about the day ahead. If I thought I wouldn't have awakened Michael, I would have opened my book again to distract myself, but the light would surely have woke him. So, around 5:30, I conceded defeat and got up.

We had a nice breakfast together -- some traditional bread and meat and cheese -- during which Jana Lempp stopped by on her way to school to say goodbye. She will be heading to the States herself next month. Maybe you remember me saying that she and her brother and father are all dual citizens of Germany and the States. She will be taking advantage of that citizenship by spending a year with her family just outside of Seattle so that she can attend an American high school. We're hoping to orchestrate some type of visit for her to Cincinnati around Easter if she can find a good deal on a plane ticket.

After we finished up our breakfast, we headed down to the Lempp's with the rest of our baggage. It all fit into the car beautifully and Michael posted on our ride there and our check-in.

It was, indeed, very difficult to say goodbye to Michael. I know I've said it before, but something about saying goodbye in an airport or at a train station just intensifies every emotion you are feeling. We made it through security fine enough (except I forgot to take off my belt, so I got the special treatment with the little squealing wand thingy.) There was nearly an hour and a half left before our flight was scheduled to depart so we just read some books and chilled out. We also each ate a pretzel which Michael had procured for us from the bakery that morning. When we finally got on the plane, we found it was not very full at all. The flight from Stuttgart to Frankfurt was only about 30 minutes. Reminded me of the flight I used to make from Detroit to Kalamazoo back in the days when I travelled a lot for work. Unfortunately, I always forget that the Frankfurt airport is a lot like the Cincinnati airport in that you have to take a bus from the plane to the terminal (of course, not all flights have to do this, but I always manage to get the ones that do.) Everyone was piled onto the bus waiting for me and Ezra. We were waiting for someone to bring us the stroller that we so conveniently gate-checked. We finally got it and got on the bus that took us to the terminal which, thankfully, happened to be the same terminal our flight was leaving from. We had about 20 minutes till they started boarding, and it was a good thing because even though it was the same terminal, it was the exact opposite end of the terminal. By the time we arrived at our gate, everyone was forming that poor excuse for a line, otherwise known as a shoving mass, to get on the plane. Once the gate workers saw that I was there with a child they told everyone to step aside and let Ezra and I get on. Thankfully, he and I had the two seats on the window. The aisle was on the other side of me. After making a quick trip to the bathroom, we settled into our seats and got ready for the long flight ahead of us.

Of course, I was exhausted. I had hoped that I would be able to sleep on the plane, but I should know better than that by now. I cannot sleep on planes, even if I'm by myself. The air just gets so dry and you start to get (excuse my expression here but..) airplane boogers. You just feel as though your nose is full of them! I kept drinking water whenever I had the chance, but it just doesn't seem to ever make a difference. I got maybe 20 minutes of sleep when Ezra was sleeping. Other than that, I can't complain. Ezra always travels very well and he gave me no problems. He slept between 2 and 2 and a half hours and watched movies and cartoons and played with toys the rest of the time. I managed to watch Alice in Wonderland (still up in the air on that one) and Invictus (which I REALLY enjoyed.)

Oddly enough, the complications didn't start until after we had landed and gotten through passport control. In complete contrast to our last time flying into the States (at the end of the passport control line with all the other children who had been on the plane), someone retrieved Ezra and I almost immediately and escorted us to a special line, if I can really call it a line since we were the only ones in it. We grabbed a baggage cart and headed to the carousel to wait for our bags. As we were landing earlier, Ezra started complaining that he had "Gas in his tummy." So, as a precaution, he and I ducked in the airplane bathroom before we left the plane. Nothing happened. He seemed to be over it. But it all came back, literally, as we were waiting for our bags. "Mommy! My tummy hurts! I have something in my mouth..." he moaned and then, puke, puke, puke. Right before we landed, the airline attendants passed out a warm snack to us. On this flight, it was a calzone stuffed with meat and cheese...basically a hot pocket. Ezra ate half of his and then I made the mistake of giving him a Pez dispenser I had gotten for him specifically for the flight. I actually didn't think he would like the candy. I got it because it was a Woody the Cowboy dispenser. I was fairly confident he would ignore the candy for the most part. Yeah....after I had been gathering our things since we were preparing for landing, I happened to look back at him (about 5 minutes after I had handed the dispenser FULL of Pez) and there were NO Pez inside of Woody anymore. "Um...Ezra, did you eat all those candies?" I asked, a bit concerned. "No," was his quick reply. "Well, where are they?" was my next logical question. He and I looked for a bit and there were NO Pez on the ground or under his butt. He had eaten all of them. So, a freshly filled belly of greasy hot pocket and an entire package of Pez do not make for a good combination when a toddler is landing in an airplane. Of course, Ezra's clothes were covered in puke and he was screaming. So, we found a corner, I sat on the ground at the feet of my screaming puky boy and began stripping his stinky clothes off of him. "I don't want to be naked at the airport," Ezra managed through his screams. I had an extra pair of pants with me, but I didn't have an extra shirt (an understandable foresight of the potty-training-focused Mommy...) I did have a light sweatshirt jacket for him which he wore. Of course, I had no plans for him to wear that outside since it was a steamy 100 degrees in Detroit upon our arrival. "Glad this happened now," I chirped to Ezra. "Our bags are on their way and you have plenty of extra shirts in there!" So, we waited...and waited....and waited...and the carousel stopped. Somehow, we had missed the announcement that there had been a baggage breakdown in Frankfurt. Nearly 100 passengers were without their luggage. Apparently, our bags decided they just needed one more night in Germany. So, Ezra and I made it through customs a lot more quickly than if I had been pushing the stroller AND the cart with all four of our suitcases.

After customs, it was just a few steps 'til Poppio came into sight. I love seeing my dad's face when he sees Ezra after a particularly long time of being apart. Ezra ran right to him. I managed to get a hug in and then we had to head over to the baggage office to make our claim. Fortunately, we were second in a line that nearly stretched all the way out to the parking lot. The good thing about a routine delay of baggage is that you don't have to cart it all the way to your car AND you get it delivered right to your doorstep. If it wasn't for the inconvenience of having to wear the same underwear for nearly two days non-stop, I would be fine if my baggage was delayed every time! It took a bit of time to get the claim filed but once that was done, Ezra, Poppio and I headed out to the car.

We decided to stop at Meijer to pick up a pair of pj's and a tee shirt for Ezra on the way back. I also made a stop at Taco Bell...oh, how I missed it. Funny little story: when we left the airport, Ezra asked if he could have his little car. I had purchased a toy Smart Car for him in the airport and he LOVED it. I knew he had it in his hand as we walked out to the garage but I couldn't see it anywhere. As Dad pushed on the breaks when we got to the bottom of our exit to Meijer, the smart car rolled down the windshield and onto the wipers. We all laughed and laughed. We had, after all, already driven about 15 miles! Apparently, my dad had placed it on the roof of the car when he was getting stuff inside. I hopped out and got the little car before we took off again. We stopped at my brother's home on the way into town top pick up one of his cars so I would have something to use the next couple days. My sister and her husband were there waiting for us and my sister and I shared a tearful hug! It was really great to see her after such a long time. My dad headed home with a sleeping Ezra in the back seat and Haley and I followed.

Ezra was very excited to see DRams when he and Poppio got back to the house. When Haley and I pulled up, he was on the new bike that she and Poppio got him for his birthday. They couldn't wait to give it to him. We took it easy the rest of the night and around 10:30pm, I finally got Ezra in the bath tub and then in bed.

My sister stayed the night but I'm afraid I was not very good company. I was so tired I felt nauseated! I passed out around midnight but, as I expected, Ezra awoke pretty early -- around 5am. I crawled in bed with him. I pretended like I was getting some sleep and that I could actually get Ezra to go back to sleep but Ezra would have none of it. It was morning and I reluctanty agreed with him by getting out of bed around 6:30. We made some eggs for breakfast and got ready for the day.

Papa the Great stopped by for a visit. It was nice to sit and chat with him. Afterward, I had to run a few errands. I found out, after calling Lufthansa, that our bags probably wouldn't be coming for another day. So, I needed some small essentials. As you can imagine. While out, Ezra, Haley, and I stopped for lunch, which was nice.

When we got back, Ezra and Hogey played with his train set (Hogey and Haley bought him a Thomas the Tank Engine at the store.....he's only seen the show once and I'm praying it stays that way....) and we just relaxed. Ezra did go down for a nap shortly after.

Haley and Hogey made dinner for us which was DELICIOUS! Grilled chicken, corn on the cob, and asparagus...yummy....Ezra was in the bath not long after dinner and then in bed. Haley, Hogey, and I started a game of Bananagrams but we abandoned the game mid-way through because we wanted to just talk.

This morning, Ezra got his hair cut by Doug at his barbershop (Ezra calls him Doug, the barber.) This is the same place that Papa the Great, Poppio, and Chunky Uncky (my brother) get their hair cut. It is the classic American barber shop. Doug and his wife, Kathy, own a very small store front together. One side is the barber shop and the other side is the salon where Kathy does hair. Isn't that the coolest thing? They have a boxer name Zoe who is at the shop with them whenever they are there. She has her cage in the corner. Ezra's been there a few times before, but it had been a while (I've been the only one cutting his hair lately) so, even though we sat there and watched him cut the hair of two men before him, he was a little uncertain at first. "Mommy! Wait just a second! In a minute we'll do it!" he pleaded. Doug had the good idea to turn him around so he could see what was happening in the mirror. That calmed him quite a bit and from then on, he was great.

Doug congratulated Ezra and gave him a lollipop on the way out. Ezra and I then headed to the library. I'm doing a few storytimes there while I'm in town and I wanted to check in with the youth services librarian to see if there was anything that had changed since last summer. All is the same and Ezra enjoyed the opportunity to play on the train table. After the library, we ran by the post office to send some items off in the mail.

Ezra made it without a nap today and this evening me, Ezra, Papa the Great, Poppio, and DRams went out to eat at good ol' Applebee's...eatin' good in the neighborhood. Poppio had been in Sandusky, Ohio since yesterday morning so Ezra was quite pleased when he walked into the restaurant. Afterward, Ezra and Poppio headed to the park and Mom and I headed back home to enjoy her backyard.

The jet lag seems to be loosening its grip on us and we're taking it pretty easy these first few days. Monday I plan to hit the ground running. This is going to be a very busy month for us. I'm glad to be back "home" but until we are back in Cincinnati and settled, I will feel as though I am in transition. I know there is some question as to the political correctness in the use of the term "gypsy", but Ezra does have the book Madeline and the Gypsies by Ludwig Bemelmans and one line in particular has been striking a chord within me every time I read it to him these days: "The big wheel was folded and the tent/ They packed their bags and away they went/ For Gypsies do not like to stay/ They only come to go away."

Earlier I had mentioned that I was downloading some audio stories for Ezra. I have discovered a really great website called Storynory.com. I decided to do a Google search for "free children's audio stories" after Ezra listened to the audio version of Up In The Tree by Margaret Atwood about a million times in a row. Storynory is what I found and it is awesome. They have so many great children's stories -- classic, foreign, fables, fairytales, myths, bible stories, chapter books, originals -- and all of them are FREE to download. I was able to get quite a few downloaded and have quite a decent Children's Audio Story's playlist going on our iPod now. I feel that simply listening to stories is such a great experience for children. It causes them to be better listeners and it forces them to use their minds creatively -- if you don't have a picture in front of you showing you what the Grinch looks like, you're going to come up with one in your head. I'm really excited about this site and hope you get a chance to check it out!

Departure, A Hat and its Wearer, Losses and a Quiet Night

2010-07-07T10:44:00.000-07:00

When I finally woke up, at 5:30 this morning, Mandi had--inexplicably--already gotten up, dressed, and left the bedroom without my having noticed a thing. Sneaky, sneaky. She had told me the night before that she would be sleeping until 6am, which was why I had set my alarm for 5:30. For some reason, I like to be the first one awake. I don't really know why.

At any rate, when I found her huddled over the computer, tooling around on Facebook, she informed me that she had already been awake for a while...a long while, in fact. She woke up at 4am and could not get back to sleep. Of course, I understood. I anticipate having the same problem when I am scheduled to fly home.

After getting ready, I headed out to the bakery to fetch some breakfast rolls and pretzels. I trotted through our now ungainly park, aghast at the beauty of the place. Despite the mess they have made of what was once a lovely green space, (what with the senseless hewing of some 30 healthy trees, the digging up of perfectly good sidewalks, the mindless troweling under of tulips, and the ensuing general disarray,) it still fairly glowed in the clear summer sunlight that trickled happily through gently soughing leaves. That was when I started choking up (for the first of many times today.) Everything around here is so closely associated with Mandi and Ezra. Every time we have gone somewhere, done something fun, or seen interesting things, it is we who have gone, done and seen. Our experiences here--most of them, anyway--have been shared between the three of us. And now, Lufthansa was going to make of us a disjointed I, stretched hazardously across the Atlantic.

---

When I arrived at the bakery, it was already 6:30 and the tall, rather nineteenth-century-looking cashier was just opening the door for business. I struggled through telling her that I was retrieving Ezra's last pretzels (for a while, at any rate).

"Und wo ist der kleine?" (and where is the little one) she smiled.

"Hoffentlich schläft er noch" (hopefully, he's still asleep) I grinned thinly back. "Heut' ist der große Tag für ihn und die Mama. Die fliegen nach hause" (today is the big day for him and mommy. They are flying home.)

She seemed authentically, gratifyingly dismayed, and she tossed a "Marienkäfer" candy into the bag for Ezra to eat on the plane. Mandi will have to tell you whether he ate it or not, but I presume he enthusiastically did.

---

Shortly before 8am, we reported to the Lempp household to load the remaining baggage into the car and then we were off for the 45 minute drive to the airport, which went off without a hitch. Gudi skillfully navigated around blocked traffic and even took an backdoor-route to the airport. She dropped us off at Terminal 1 well within our safety window (we had budgeted 2 hours) and left us to our gradual leave-taking. That process also went smoothly, except for the inconvenience of having to pay a fee for checking too many pieces of luggage. When Mandi and Ezra flew over in the fall, they were each allowed 2 checked bags. This time, they were permitted 1 a piece, and the supernumeraries ended up costing about 80 Euro, which was, at any rate, much cheaper than sending them through the post, but nevertheless ärgerlich (annoying).

And then, suddenly, Mandi and Ezra were preparing to go through the security checkpoint. We maintained a brave facade for Ezra through the whole affair--"Who are you going to see when you get off the plane? That's right, Drams and Poppio!"--and shared a kiss that is to last us till the 19th.

I waited until they were out of sight and then found my way to the S-Bahn station for the long ride home, which was uneventful enough. Don't you all know that Mandi and Ezra are leaving? How can you all look so bored?

---

When I arrived in Marbach, I waited for the bus instead of walking up the long hill. The glorious sunshine had been picturesque in the early hours before it had actually done its work of transforming this little town into a sweaty cauldron. As I stood and glistened there on the platform, it occurred to me that the last time I rode this bus was with Mandi...of course. But before I could succumb to my sentimentality, I noticed a curious hat perched on the top of a white-haired, spare woman talking with a group of puzzled looking elderly travelers, and it distracted me from the melancholia. This was no ordinary hat, mind you. It looked like the woman had raided her granddaughter's stash of antique doll clothing and placed the nearest, undersized adornment on her head. She had fastened it with a hat pin, no less, as was the fashion in the grand age of millinery. But the rest of her ensemble--a light colored blouse, slacks and sensible tan walking shoes--jangled terribly of the late 20th century. She glanced over at me and smiled, then she asked something in incomprehensible, rather starkly non-native German to the effect of "are you from here?" When I looked puzzled, she broke into English. "Oh, you are an American, no?"

"Why yes, I am, actually--"

"Oh well, then, you don't maybe know how we get to the Schillerhöhe, or?" She explained that she was visiting from Portugal and wanted to go with her friends--her hat bent in their direction--to the museums. I indicated that I was waiting for the bus headed that way, and that if she waited for another 10 minutes, I would gladly show her where to get out. For that matter, their S-Bahn tickets would be good for another three stops on the bus line, as well. She paused. Her friends broke in with suggestions, but she held up a hand.

"You don't think you should better walk?"

I was taken aback. Had I understood her correctly? Did I really seem so much in need of exercise? Or was this her polite way of asking for walking directions? The doll-hat danced in front of my eyes as she gesticulated with her party of would-be museum goers. They were speaking in German again, but I somehow could not penetrate the incongruity of her appearance to make sense of her statements.

"But, it is far, no?" she continued. "I see. We shall go with the bus...with you."

We fell silent. It was now hot and awkward; two of my favorite operation conditions had been rolled into one delightful mess.

I was gearing up the vocabulary-grammar machine to suggest that if they would really rather walk, I could describe a route for them, when another elderly gentleman recognized them from across the platform and waved them over to the sidewalk, where they, after gesturing in my direction for a while, set off up the long slope of Günterstraße.

I, however, took the bus.

---

I cleaned up a bit when I arrived in our now much smaller home. I still had some garbage to trundle downstairs and two carpets to deliver to the Lempps. And I wanted to take stock of my situation here. I have a huge amount of rice in the cupboard, but man shall not live by rice alone, so I made a shopping list. Then I, around lunchtime, went over to the archive to put in my time, but my heart wasn't in it. I think I wrote two worthwhile sentences. Toward late afternoon, I spotted the doll-hat stepping into a cab. So it is that far, after all, no? Then I wandered down to Handelshof to look for groceries. I took the new path that Gudi had shown us on our way to the Indian restaurant the other day. Much more shade, as she said then.

When I returned, I set about...what did I do, actually? Oh, yes. I checked my email and the Lufthansa flight status page about a hundred times. Then I reheated my hotdogs from yesterday, cooked some rice and waited for the soccer game. The interested parties gathered with me in the television room downstairs. Nerves were running high, and staccato exclamations burst out from time to time. Jetzt! Jetzt! Schieß endlich! Dieser Oezil muss 'raus! (Now! Now! Shoot already! This Oezil has to go!) But it was all for naught. After Germany lost convincingly, we all went off to bed.

---

I wish you could have seen the difference, Mandi. No vuvuzelas tonight. It is as quiet again as when we first arrived.

I miss you.

Two Sleeps

2010-07-05T07:24:00.000-07:00

Ezra and I leave Germany on Wednesday. I'm no longer surprised by the swiftness of time. We are not feeling too crunched for time as we manage all the last-minute preparations. However, this will be MY last post from Germany. Michael has said that he will try to post something since he will be here nearly two weeks longer and has plans to visit some interesting places. I sincerely hope he does.

We had a birthday party for Ezra this past Friday who turned three on the same day. It ended up being quite the shindig, but, boy, was I ever busy on Friday! I baked two cakes (we wanted a two-layer cake) and decorated them, pounded out 20 hamburger patties, cut up a huge watermelon, wrapped some small gifts, and just prepared for the party in general (ie. setting up chairs and tables, carting all the food and drinks down to the wiese, setting up music.) We had nearly 20 people show up and, despite the July heat, we had a great time! Ezra received several very thoughtful gifts -- some books, some small toys, a game, and a Lego front-end loader. I say the gifts were thoughtful because everyone purchased something with our packing in mind -- it all should fit in our suitcases. Ezra spent nearly the entire time at a table playing with the front-end loader. He finally left his table when I brought the cake out. He acted bashful when everyone sang happy birthday to him and blew his best but couldn't quite get the candles out. So, I helped him just a bit. Karin and Frank and their children all came to the party and when they left, it was the last goodbye. Ezra and I walked them to their car and I had my first teary-eyed moment from our departure week. I think it was the combination of the goodbye and the beauty of the place. The sun was setting and the sky was so many beautiful colors. We were surrounded by the huge sycamores in the park, a statue, two beautiful museums and peace. I will miss the beauty of this place and my heart swelled and sunk at the same time as I watched, through the tears spilling from my eyes, as Karin and her family drove off. Ezra was with me and he cried as well, but I think his sorrow was tinged with fatigue also. It was 10pm. So, when we got back to the wiese, we started cleaning up and then made it inside for a quick bath and bedtime. After I read to Ezra one of his new stories (Up In The Tree by Margaret Atwood...if you have a child, you should go get this story), we began to talk about our favourite parts of the day. He went on and on about his birthday party. His favourite part, he said, was when everyone sang Happy Birthday to him. Glad he enjoyed it. Still a bit difficult for me to believe that he is three already. Here's some video from the party:

Saturday morning, we shared a pancake breakfast with some friends here at the Collegienhaus -- pancakes made from scratch by my wonderful husband who happens to be a marvelous cook. We had a nice time. We all knew the weather was going to be very hot that day, so we just took our time. Ended up inviting C. up to our place to just chat and sit still with us. She stayed for lunch and then we all ended up going back down to the community area to watch the Germany/Argentina World Cup match. When asked by a fellow viewer who I thought was going to win, I faithfully shouted out, "Germany!" even though Argentina was most assuredly the favourite for this match. Imagine everyone's astonishment when Germany beat the pants off Argentina, 4-0! Needless to say, there was great cause for celebration. Those of us at the Collegienhaus clapped our hands and hooted a few times, then went back to our respective rooms. Michael, Ezra and I went back to our rooms to get ready to head out for dinner in Ludwigsburg with the Lempp family. As we walked to the train station with Gudi, the city of Marbach turned into one huge party. Church bells were ringing, people were driving in their cars, which were decked out in German flags, blowing on their vuvuzelas and shouting and whistling, people were crowding the streets. It was fantastic. And the Germans haven't even won the World Cup yet! Here is a video of some of the celebration:

When we arrived in Ludwigsburg, the celebrating was still going on. We made it to our restaurant, though (an Indian restaurant...yummy) and found that it was tucked in a secret, quiet pocket of the city in a lovely garden. The food and company was delightful! I came across this fantastic sentence while browsing through the menu: "On the culinary level, it was the east which conquered the west and the universal popularity of curry is the delicious proof." The Lempps generously treated us to this meal and it was a big celebration. Karl, Simon, and Ezra all celebrated birthdays this past weekend. I tried a new drink at the restaurant. It's called Spezi and it's a mix of Coca Cola and Fanta. So great! After dinner, Michael and Ezra took the train home and the rest of us piled into the Lempp's car. While sitting at the light of a busy intersection, we all noticed a German flag on the ground in the middle of the intersection. Of course, it fell off of someone's car, but Ezra had been having such a delightful time with Simon's flag at the restaurant that Karl decided to stop in the middle of the intersection and pick it up for Ezra. Keep in mind, there were no other cars behind us, so we didn't annoy anyone. Ezra was thrilled when he received the flag.

It was another late night for Ezra. He didn't get in bed 'til about 10:30. We let him sleep as long as he wanted on Sunday and he slept 'til 10! Turning three will really take it out of a guy. Because he slept so long, he and I stayed home from church. I did some laundry (my final load at the Collegienhaus) and crocheted. I have been working on a big project this past month or so. I have been working on a prayer blanket for the director of the choir, the one whose husband passed away recently. I finished most of it yesterday and would have finished it all if I hadn't taken a break to make a really cool trip. Karl took us to the top of the cupola of the Schiller National Museum! Of course, I didn't mind taking the break at all! It was so cool, even if I experienced a bit of vertigo (I can't look up when I'm on such a high spot...makes me feel like I'm going to puke...) Marbach is a really beautiful town and we got some great photos from up there. Here is a video from our time up there:

That evening, to celebrate Independence Day, Michael and I watched, you guessed it, Independence Day with Will Smith &, my personal favourite, Jeff Goldblum. I think it will be a new tradition. It's amazing how dated that film looks now! There was a Fruitopia machine in one of the shots, for pete's sake! I had completely forgotten about Fruitopia yet I drank so much of it when I was younger!

This morning, I finished up the blanket and then we had lunch with some Collegienhaus friends. You may remember D., N., & their son, A. They were here back in February and are the ones who took us to Heidelberg. They are back and here for 2 months. Since Ezra and I are leaving so soon, though, we wanted to squeeze in some time with them before our departure. So, lunch was the obvious choice. I had my last doener kebab with them...at least, my last one for a while. It was really yummy.

This evening was my last choir rehearsal. Not an easy experience. We sang songs that were my requests. Afterward, I said something to the choir that Karl translated for me. I basically told them all that for some reason, God has me living my life one year at a time now. I never know what the next year will bring. When you are in that mode, it is very tempting to not reach out and make friends because I will just have to say goodbye to them soon anyway. There's no point. But, we sang a song in choir tonight that reminded me about how blessed I am and why it's good that I make friends. The song is called Trusting in You. It has a part that says "I have no gold, I have no treasure..." This, of course, is true for me. The song goes on to say, "but there's a wealth that I possess that is better than the best/It's giving me strength and full security." God has me in so many different experiences so that I can get closer to Him through lots of his children. I am a richer person for having known all these people. And, as always, I said "See you later" not "Goodbye." After that, I was presented with some lovely gifts -- a beautiful linen scarf, a photo of our entire choir (which Thommy is also in) and some homemade biscotti and a flower. So very nice. Then we had some ice cream (they called the sundae "Hot Love" -- vanilla ice cream, whipped cream, and warm raspberries....yummy....) It was during this time that I gave Susi the blanket. She couldn't read the letter I wrote to her. I didn't think she would be able to. But we had a nice moment together. I feel like she really knows how I feel now about Thommy's death and her experience. Michael had translated my letter into German. Not long after that, I headed back home..at least, my home for the next two sleeps....

I mentioned earlier that this will be my last post from Germany. Because of that, I thought it would be fitting for me to do a couple reflective lists:

Things I've Learned While Living in Germany:
how to reheat anything on a stove or in an oven
that I can walk a lot more than I thought
that I can re-use a lot more things than I thought
that I can wash all our clothes by hand
that I can hang-dry all of our clothes
that I can survive with slow internet
that I can use pork whenever I would have used beef
that learning German is difficult...for me
that I can exist outside of my comfort zone
that I can direct a choir and lead a group of 100 women in song even though we don't share the same language
that I really appreciate the German way of eating -- big meal of the day at lunch, small, easy, light meal at dinner

Things I'm Looking Forward to Getting Back to:
free water in restaurants
skim milk
consistent grocery store products
required nutritional value labels on those products
a dishwasher
screens on my windows (the fruit flies are no fun to deal with )
cheap mexican food (get ready taco bell)
feeling as though I'm completely understood by everyone
having high-speed internet
seeing my close friends and dear family
Crossroads
having access to a car
a free washer and dryer
a membership to a library where most of the books are in English
seeing a new movie in a movie theatre and watching some of our favourite television programs
American football
knowing which stores to go to for certain items

Things I'll Miss:
the locks on the bathrooms; they all have a color indicator on the outside of the door; when the door is locked, the color is red, when unlocked, green....simply brilliant
doener kebab
our friends
the tranquility of this place
the slower pace of our existence
the proximity to our dear friends, Klaus and Martina
pretzels
maultaschen
being in a culture where everyone is thoughtful about what they do with their trash (ie. recycling and composting) regardless of their political or religious affiliation; it's just a matter of course here
the amount of time I've had to spend with Michael & Ezra
the beauty of this place
trains
radiated heat
the sheer abundance of great parks for children
the choir

If you'd like to see pics of any of the above, just click here and here and here.

One Week

2010-06-30T06:31:00.000-07:00

Phew! Time flies when you're having fun....or really busy.

Ever since we've been here, I've known that it would be absolutely ridiculous if I didn't see the Black Forest. It is only a 2-hour drive from us and Germany is famous for it. Well, last Friday we had a wonderful opportunity to make the trip. Triberg is a town in the Black Forest that boasts Germany's tallest waterfall. It's also world-famous for it's cuckoo clocks. Gudi, Karl's (the Hausmeister) wife, has been and Karl wanted to go see it, so he offered to take us along with him! We left around lunchtime and as soon as we arrived, headed straight for the waterfall. It was really beautiful. We nearly made it to the top, but we were sidetracked by a trail that promised to take us to a chapel. We ran out of steam before we made it to the chapel, though, so we turned around and headed back. It's difficult to describe the beauty of a place apart from showing pictures (which is why I use photos so often) but I will make a small attempt. The richness of the black-green of all the evergreen trees against the light-green of the grass was a VERY pleasing sight. Crashing down, the waterfall pooled at several spots and the clear-coolness of the water was so tempting on that hot day. What a delight to be under the shade of such large, old trees -- to look up and see the bright blue of the sky through a needled silhouette. We eventually made our way back down to the tourist shops. I did really want a cuckoo clock. We stopped in at a store and, after a while of deliberating, we found the perfect one. I had thought we would go with a traditional cuckoo, but, there was something different in store for us. At one point, Ezra had wandered off, and I turned to see him staring at a display of cuckoo clocks. I went to retrieve him and the one he was looking at was the one for us. It is a more modern design -- something different the local clock-makers are working on and we LOVE it. Here is a picture of it. The store was a large, trustworthy one. Our clock came with a guarantee of sorts, but what really sealed the deal for us was when we found out that the service center for their clocks is actually located just outside of Cleveland, OH! Crazy! Here is a video from our time in Triberg:

We hopped back in the car and decided to try to make it over to Titisee, another town in the Black Forest with a beautiful lake. Unfortunately, we missed our turn and went nearly an hour out of our way, but the ride was so pleasant, that we didn't mind turning back. When we finally made it, we sat on the lake for a bit, but it was getting close to dinner so we decided to enjoy the view of the lake from a restaurant where we enjoyed a genuine piece of Black Forest cake after our meal! Wow. It was incredible! Here is a video from our time in Titisee:

After dinner, we made our way back to the car and were on the road by 8pm. On our way back, we exchanged all different sorts of stories -- stories of past school experiences, car accidents, travel opportunities. Ezra sat and listened very intently to all of them. Then when there was finally a lull in the conversation, he began to tell his own story, which was just a mish-mash of all the stories we had told. It was simply delightful. I swear he nearly has a photographic memory. He would employ the same inflection and hand movements we had used when he would get to the particularly exciting or funny parts, he would pause for the little chuckles you have when you're telling your own funny stories. We have entered a new phase. He is doing this all the time now and I just LOVE it.

Saturday was a packed day as well. In the morning, I FINALLY did some loads of laundry in the new, high-tech, and 50 cents more expensive washing machine that the Collegienhaus recently acquired. After that, we made it over to the Marbacher Meile. This is an event the church puts on each year to raise money for a specific cause or mission. It is a fundraising walk/run (a bit like Relay for Life.) The participants get sponsors to pledge a certain amount per kilometer. This year, the money was going to some children in Liberia and the church raised nearly 200,000 Euros! Michael and I did not run, but we volunteered at the event by helping to entertain the children for an hour. It was lots of fun.

When we got home, I had it in mind to make some cookies. Our friend who stayed with us last week had just come from Croatia. He graciously brought us a a HUGE hand-picked lemon and I knew that I would HAVE to find a very special lemon recipe in order to use such a very special lemon. I was able to find a Zucchini Lemon Drop Cookies recipe on-line. I was fairly certain I had seen a zucchini in the community fridge downstairs, so I got the other ingredients earlier in the week and set myself up Saturday afternoon with Ezra. Imagine my COMPLETE disappointment when I realized I had NOT seen a zucchini but a (that's right...you guessed it...) cucumber. I could not believe it. We had a good chuckle over it for a moment and I was just getting ready to pack it all up when we thought of our friend, Andre, who has a car here. Michael called him up and he was glad to take Michael over to the grocery store to retrieve a zucchini. While he was gone, Ezra and I cracked and shelled a bag of walnuts. Yes, I'm a cheap-skate. I was not about to pay nearly 4 euros for a quarter of the amount of chopped walnuts that I needed. We got a big bag for 99 cents...but now I know why the chopped walnuts are so stinkin' expensive. That job took us at least 30 minutes. Then I had to grate and juice the lemon. After that I grated the zucchini. Why is it that I always think these baking projects will just be a zip-zop affair. Yeah...I started around 2:30 and was not done 'til about 6! Holy smokes! But, they were worth it. Those were some darn good cookies. On top of that, a really nice cookie for summer. Very light tasting. I look forward to making them again once we get back to the States.

On Sunday, we had church. I sang with the choir for the last time and, to our surprise, after the service, we were invited to the platform. The pastor wished us all the best and told us how much they would all miss us. In order to support and encourage us through our next transition in a more practical way, they gave us a card with a monetary gift. We were floored and DEEPLY touched. After church, we made our way to Cafe Provinz to meet someone for lunch. I opened the card to read it and was COMPLTELY SHOCKED when 200 Euros fell out of the card! I had fully expected, at the most, 50 Euros. I burst into tears. Such generosity is a humbling thing. We are very grateful to everyone at the church and, above all, thankful to God for always providing for us. Here is a video of my last time with the choir:

We met Mario, a friend Michael has made through the archive, for lunch. He is not living in the Collegienhaus so I haven't had much interaction with him, but it was delightful to spend a beautiful afternoon with him. He came back to the Collegienhaus with us afterward because the Germany/England game was on in the afternoon. Of course, we were quite delighted that Germany won.

Monday morning I hit the ground running. I knew I would be going to the post office either Tuesday or today so I needed to get some packages together. We got all our suitcases from the cellar and I literally just started throwing everything in them that I knew would be going in a suitcase. No folding, nothing. I just wanted to get an idea of what was going in the suitcases and what wasn't. After that, I began boxing things up: mostly books, some stuffed animals, and some yarn. I always forget how long packing boxes for mailing takes. After lunch, I was exhausted.

Yesterday, after eating breakfast and getting dressed, I started making one of our final grocery shopping lists. Ezra and I met Michael at the archive around 10:30 then made our way to the bus stop. Our bus picked us up at 10:45 and took us to Handelshof. We had a week's worth of stuff on our list. We haven't done that much shopping at one time since we lived in Cincinnati! It was so exhausting! We are planning a small barbecue birthday celebration for Ezra's 3rd birthday which is this Friday! So, we were trying to decide what kind of cake to make. Of course, we tried to leave it up to Ezra, but, he was not much help. He was very clear on what he didn't want. I happened to see a cake mix with the stuff to decorate it in a pirate theme. "Ooh! Look at this one, Ezra! Do you want a pirate cake for your birthday?" I asked enthusiastically. "No! That's a scary cake!" he responded, as if to say, "Mom! I can't even believe you would suggest something like that! What kind of sick person are you?!" We ended up with a marble cake and a chocolate glaze. Ezra picked out some alphabet sprinkles to put on top. We had planned all along on taking a taxi back to the Collegienhaus. Even Ezra was thankful for the ride as we got out at home. "Wow! Thanks for the ride!" he shouted gratefully to the cabby.

After lunch, I started cleaning up a bit. Our friend, Mario, stayed with us last night in order to be able to come for our Tuesday evening soiree. (He hasn't been able to in the past because the last train to his home leaves at around 9pm.) I wanted the place to be cleaned up a bit. I was totally worn out, though, after I finished. We have had quite a few late nights (for several different reasons that I will go into in a bit) and my head was pounding, so I put Ezra in the bed next to me with some books and konked out for a bit. It seemed to help.

Our last Tuesday evening soiree was last night and it was a success. Lots of people showed up and we actually watched the game between Spain and Portugal. I made it to bed by 11, though. Can't afford too many late nights.

This morning I got up and hit the ground running again. I am determined to not do all of this packing at the last-minute. I got together all of the stuff we have borrowed so I can get it back to its owners. Kay showed up around noon to take me to the post office. We loaded up the seven packages in her car while Ezra had a complete meltdown! Earlier he had told me that he didn't want me to go to the post office. So, I explained to him why I had to go. I told him that the stuff in the boxes needed to get back to the United States and that by taking them to the post office, I was putting them on their plane back so it would be waiting for us when we got back. He seemed fine with this explanation. However, by the time Kay arrived, I'm pretty sure he thought that I was going back to the United States without him. "You CAN'T go to the United States!" he cried! "I want to go with you to the United States! You have to stay here!" We endeavored to explain the situation to him, but there was no consoling him! Michael had to take him out of the room so I could leave. Poor guy!

The post office experience was a breeze. Mailed seven packages for less than 10 bucks a piece. Really pleased about that. Afterward, Kay wanted to go to the commissary. I have never been to a military commissary before, so that was a neat experience. It's basically a regular grocery store. It has everything you would find in any normal grocery store except not as many off-brand items. Kay told me to get whatever I wanted. The entire time I had been wishing that I had known we would be going to the commissary because it would've saved us some money and headache going all the way to Handelshof. I did pick up a few things, though. I ended up getting some Betty Crocker chocolate icing for Ezra's birthday cake (they were a buck a piece) and the rest of the hot dog buns we will need for his party. I also picked up a watermelon for the party. Kay just about cleaned out the store! We made it home around 3pm. I am so thankful to Kay for taking me to the base!

So, I mentioned earlier that I've had several late nights the past few nights. There is a very important reason as to why I had those late nights. Some of you may have noticed if we're friends on Facebook that Michael and I have secured an apartment in Cincinnati! As I've said, we've had several good friends from Cincinnati who have been willing to go look at apartments on our behalf and take some pictures. Well, this past Friday our friend, John V., went on a tour of a place for us on St. James Avenue. This is an entrance to Eden Park which is basically Cincinnati's Central Park. It seemed like a really great place. However, John let us know that it was NOT everything it was chalked up to be. Oddly enough, though, as he was walking back to his car, he just happened to run into the landlord of a place a couple doors down who was just putting the place up for rent that day! On a whim, John decided to check it out. He sent us pictures of that place as well and that is the apartment we ended up getting! So, my long nights were spent composing emails to our new landlords taking care of the last-minute questions and figuring out the logistics of renting a place internationally. It's all worked out and we are planning to make the move down to Cincinnati on July 31st. Here are some pictures of our new home in case you're interested! We are so thankful for friends like John and Wes and Cole.

So, we continue to pack and continue to be busy. My schedule for the month of July back in the States is already filling up rapidly. That frantic pace is picking back up, but it's a frantic pace fraught with family and friends and I welcome it with open arms.

To see pics of the above, just click here!

Two Weeks

2010-06-23T06:48:00.000-07:00

Two weeks until Ezra and I leave Germany and fly back to the States. Crazy. As I've said before, I always knew the time would fly, but for some reason it still astonishes me. Coincidentally, it's also been two weeks since my last post. This is a first for me while living in Germany. Typically it's been no more than 5 days between posts, but the past couple weeks have been unusually busy. Of course, you can read all about them right here.

In the last post, I made mention that Michael finally shaved off all his hair. Of course, the very next day, the weather got cold again. I won't go on anymore about my disdain for the weather here. There have been plenty of posts full of that. However, not only did people not recognize Michael at the archive, but people told him it was his fault that the weather was cold again. You also may remember the dead body that turned up during our cookout on the same day that Michael shaved his head. Well, when Michael went to talk with Karl Lempp (the Hausmeister) about the situation, Karl thought that Michael was one of the paramedics. "It's me, Karl," Michael said. You could see the recognition in Karl's eyes all of a sudden and then he started cracking up. I don't think it's typical for the police to show up and find the dead body discoverers laughing, but that's what happened.

The next morning, we had a long walk. There is a lawn, garden, and farm supplies store on the exact opposite edge of town from where we live. This is the place from which I procured Ezra's jaunty, straw hat some of you may have seen in some pictures and videos of him. I had it in mind that Michael should have the same hat (in his size, of course) as a Father's Day gift. I figured I would just give it to him early because he needed a hat to cover up his newly-shorn head. Ezra rode his tricycle, which he is now really good at. But even with his speed on the bike, it was a hike. We finally made it to the store and made a bee-line to the hats. Unfortunately, the hat did not have quite the same look on Michael's head as it does on Ezra's. I could tell that Michael was pretending like he liked it for my sake. Of course, I don't want him to wear something he feels silly in, so we decided not to buy it. I was just a touch bummed. We settled on a bottle of wine from a local vineyard to share with our friends back at the Collegienhaus, so it wasn't a complete waste of time. That afternoon I did some laundry, for what I thought would be the last time, in the Lempp's washing machine. We had recently been told that the new machine would be installed on June 22nd.

The next day was a Sunday and, despite the gray misty weather, we decided to go have an outdoor brunch with some of the folks from the Collegienhaus at Cafe Provinz. It was nice and the skies were polite enough to wait until we had finished eating before they let loose the rain. Fortunately, we had our umbrella, but we still used the rain as an excuse to stop in for a scoop of ice cream at the local ice cream parlor.

That evening, we had some special guests. Our friends from Kansas, the H. family, who had been in France for the previous 2 weeks, made an overnight stop in Marbach on their way to Munich. They were able to stay with us and, of course, Ezra was delighted to have the girls back to play with for a bit. Unfortunately, it was a short-lived visit as they had to leave right after breakfast the next morning. They needed to make it to Munich in order to catch their train to Italy where they spent one week before heading back to the States. It was a tearful goodbye, but, our mantra has been, "We don't say goodbye; we say, see you later."

Unless you've been in a cave in the middle of the desert for the past month (and maybe even if you have!), most people know that the World Cup is going on. Being the most sports-loving/obsessed nation in the world, it is a bit hard for me to understand how the U.S. has successfully ignored soccer for so long. For some reason, the rest of the world is crazy about it, and I can't say that I blame them. We have been watching several games here in the common room downstairs. Actually, our past two Tuesday evening soirees have moved down there since no one would show up otherwise. I have not only gained a new appreciation for the sport simply because it's a blast to watch it with enthusiasts, but because it is a pretty intense game -- no timeouts, very low score (like hockey) so when a goal is made it's a HUGE deal, minorly injured people attempting to milk their injuries for all their worth, yellow cards, red cards! Of course, I am one of the folks in the camp that could do without the droning of the vuvuzelas from the stands. I feel like I'm in a room with a swarm of constantly buzzing bees.

Last Wednesday, was a fun-filled and busy day. We started the day off with a short hike with Karin and her children. The path was uphill and through some woods and it led us to a playground. Our outdoors experience was officially authenticated from the moment we got out of the car. Ezra and Niklaus both picked up sticks and began hitting a metal pole that was nearby. I turned for a moment and then heard Ezra scream. I turned back around to see him holding his face. I thought perhaps Niklaus' stick had slipped and accidentally hit Ezra in the face. As I made my way over to Ezra, Niklaus dropped his stick, grabbed his face and started screaming. Apparently, a family of wasps was residing in the pole and they were not pleased with the disturbance. Ezra was stung just below his lip and Niklaus, just below his eye. Apparently the pain was short-lived, though, as they were skipping along the path in no time at all. However, both of their faces were very swollen. Poor Ezra looked as though he had a wad of chewing tobacco in his lip! Here is a pic. And just in case we weren't feeling woodsy enough, Ezra encountered some stinging nettle right as we came into the park. Poor guy. Stinging nettle is another short-lived experience, though. The bumps are gone in a matter of minutes. I happened to catch a picture of them this time, though. The kids had a great time playing and you can see a video of our excursion below:

The afternoon was spent packing. We went to Austria to visit our friends Klaus and Martina over the past weekend and we left on Thursday. As we were packing, Ezra and I heard the tractor lawnmower outside. Karl Lempp was right outside our door. He called Ezra out. Ezra was beside himself with excitement. He climbed into Karl's lap and Karl let him steer the tractor in our yard. It was so great! His face was so focused. The following is a video of that experience:

A task I have been doing daily the past couple weeks is visiting Craigslist. We are on the hunt for an apartment back in Cincinnati. To be honest, I am SICK of looking at Craigslist and even though we aren't planning on being back in Cinci 'til August, I want this apartment hunt to be over. We found a place last Wednesday that looked really promising. A "too good to be true" type of place. So, we called on our friends. A couple of them went that day to take a tour of the place and take pictures for us. It was so kind of them. We got the pictures and their opinions that evening and, unfortunately, it was too good to be true. The house was great, but the location was not. So, the hunt continues.

Thursday morning we woke very early and headed to the train station. The trip went well, and we arrived at Klausi and Martina's home around 1pm. We had a lovely lunch with Martina (Klausi was at work) out on their terrace (complete with a view of the Swiss Alps) and then afterward, we decided to head out for a walk. A family with a son who is Ezra's age live across the hall from Klaus and Martina. Apparently, he was very excited for Ezra's arrival so he joined us with a couple rides. A bobby car for Ezra and a small bike for him. He also loaned Ezra some of his rain gear as it was beginning to drizzle slightly. The drizzle turned into a downpour the moment our walk commenced. We decided to push through it anyway, but after about 10 minutes, Michael made the executive decision that we were going to head back. Michael and I had each packed only one pair of shoes and drenching them did not seem like the best plan. So, we headed back and Thilo went home and got some of his toys to bring over to play with Ezra. It was very nice, even if Ezra was a bit tired. Poor guy. We had to leave the room one time because he just sat there and cried. I think he was not only tired, but a bit overwhelmed by the new surrounding and new people and not being able to speak with Thilo. I have never seen him like that before. I took him down to our room and he just sobbed for a moment. It was a totally different cry from any other he's ever had. It was just so pitiful. He was over it soon enough and back to playing and laughing with Thilo in no time at all, though. We had a lovely evening visiting with Klaus and Martina and watching a World Cup match. You know you're close friends when you can see each other after months and months and do just the normal things. I like that. Here is a short video from our walk through the downpour:

On Friday, Klaus and Martina had to work. Martina only had to work in the morning. We stayed around their home and just relaxed. Martina came and picked us up around noon and we went over to her parents' home. Her mother is an amazing cook and she made homemade wienerschnitzel and potato salad for all of us. It was so yummy. Afterward, we all just chilled out and watched the infamous yellow card World Cup game between Germany and Serbia. Martina's father is from Germany and he was not pleased with the outcome. Despite the loss, it was just nice to get to spend some time with her mom and dad. They are both such delightful and hospitable people and they just doted all over Ezra.

That evening, Martina had a function she had to attend for her school (she is a high school teacher), so Michael and I enjoyed a quiet meal together and watched a World Cup game after Ezra went to bed.

On Saturday, despite the continuing downpour, we made a trip to St. Gallen, Switzerland. This is where Klausi went to school. We decided to visit the Stiftsbibliothek which is the library of the Abbey of St. Gall. It is the oldest library collection in Switzerland and contains manuscripts dating as far back as the 8th century. We got to wear special slippers in the library and everything...you know...just in case you decide to walk on the manuscripts. Totally kidding. The library room itself is an amazing room with multiple, gorgeous frescoes in the ceiling. I could have just looked at the room for hours and hours.

After we left the library, we found a place with some yummy local wurst and fresh, hot bread for lunch. We were chastised by the man standing at the table next to us, though. He was a local and told us that we were not supposed to be eating the local specialty wurst with mustard. It was pretty good wurst, but I do like me some mustard.

We finished up our lunch and then located a house that W.G. Sebald (the man Michael is writing his dissertation on) used to live in. Michael was pretty stoked. We took his picture in front of it and everything. Then we piled back in the car and started making our way back home. Before we got to Klaus and Martina's home, though, we made a quick stop at the grocery store. Don't let anyone tell you that Europeans don't have large American-style grocery stores. If they do, they haven't been to Interspar. I was overwhelmed. I have basically been doing all my shopping at an A&P. It's a very small store. Talk about information overload. Being in new grocery stores is always an unsettling experience for me anyway. I really feel that grocery stores should give out maps at the door, particularly in Germany. Here are some videos from our time out during the day:

That evening, Martina had reserved a table at Rankweilhof, a nice local restaurant. For some reason, they were having a special South African buffet that evening (probably something to do with the World Cup) and two of the meat dishes being served up were Crocodile and Kangaroo. The latter I'm not so sure as to what it actually has to do with South Africa, but it was something exotic. I tried both, and actually really enjoyed them. There was a fun, traditional Austrian trio of musicians going from room to room playing that evening also. There was a bit of dancing involved in the evening and we all had a really great time. I was also able to see another friend of mine who also joined us for dinner. That was really nice but so hard to say goodbye after such a short meeting. That night, Martina and I stayed up talking about all sorts of things. It was so great to just have some time to chat. Here is a video from our time at the restaurant:

Sunday morning was relaxed. One of Martina's brothers, Stephan, stopped by and then her parents after that. It was very nice to get to say goodbye to them. We had fajitas for an early lunch and then around 1:15, we all piled in the car and Klaus and Martina took us to the train station. It was at that point that the pouring rain finally stopped. I am not kidding. It started pouring when we arrived on Thursday and was non-stop until we left. I have never experienced weather like that before. Of course, we've seen Vorarlberg (the part of Austria where Klaus and Martina live) before. We were there primarily to see Klaus and Martina. It was just weird. The following are a few random videos from our time there:

Klaus and Martina were such gracious hosts (as usual.) We were encouraged to make ourselves at home (and we did) and they are just so generous. Their home, itself, is stunning. (They actually have a bath tub that I can stretch my legs all the way out in. I don't think I've done that since I was a child!) They always go out of their way to make us comfortable. They are such great friends. It was very difficult to say goodbye to them. It's hard to not know when we will see each other again. It's hard not to be cliche at a train station, but I did stand at the window until I couldn't see them anymore. And I cried. Martina and I have become very close. She feels like a sister to me. As we rode through Vorarlberg, the mountains whizzed past us. I associate those mountains with Martina and Klaus and so many good memories. It will be a while before I see them again. "I don't wanna go home. I wanna go to Klaus and Martini's (Ezra's new nickname for her,)" Ezra cried. "Me too," was all I could manage.

Monday was a very busy day for us. We had our trip to the grocery store which was a bit different from all our other trips. When we arrived, we saw a bunch of signs hanging all over the place. I could tell that they were advertising 25% off everything in the store. Then I noticed the name of another grocery store chain on the sign. I concluded (correctly, it turns out) that Tengelmann is closing and Rewe (the other chain) is moving in. The sign said that the sale was going on from the 21st to the 26th. So, I figured the store would probably be closing not too long after that. I mentally prepared myself for the madhouse that was inevitably inside. Sure enough, people were running around like it was the day after Christmas at Target in the United States. I must admit, it is difficult to pass things up, but not having a car is a major deterrent. On our way out, we ran into someone from the church we've been attending. I expressed my desire to buy more, but that without an automobile, that was a bit difficult. "We can give you a ride home," she responded (in German.) How cool! So, Ezra packed up our stuff and hopped in the car with them. I told Michael the news that evening. My worry at that point was that Tengelmann would close before we leave. This would not be good since the next closest grocery store is by the train station which is a 20 minute walk one way. Well, turns out, my concerns were not in vain. Tengelmann will be closing at the end of June.

The rest of the day was spent cleaning and preparing for a guest we were expecting on Monday evening. D., is a man Michael met through the Fulbright program. He and his family are in a town in the Black Forest where he has been doing some research for his dissertation. When we saw them in Berlin, we offered our third room to him if he should ever need it so that he could come and work at the archive. He took us up on the offer. Although, he's working at an archive in Ludwigsburg. He arrived around dinnertime, when we all ate together in the common area downstairs.

Since I spent so much of the day cleaning and doing other random stuff on Monday, Ezra and I had a fun day yesterday. We started off the morning doing some finger painting then, after lunch, we went to the park. We road on the roller coaster about a million times, but I LOVE it. I think I want to ride it just as much as Ezra does. In the evening, we gathered downstairs again to watch the World Cup game. It was a great day.....

Except....the washing machine was supposed to be installed yesterday. How many of you have already guessed by now that it wasn't? Oh, the machine is there, bright and shiny and still in the packaging. But, apparently, they forgot to schedule the technician to come and install it. Apparently it involves a little more skill than just picking up a cord and plugging it in a wall. Yesterday was the week and a half mark. I had washed no clothes since the last time at the Lempp's. I finally broke down today and gave them a call. They said it wasn't a problem for me to do one load, which I did, gratefully!

This morning, we made a family trip to Handelshof. This is the grocery store down by the train station. Since it's such a hike, I decided to shop for enough to last us through Sunday. This is why it was a family trip. There is no way I could have made it there and all the way back with just Ezra and me. It would have been one heck of a trek back. It was a successful trip, even if I felt overwhelmed in the newer, much larger grocery store. You just have to get your bearings. I finally did and we got all that we needed. The walk home was still a long one since it's mostly uphill. We've decided that for the next couple weeks, we will probably all walk there once a week, do all the grocery shopping for the week and then take a taxi back. They're only 5 Euros and it's worth it. Plus, we only have two weeks left.

You can see pics of all of the above by clicking here and here.

Tractor Show, Broke-Toe Mommy, Wonderful Wading Pool, Haircut, On A Whim, and Cookout Drama

2010-06-10T05:28:00.000-07:00

There is a large field right outside our door. It was a great place to make snow angels and snowmen and sled this past winter. When spring arrived, the wildflowers started taking over. It was pretty amazing! Ezra and I braved them a few times, doing our best to avoid stinging nettle and trodding upon the millions of tiny creatures hiding amongst the color. At some points, the flowers were waist-high on me! About a month ago, Michael told me that it would eventually all be mowed down and farmers would use it for hay. Hey, horses gotta eat, but I have to admit that I was just a touch sad when the tractors showed up this past week. While it was very sad to see it all chopped down (and VERY annoying to hear them mowing at 7am!...make hay while the sun shines is serious business here....) it afforded Ezra a mesmerizing show. The mowing wasn't so very interesting (he's seen that before...) It was the raking and the baling. Ezra has sat outside the past two days watching in wonder as the machines make their rounds in the field. At some points, the tractors are only about 20 yards away from him. We've been eating our meals outside these warm June days and Ezra has to be called out of his hypnotic state and reminded to take bites of his food whenever this work is going on. And as if that weren't enough, there is a small parking lot at the top of the field that is getting new asphalt put down! As I was doing dishes today, I heard Ezra squeal from the stoop, "Look, Mommy! A steamroller!" I came over and sure enough, there it was. Below is a video of Ezra's private tractor show:

On Monday, I broke my pinkie toe. Our beds are platform beds -- just a mattress in a frame on the ground. When I first saw these beds back when we moved here in September, I just knew it would only be a matter of time before I smashed one of my poor toes on one of the frames during a middle of the night potty run. Turns out, I didn't need to be intoxicated with sleep to make this happen. No...middle of the day, wide awake was good enough. The good thing about breaking your toe on the frame of a bed, though, is that you instantly have something large and comfy to fall on, which I did. I writhed in the bed for about a minute, clenching my teeth to keep back the words my spirit didn't want me to spew. The pain eventually subsided, but now I have issues with my left knee and a broken right pinkie toe. Definitely not the condition I had hoped to be in as I mentally (and physically) try to prepare for going back to work in the States. Oh well. I've broken my pinkie toe before and they usually heal pretty quickly. My limp is already gone, but the purple, blue, and pink coloring is not.....

On Tuesday afternoon, Ezra and I headed to the pool. I noticed when we first started going this past winter that there is a small wading pool outside that seemed like it would be perfect for Ezra. This week, the weather has been staying warm enough to warrant filling the small outdoor pool. So, Ezra and I headed outside. It is wonderful out there! There is a huge grassy area with a mini jungle gym and chairs for lounging in and, of course, the little pool. Ezra LOVES it. There is a small fountain on top and when Ezra is standing in the deepest part, the water comes up to his navel. He's had a few accidental slippings under the water, but I'm glad for them. As long as he comes right up and I clap and tell him what a great swimmer he is, he is fine, not to mention he's learning not to be afraid. We have gone twice so far this week and each time it has been very quiet; not crowded at all. I have heard that there is a big outdoor pool place in a nearby town called Steinheim, so I'm pretty sure that's where all the big kids go. It's just been me and one other mom and her baby there so far. I'll try to get some pics soon and post them. In the evening, we had a dramatic upswing from our last Tuesday soiree. Last week we had two show. This week we had eight or nine! It was a lot of fun.

This afternoon, Michael finally got his hair cut. Normally, this annual tradition would have taken place a month ago, but the weather here has just not been consistently warm. Honestly, I could really care less how Michael wants to wear his hair, but I was actually starting to sweat just looking at him. Every time I would ask how he was holding up in any sort of heat, he would tell me he felt perfectly fine. Today did it, though. It was pretty warm here in Marbach. Michael came in the door at 4:30 this afternoon and announced, "It's time!" I didn't even have to ask him what he was talking about. Here are a couple before shots and an after shot.

We grilled out this evening with our new crop of Tuesday evening folks, so most of my morning was spent preparing salads and hamburger patties for that. However, Ezra and I did manage to squeeze in a trip to the park. We had the whole place to ourselves. Each day brings us closer to our departure and each day I become more keenly aware of the dramatic change of pace that is about to take place. I have been trying to enjoy every last moment of this laid-back existence. I like being able to take Ezra to the park in the middle of the morning on a whim without having to schedule it into my week. We were there for an hour and road the roller coaster zip line about 20 times. I fully intend to spend these last few weeks doing all sorts of things on a whim.

The cookout went very well. Two new people showed up whom I have not met before. They are also from the U.S. Lots of folks from the States are starting to show up since summer breaks have started in the U.S. It's really interesting when the Germans are the minority at our gatherings. Anyway...this cookout was a bit more dramatic than our past cookouts. I was engaged in conversation with a couple people when I looked up and noticed some of our group scurrying around the other end of the yard with rather concerned expressions and Michael was one of them. After I politely disengaged from the conversation, I was told that a dead body had just been found down the road -- literally about 100 yards from where we were standing. Unfortunately, the Lempp's 15-year old daughter, Jana, discovered it. I won't give you the sordid details. The police cars and ambulances showed up shortly after the discovery. We found out later that the body was identified as a woman who was reported missing yesterday. She apparently had some sort of mental issues. Also was informed that this was the first dead body that the police have ever had to take care. NEVER would have thought I would encounter that kind of drama here in Marbach. I feel really bad for Jana, though. Please pray for mental peace for her. I imagine that image is going to be in her head for quite a while.

The Castle Prison, Another Goodbye, Laundry Machine Blues, and a Silly Boy

2010-06-06T07:00:00.000-07:00

On Friday, Ezra and I visited a prison. No, we didn't get into any trouble of any sort and, no, we're not THAT curious about German culture. The prison is a castle -- the Asperg Castle. It is now used as a prison/hospital. Needless to say, we didn't go inside. We went with Karin, Helena, and Nicholas. It is positioned on top of a large hill (or very small mountain...depending on how you look at things...) so it affords a very nice view of the land below. We took along some munchies and had a small picnic on the top. While we were up there, we ended up conversing with some other folks. The elderly woman, who spoke the most English, was from nearby but the other three ladies with her were from Albania. Despite the fact that our conversation lasted no more than 10 minutes, Ezra was ready to go home with them. It helped that there were two older girls (about 13 and 10.) They happened to begin their descent down the mountain at the same time we did and Ezra walked hand in hand with all of them nearly the entire way down. It was hilarious. A ridiculously funny sidenote: on the drive over in Karin's van, we had our windows open. My window, however, was only open about 1 inch. Despite the tiny opening, a bird, with, apparently, extremely good aim, pooped right on my white pants. Hilarious. The following are some video highlights from our time up there (in which you will see Ezra's adopted family near the end...):

On Friday evening, we hosted our friend S. for dinner. He is from Bristol, England and was here for about a month this past winter. He came back again at the beginning of May and Friday was his last night here. I made a baked nacho. People always enjoy eating Mexican food here since it's not in great surplus. We ate outside and it was a delightful evening despite the fact that Ezra opened up our dinner conversation with the story of my run-in with the bird earlier. We will miss him a lot but hope to visit him and his wife someday in England.

Yesterday was pretty relaxed apart from the having to do laundry part which brings me to another topic -- laundry. Remember how I told you that the machine broke? It's still broken and still has not been replaced. We're coming up to a month now and, according to a conversation Michael overheard, it might be even longer than that! He overheard someone say not 'til the end of June. Not exactly certain why it has to be that difficult to get a new machine, but there you go. Of course, most of the important stuff can be done by hand (and I have done quite a bit of it in the past by hand) but washing adult pairs of pants and shirts without a proper washing area (ie. a bigger sink) is not so easy. Fortunately, the Lempps have been graciously letting us use their machine but I'm starting to feel like we're wearing out our welcome there. I believe I may start paying them if they'll let me continue to use their machine.

This morning we had church. We've been sitting up in the balcony mostly because it's easier with Ezra. He's not as much of a disruption up there if he happens to talk loudly or if we need to get up to leave for some reason. Other than church, we've been chilling out today. We did capture this video of our silly child this evening. (He has been into peeking his head around corners and saying something silly.):

Wunderbar!, Ever-Changing Soiree, Date Night, ANOTHER German Holiday, & Ponderings

2010-06-03T10:08:00.000-07:00

Wunderbar! Most English speakers know what this means -- Wonderful! Well, not only is it used in that sense here, but it is also the clever name of a local bar -- Wunderbar! Michael and I saw this bar when we arrived in town back in September and had a good chuckle over it. I really never thought we would go. Not sure why. It's not a dive bar or anything. It has food, etc. Well, I ended up there Monday night with some folks from choir. Instead of rehearsing, we made the decision to go out together. The previous week (with Thommy's death) had been a rough one for all of us. We didn't think we had it in us yet to rehearse. I'm glad we went. There were probably about 12 of us total. The place was very nice even if it was a bit over-priced. It was nice to see people smiling and laughing together even if I didn't understand what everyone was saying.

Tuesday evening, we had our usual soiree, but boy, has the mood dramatically shifted again. When we started our soirees back in October, it was typical for about 2 to 4 people to show up. In February, we had a dramatic upswing with nearly 12 to 15 people showing up each time! Well, we're back to square one. This past Tuesday, we had 2 people and our second didn't show up 'til nearly 10pm. It's not bad, just different. Michael and I have both observed that we are now within a "leaving time." I will elaborate. Typically a conversation has gone like this for us with a new person:

Mandi: So, how long are you here?

Person: 6 weeks. And you?

Mandi: Oh, we aren't leaving 'til July.

Person: Oh, wow, so about 4 more months! That's a long time....

Now the conversations go something like this:

Mandi: So, how long are you here?

Person: 6 weeks. And you?

Mandi: We leave July 7th.

Person: Oh, so about a month.

Mandi: (disbelieving) Yes.

A "leaving time" means that there are people here now that will be here longer than we will. It's really weird and, sometimes, a bit melancholy. Don't get me wrong; there are things and people we are looking forward to getting back to -- A LOT (I'll go more into that in a later post), but this has been a great experience. There are elements of it that I will miss -- A LOT (again, more on that later...) We've felt a bit like the "Ma" and "Pa" of the Collegienhaus but that will end sooner rather than later.

Anyway...our evening was very laid back. One of our guests was someone who was here in the winter so it was VERY nice to see her again. We all sat and munched on popcorn and enjoyed ourselves in general.

Wednesday was a big day for us for a couple reasons. The first being that Michael gave a lecture at the archive in German to a room full of native German academics. Just a little daunting but, if anyone can handle it (and did!) it's Michael. It went very well according to others (not just him...) The second was that Michael and I had our first bona fide date since we've been here in Germany! The Lempp's won tickets to a concert in Stuttgart and couldn't go so, they generously offered them to us and Jana generously offered to watch Ezra! So, we left our home, just the two of us, around 6:30pm to catch the train around 7. It was so odd. Of course, we have evenings together often after Ezra goes to bed. That's been one of the things I have enjoyed most about being here -- the amount of time in the evenings Michael and I have had together. It was just weird being out without Ezra. Oddly enough, the concert took place in the lobby of a bank at which we arrived approximately 30 minutes prior to the concert. The concert musicians were the winners of the Street Music Festival that took place in Ludwigsburg a couple weeks ago. Yeah...it felt a bit like something that could be turned into an Office episode. There were cubicles all around the seating area etc. After coming back from the festival herself, Jana had told me that the bands were so great and that people were dancing, etc. I was fairly certain that not a whole lot of dancing was going to be taking place in these crammed quarters but not only because of the space. I would say the majority of the crowd was at least 40 or older.

There were four bands that played. There were originally supposed to be five but the actual first place winners of the festival could not come since they had another (more lucrative) gig booked. The evening started off with Fortunate Fools -- a lively, energetic, mostly cover band. They had a couple original pieces and they knew themselves as a band. They were there to have a good time. And, limited space be damned, people got up and danced! You may be surprised to find out that I was not one of them not only because we were in the middle of the row, but because of my knee situation. But if my knee had been feeling better.......The band played mostly covers and at one point I just had to laugh at the situation. There we were, in the lobby of a German bank, listening to a German band (comprised entirely of men) playing and singing I'm Walking on Sunshine by Katrina and the Waves in English which was followed up by Lionel Ritchie's All Night Long. Most of the folks around us were singing along. Not the lady next to me, though. She was an elderly woman who, every time I let out even the teensiest bit of a whoo!, would look at me as if I were an unruly child in a library. We were cracking up.

Then Philadelphia came on stage. The three members of the band, Max, Lugi, and Lena, are siblings. Max had an upright bass, Lugi carried a guitar, and Lena sported a VERY small selection of percussion instruments on top of a box. They were phenomenal. Close harmonies, simple, clever, and, sometimes, plaintive songs. Their sound was so unique. They were the reason we were there. They are authentic street musicians and travel all over the place. Turns out, Lena's small kit can be strapped onto her back and Max can climb on to his bass while he plays it. As soon as intermission came, I was at the stage to buy one of their cd's. I had a difficult time deciding. I didn't have enough for both and they recommended to me their first cd since most of the songs are in English. I went ahead and followed their advice without hesitation after they consoled me with the fact that I could buy the other one online, which we will be doing. And you will be hearing their music if we have anything to do with it. Regarding their band name....Michael and I could only guess that they were going with the "brotherly love" them since their siblings.....? I forgot to ask.

We knew this group would be a tough act to follow (at least in our opinions) but wow! The placement of the next band, Midnight 45 (featuring Delia), after them was just cruel. Quite simply, they were awful. Nearly 400 bands auditioned for the Street Festival and only 40 were accepted. Let's just say I can't even believe that they made it into the original 40 let alone into the winners' circle! They had actually formed 3 years ago just so they could play at the festival. After Philadelphia they looked and sounded like a bad high school garage band. They played mostly covers and poor Delia has utterly ruined the song Isn't it Ironic by Alanis Morisett for us forever. Don't get me wrong; I love a good cover band just as much as the next person, but they just didn't know who they were as a band. They played Coldplay, Simon and Garfunkel, Alanis Morisett, I Wanna Be Like You (yes...as in the song that the orangutan sings in Disney's film Jungle Book!...which I actually think is a cover of a cover since I heard a rendition by the Jonas Brothers on Ezra's copy of the film)...it was just bad. To their credit, they did play a couple original pieces, but they were nothing earth-shattering. Surprisingly enough, they did NOT have a cd to purchase. I would have bought one if they had, though, simply to rid the world of one more wretched thing by burning it at the stake or smashing it underfoot. Harsh? you may say.....talk to me after you've heard this "band".

Moving on....the evening was closed out by a very polished trio called Cobario. Two guitars (one played in Spanish style) and a violinist. Great musicians. No lyrics just beautifully composed pieces of music. They knew what they were doing. The music was very pretty and quite lively at times and all were original pieces although, the sound itself was not extremely original. While I enjoyed them immensely, I did not feel compelled to rush the stage for their cd after the performance which finally wound down around 5 after 11! As if the concert hadn't been long enough already, ALL of the musicians were invited back to the stage to play together....? Talk about awkward. The musicians just kind of looked at each other. They eventually got something up on it's feet but most of the musicians just stood there and shook a percussion egg or tapped their legs. Michael and I left before what was, I'm sure, an extremely awkward end to the evening. We needed to get back to Jana which we did around 20 after midnight...we are so crazy! The following is some video footage I shot at the concert (the second, and last, band in the film is Philadelphia):

Today was ANOTHER German holiday. The archive was closed and the weather was atrocious -- cold (mid 50s for a high!) and rainy. Guess the weather has not broken yet...or maybe it's simply broken....We decided to stay in our pj's all day and chill out. Michael made pancakes this morning, we had tomato soup and grilled sandwiches for lunch (not a typical summery meal), I crocheted, we listened to our new Philadelphia cd. Nice day.

I've recently been kicking around the idea of expressing some things I've been processing through the past couple weeks. We are preparing, in about a month, to re-enter reality (at least, our reality.) I have started checking out Craigslist for apartments and getting in contact with potential employers in Cincinnati. I thought some of my readers might be interested in knowing how you could support us with prayer (if that's the sort of thing you do), but there is no obligation here....

I've been praying that God would have us stay in Cincinnati -- I know a lot of my family doesn't like to read that but we have a great community of friends there not to mention an amazing church -- but right now, we are only certain of what is happening within the next year. This year, we honestly thought Michael had a good chance of getting a teaching post at a university somewhere, but, for some reason, that was not what God wanted for us right now. We are very thankful that Michael has one year of funding left at UC (very little funding, but funding nonetheless....) and after that, he HAS to get a job in the "real world" whether it's teaching at a university or working at a bookstore. I know God has good plans for us (whether it's in Cincinnati or somewhere else). I know that he has not given Michael such success in his chosen career path (ie. Fulbright, Taft grant, publications, etc.) to let us simply fall flat on our faces. It's just not knowing what that will be after next school year that makes it difficult. The most difficult part of that for me is not necessarily the "not knowing" part but the possibility of having to say goodbye to our Cincinnati/Crossroads family AGAIN! It was hard enough the first time. Moving is not a new experience for me. It is something I did a lot growing up as a child and seem to continue to be doing as an adult. I'm actually thankful that I did move a lot as a child. It helped to make me the flexible, adventurous person I am today (having a mother and father who were flexible and adventurous was also helpful, I'm sure). Having said that, I have learned how to cope with the negative aspect of having to say goodbye (it is NEVER easy), but I have never moved BACK to a place. It's always been a clean break. When we left Cincinnati last May, I honestly thought it was for good. This is why I'm making my requests known to God. It's not common for Ph.D.s to continue working/teaching at the university from which they graduated. Typically because it doesn't look good for the department to hire from within, etc. But there are other universities in the area so, who knows....

As of now, we are in "living life by the seats of our pants" mode and I know this is healthy for me. I am a natural planner. I like to make sure that I always have all my ducks in a row and am ready for whatever is coming next. There are two negative consequences of this, though. The first being that I rarely ever live in and enjoy the moment since I'm constantly thinking toward the future. The second is that I put a lot of trust and faith in myself to take care of things. God is teaching me not only to be still and know that he is God (the one who will take care of things) but to just enjoy what is happening around me. It is very freeing to know this about myself but it doesn't necessarily make it easier...

Anyway....in summary, the best way you can pray for us (if that's something you do) right now is that God would give us the grace to rest in the midst of, what seems like, constant transition and, more practically speaking, that God would provide us with a nice, safe, clean place to live in the Clifton area of Cincinnati that has at least 2 bedrooms and just happens to be within our limited budget. We truly appreciate it.

Goodbye, Errand Drama, A Funeral, New Experience, & Calvin Elkins

2010-05-30T05:40:00.000-07:00

Friday was a rough day in many regards. It started off with a goodbye. The H. family from upstairs -- the ones with the girls from the States -- came to the end of their time here at the Collegienhaus. Hard to believe it's been 3 months since they arrived. However, it wasn't a final goodbye. They didn't go directly back to the States. They went to France and will be there for two weeks. Then they will swing back by here for a night (which they will be spending with us) and then they will head to Italy for a week. So, we concluded that it wasn't our final goodbye...not yet. Of course, Ezra has asked about the girls. The last time he saw them, we just said goodbye as we normally would. We didn't want to make a huge production out of it because, to be honest, I'm pretty sure he would have been inconsolable. When he asks about them, we tell him the truth. They don't live upstairs anymore. They took a trip to France, which is sufficient enough to distract him because he immediately asks "Where's France?" at which point we show him a map on the internet. We also tell him that they are coming back to see him in a couple weeks. So, it's not too bad yet. By the time they come and go again, Ezra and I will only have 3 weeks left here. So, maybe I will be able to keep him busy enough to not fall entirely into the pits of despair.

Ezra and I headed out to the store around 9. We had a bit of a schedule to keep. I needed to be home, at the latest, by a quarter after 11. I wasn't too concerned. At the most, a trip to the supermarket takes us an hour, even when Ezra is walking, which he was. We made our stop at the bakery and then we made our way to the ATM where we found an out of order sign on the machine. This is not good. I had the bank card which Tengelmann takes, but they only take it from Michael since his name is on it and I had no cash on me at all. I was faced with a decision. I could either flush the whole trip and let Michael do it later or Ezra and I could walk the 3 or 4 blocks to the other bank branch in town. After debating for a few seconds with myself, I decided that we would go to the other branch, but I was definitely annoyed. Of course, this had to happen on the day that I actually had some sort of schedule to keep.

Even with the small change in plans, we still ended up making pretty good time. I think we got back around 10:30. We ran into Michael in the park. He was on his way home and he came at just the right moment. I was getting ready to lug the grocery-filled backpack down the stairs from the park but he did it for me instead!

You may be wondering why Michael was heading back home from work at such an early hour (then again...maybe you're not...but....) He came back home because I had to leave at noon. Unfortunately, I had to go to a funeral -- Thommy's. The choir was singing for the funeral and we had agreed to meet early to practice. The funeral didn't start 'til 1:30 and we had planned to meet at 12:30. The Lempp's let me ride along with them and they told me to be at their place by noon. So, we all got the groceries put away and then I got ready to go.

I have sung for many funerals -- my grandmother's, Michael's Piki's, a woman whose home I used to clean, a man who went to my church when I was a little girl, just to name a few. It's never easy. In order to sing properly, your body must not hold any tension. You must be completely relaxed. The only problem is that your body is completely relaxed when it's sobbing also. Therein lies the problem with singing at the funeral of someone who was dear to you. Another difficult aspect is that it seems unnatural to not cry. Singing is not something we typically do in the midst of despair. Why do we do it then? one may ask. We do it to creatively honor their memory; to give the family and friends some kind of comfort. Singing and music can do many things for a person. When we hear a particular song or melody, we may laugh out loud, we may sob uncontrollably, we may smirk knowingly, or we may be comforted. Generations of people have sung to their crying children to comfort them. This is the only way I can sing at a funeral and why I always pray that I will be able to do it without crying (after all, what's the point of singing a song if you can't understand the words being sung....) I've found ways to cope in this situation. My preferred method is to focus on how happy I know the deceased person is now. I know Thommy is with God. He is in paradise, experiencing life as it was meant to be. When I focus on this, I can only rejoice in my spirit. Usually tears can't come. The tears only come when I think of all the broken hearts in the room, including my own. Our choir sang three songs at the funeral. I know not everyone was able to manage. We had an additional challenge. Thommy, who used to sing out in his loud baritone with us, could not be heard and you could always hear him quite distinctly before. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult it was for the peope who used to sit directly next to him. I was able to make it through all three songs successfully. It was helpful that I couldn't see the faces of his family. I grieved in between our songs.

The actual funeral was amazing (as funerals go...can you really say a funeral is amazing?) Over half of the people stood the entire time. There were not enough chairs for all the souls Thommy's life had touched. The service took place in the chapel located on the grounds of the cemetery so after the service, we all processed out to Thommy's grave. I had noticed earlier that many women had brought along a small bouquet of flowers -- probably something they had cut from their own gardens. I thought they had planned on giving them to Thommy's widow. Once we got to the grave site, though, I knew what they were for. Everyone was given a moment by the grave and there were bowls of flowers placed nearby. When someone went up, they grabbed a flower and threw it in. These ladies had brought their own flowers. I wish I had known about this tradition. I would have loved to have brought some of the flowers from my home. After we had a moment, we were able to pass by the family. It was the first time many of us have seen his wife and children since this tragedy began a couple weeks ago. Susi was accompanied to the grave by her son (who just graduated from high school) and her brother. Her two daughters (around my age) came behind. I have to say, this was one of the most emotionally exhausting funerals I have ever been to. That may sound odd, since I have had family members die. However, this funeral was different from all others I've been to in that this death was COMPLETELY out of the blue. The others weren't too big a surprise. Each person had lived a good long life. There was a sense at this funeral of so many people with so many things left unsaid. People who had summer plans with Thommy and his family. People who planned on seeing him at choir rehearsal this week. A mother who never anticipated seeing this. Employees who planned on seeing their boss at work the next day. People who wished they had taken the chance to tell Thommy how much they appreciated him. That was me.

There was coffee, tea, and cake in the garden of Thommy's home. Eating after a funeral has always been an odd experience to me. Eating, as with singing, is usually something we do corporately only for celebration purposes. Of course, we do celebrate Thommy's life, but still...it just feels odd. However, people are hungry after funerals. They are usually long events that take place in the middle of the day and the food has a way of facilitating much needed conversation and, dare I say, laughter. After nearly an hour of coffee and chat, the rain started up and sent us all home.

Today I had another new experience. I believe I mentioned here a couple weeks ago that I said I would conduct the choir for the service this morning. I've never done this before (apart from small children's choirs in the past) but I've sung in a lot of choirs and watched a lot of conducting (including my father who was my first choir conductor....he's the one who taught me how to conduct the different time signatures.) I also wanted to help Susi out in whatever way possible and she is the usual choir conductor. I must admit I did a bit of practicing last night and was a touch nervous when I showed up this morning. Not only was this the first time I would be conducting, but I would be conducting native German speakers. Ha! The song, however, was in English and it was a familiar one for all of us. We probably could have sung the song without me up there, actually, but I was honoured that everyone trusted me with the job. Honestly, the most difficult aspect of the experience was one I had not considered. Susi and her daughters were at the service. I hope she was pleased with how it went. Michael was able to record my debut conducting experience, so, if you're interested, here it is:

So, I've kind of dropped the ball on my whole thankful list project. Can't promise that I won't again, but it's about time I made a list for:

Calvin Elkins
(my father, Ezra's Poppio)
he likes to think about things
he gave me a bouquet of flowers on Valentine's Day when I was in 7th grade
he used to make us one-eyed jacks when I was a kid
he is not ashamed of his relationship with God and desires everyone he knows to come into relationship with Him as well
he used to drive us to school in the mornings and before we got out of the car he would always say: "Do your best!"
i know he is always praying for me
he knows the Bible well
he always helps others no matter the inconvenience (ie. he has always shoveled/plowed his neighbors sidewalks in the winter)
he gives people the benefit of the doubt
he likes to read; one of his favourite quotes: "Readers are leaders!"
he is one of the first people (apart from my husband) who comes to mind when I need comfort and affirmation
he is a HARD worker
he has had great success in his work and NOT at the expense of others
he always does the right thing even if it puts him at risk or may make him seem silly to others he always took me running with him when I was a kid (after a particularly sweaty run when I was in 5th grade, he told me to run ahead home, open the front door and back door and to stay out of the path in between....a minute later, he came sprinting through the front door, up the stairs, through the kitchen, out the back door, onto the deck and jumped into our pool in all of his running clothes...one of my favourite memories...)
he understands my Type A personality more than any other person I know because he's the exact same way.....nice to have someone to identify with
he LOVES his grandchildren, Ezra and Emma Jane (seeing his face when he sees Ezra after a long period of time is one of my favourite things ever....)
even as a nearly 30-year old woman, whenever I'm with him, I feel like nothing can go wrong...that he will take care of everything
he is honest
we look a lot alike which means we both look like his mom....we also share her "you're in big trouble look" and it's pretty effective
bottom line: i've always been proud to be his daughter